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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed over a tub of egg mayo?

425 replies

Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 12:25

Yesterday morning we went shopping. We got lunch supplies for the next few days. I chose egg mayo as a sandwich filler and DP chose deli meats like chorizo.

I've just come to make lunch and found he's eaten my egg mayo. A full fucking tub. He has been known to pile it high on sandwiches but only after he's asked if we can share. This time he didn't ask.

I can't have deli meats due to being pregnant but I don't like them either, so now I have nothing for lunch. I'm fuming.

He's been in the bathroom for 40 minutes so far and has only just got in the shower. Why do men need to take a half-hour poo in preparation? He'll be at least 20 minutes in the shower than at least another 20 minutes after having a shave, so I can't send him out to get something else for lunch. My parents are coming this afternoon and I need a shower before they arrive. Instead I'm looking after our 2 year old daughter in my dressing gown and feeling grubby as well as hungry.

I also need a wee and we have no other barhroom/toilet so I'm getting very irritated.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 15/05/2022 14:41

I don't think you were being unreasonable per se.

But you seemed so determined to poo poo every suggestion offered. I find it bizarre that there was absolutely nothing at all in the house you could eat or that you couldn't knock on the door to hurry your DP along or nip in for a wee and take DD food for a few minutes etc.

But glad it's all resolved now.

And yes I'd post in chat next time 😉

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:42

GarlicGnocchi · 15/05/2022 14:34

Good hope he cleaned the bathroom too

Show quote history

He actually didn't, but only because I'd already done it.

OP posts:
mogtheexcellent · 15/05/2022 14:43

Next time send the toddler into the bathroom with him with toddlers lunch if necessary. He doesnt get to opt out of parenting with 40 min shits.

genuinely amazed by some of the comments on here. Apart from the one about pissing on the salami. That was genius.

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:43

berksandbeyond · 15/05/2022 14:37

Must say I thought the same

Show quote history

So I "can't sort my life out at home" because my greedy DP ate a full tub of egg mayo?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
Cherrysoup · 15/05/2022 14:44

Elderly parents visiting and there’s nothing for lunch in the house?

GarlicGnocchi · 15/05/2022 14:45

Cherrysoup · 15/05/2022 14:44

Elderly parents visiting and there’s nothing for lunch in the house?

There is loads of deli meat

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:46

Cherrysoup · 15/05/2022 14:44

Elderly parents visiting and there’s nothing for lunch in the house?

They're not coming for lunch.

OP posts:
Oysterbabe · 15/05/2022 14:51

It is odd to have no food in the house despite shopping yesterday. Nothing to offer your guests? Nothing to feed your toddler if they are still hungry?

LoveinTheFastLane · 15/05/2022 14:51

I don't understand the timeline here OP.

At 12.35 you posted to say he'd be taking ages to poo, shower and shave. (Can't quite understand why a man with a toddler is not doing 2 of those 3 till after noon, but there you are....it suggests he's just got up.) And you are still in your dressing gown, unwashed, at the same time.

Are you in the UK (time zone?)

Now, 2 hours later, you say he's been to buy you flowers as an apology.

Yet not so long ago you hadn't spoken to him about eating your egg mayo and he was going to be in the bathroom for ages.

Am I missing something?

LoveinTheFastLane · 15/05/2022 14:54

So I "can't sort my life out at home" because my greedy DP ate a full tub of egg mayo?

It's not so much that, as your comments don't seem to tie up.

But also that you seem to have next to nothing in your house to eat and are having visitors you've not seen for 8 months, not even basics like eggs, or something to make a sandwich with.

GarlicGnocchi · 15/05/2022 14:54

Oysterbabe · 15/05/2022 14:51

It is odd to have no food in the house despite shopping yesterday. Nothing to offer your guests? Nothing to feed your toddler if they are still hungry?

We don't all buy tonnes of food. Cost of living crisis and all that.

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:57

LoveinTheFastLane · 15/05/2022 14:51

I don't understand the timeline here OP.

At 12.35 you posted to say he'd be taking ages to poo, shower and shave. (Can't quite understand why a man with a toddler is not doing 2 of those 3 till after noon, but there you are....it suggests he's just got up.) And you are still in your dressing gown, unwashed, at the same time.

Are you in the UK (time zone?)

Now, 2 hours later, you say he's been to buy you flowers as an apology.

Yet not so long ago you hadn't spoken to him about eating your egg mayo and he was going to be in the bathroom for ages.

Am I missing something?

Yes I'm in the UK. DP had a lunchtime shower because he spent all morning helping with doing jobs I struggle to do - cleaning out our two bunnies, going in the loft to put some stuff away and vacuuming the stairs. I have considerable health problems as well as being pregnant so I am truly grateful for all his help and absolutely do not begrudge him a shower (at any time of day). The reason I wasn't washed or dressed was because whilst DP was doing these jobs, I was cleaning a bit downstairs (just light dusting etc) whilst playing with and reading books to our little girl. DP and I both wanted to get jobs done before having showers.

OP posts:
CustardySergeant · 15/05/2022 14:58

ODFOx · 15/05/2022 13:46

Fried egg sandwich with salt and branston it is then OP.

In future when choosing your own fillings you both have to ensure that you can eat each other's: if he'd gone for ham or roast chicken you'd be having a lovely sandwich right now!

She hasn't got any eggs!

Giraffesandbottoms · 15/05/2022 14:59

Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:46
Cherrysoup
Elderly parents visiting and there’s nothing for lunch in the house?
They're not coming for lunch

but they are flying over to see you and they are old and unwell - surely you have some biscuits?

how do you find having bunnies with a 2 year old? I would like some bunnies

LoveinTheFastLane · 15/05/2022 14:59

But he's now had time to buy some flowers for you?

How sweet.

PriamFarrl · 15/05/2022 15:01

You may never have noticed them personally but this is a seriously weird thing to be so determined to question the existence of. This is like that time a MNer claimed she didn’t know you could buy pesto.
The best one was the poster who claimed you couldn’t buy haricot beans outside London.

Goldijobsandthe3bears · 15/05/2022 15:03

PriamFarrl · 15/05/2022 15:01

You may never have noticed them personally but this is a seriously weird thing to be so determined to question the existence of. This is like that time a MNer claimed she didn’t know you could buy pesto.
The best one was the poster who claimed you couldn’t buy haricot beans outside London.

It’s not like either of those examples, I haven’t said you can’t just that I haven’t seeeeeeeeeeen it 🤯 and I wanted to try it so 😛

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 15:03

Giraffesandbottoms · 15/05/2022 14:59

Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 14:46
Cherrysoup
Elderly parents visiting and there’s nothing for lunch in the house?
They're not coming for lunch

but they are flying over to see you and they are old and unwell - surely you have some biscuits?

how do you find having bunnies with a 2 year old? I would like some bunnies

They haven't flown. They are driving/ferry. Yes, we have biscuits! Crisis averted!

The bunnies aren't house bunnies. They are residing in a custom-built 12ft shed temporarily, until we move house and arrange better long-term accommodation for them!

OP posts:
Hortensiateapot · 15/05/2022 15:05

BritWifeInUSA · 15/05/2022 14:08

And you would have had time for lunch if you’d just got on with it instead of posting every minute detail of a trivial matter on here.

also thinking this, it’s a lot of text. Still hope OP gets a nice lunch in the end though

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 15:05

LoveinTheFastLane · 15/05/2022 14:59

But he's now had time to buy some flowers for you?

How sweet.

Err, yes? This thread was posted over three hours ago. Enough time for him to shit/shower/shave/whatever AND nip down the road for egg mayo and flowers.

Why is that so hard to believe and why am I still explaining myself unnecessarily???

OP posts:
Pumperthepumper · 15/05/2022 15:06

@Squiff70 is he often selfish?

dementedpixie · 15/05/2022 15:07

Her dh was out the shower by 1pm. Plenty of time to go to the shop and buy flowers/more egg mayo

Nanny0gg · 15/05/2022 15:08

Giraffesandbottoms · 15/05/2022 14:22

It's not compulsory to have a passport
Maybe they haven't planned to go on holiday yet and Werent they probably born in lockdown?

if your parents live abroad it’s pretty sensible to get your child a passport. My second was born in lockdown and we managed to get one - I thought it was just what everyone does; gets their child a passport once they are registered after birth. Saves problems and stress when you need to go somewhere.

Some of my ~DGC are in their teens and don't have a passport!

No, not everyone does it. Some can't afford it. Some don't need it.

Only on MN...

Onwards22 · 15/05/2022 15:08

I’d be fuming.

However I would have got a meal deal in the morning and got him to buy me some more tomorrow when you didn’t have such a hectic day.

He sounds very selfish (eating your food, spending ages in the bathroom, playing games on his phone whilst you do everything else etc) but you sound like it’s ok, like it’s just what men do.

It’s absolutely not what men do and it seems you are a bit of a pushover and he gets away with a lot of selfish behaviour and when you do call him out on it he buys you some token gift and you forget about it.

Original poster
Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 15:08

Pumperthepumper · 15/05/2022 15:06

@Squiff70 is he often selfish?

No, but he can be! I'm sure there are times when I've been inadvertently selfish too.

Anyway, guests due any minute so abandoning ship now for a bit.

Thanks for the laughs!

OP posts:
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