Name changed for this, as my partner knows my usual posting name. Sorry, this is a massive post.
My partner runs a company in an area of the construction industry. The work is usually for high-end new builds, usually on sites with professional project managers supervising. However, he was persuaded by one of his friends to quote for a local renovation project. He was quite pleased when the clients phoned and told him he hadn't got the job because he was so expensive (he's not). They later came back to him, unapologetic, and asked him to do the work. He initially said no, but he was cajoled back into the project by his friend.
It's been a nightmare. The project has been very poorly run and the clients have changed their minds about everything time and again. He is used to a certain degree of this, and can normally take the pressure, but they've got a particularly emotive, distrustful attitude that drives him mad. He's off-loaded much more than normal onto me. He's also fallen out with the friend who got him involved in the project and that's brought him down. Every bill is queried, with the implication that he is ripping them off. Every solution and product he recommends is questioned and queried and other, inappropriate, options suggested.
The project has finally limped to an end. Two months ago my partner took over the last, hard-to-get-hold-of component which will allow them to control the heating, lighting and ventilation remotely. The wall where they wanted the control panel and a one of the sensors still hadn't been plastered (their last plasterer walked out on them) so he left the two unfitted components in their boxes with the client. When they called him back after the plastering had been done, the parts couldn't be found. They accused him of taking the parts away with him. He didn't. None of the team ever remove paid-for components from a secure site. My partner says he gave them the boxes and they put them on a windowsill. The client denies this. They want him to pay for replacements. £600. My partner said no. They've phoned him several times, whinging and moaning and he has said stood firm and sent them an email telling them to order and pay for replacements and that until they confirm they've done this, he won't be answering their calls.
The wife just turned up on our doorstep, wanting to speak to him. He isn't here and I told her this. She then started on the 'We need to come to an agreement on this, we don't see why we should have to pay twice for parts your partner lost. He needs to replace them.'
At which point I exploded. I told her that he hadn't lost them, they had. That the job has been a nightmare but he's continued because he's a professional with a first class reputation. That their delays and unreasonable demands and the hundreds of hours of time they've spent on the phone mean that he's already lost money on this job and won't be laying out a penny more. She stood there and said 'It's been very hard for us' and I heard myself yelling 'I don't care! Go away, buy the components yourselves and he'll finish the job for you and then we can have nothing ever to do with each other again.' She argued for a while and I told her I had nothing more to say and I was going to shut the door on her.
After she'd gone I called my partner expecting him to say thank you and to have a laugh about it. Instead he said he should have just bought the replacement components and said nothing to me about it. It might have cost him £700 but at least it wouldn't have ended up with me shouting at her.
I now feel nearly as angry with him as I do with her. Practically every day for the last year I've had to listen to him complaining about her or her husband. They've phoned in the evenings and at weekends. He's had innumerable sleepless nights. He nearly lost one of his employees, who was so upset by the way he was treated by these people that he wanted to leave in order not to have to go back to the property.
AIBU?