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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed over a tub of egg mayo?

425 replies

Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 12:25

Yesterday morning we went shopping. We got lunch supplies for the next few days. I chose egg mayo as a sandwich filler and DP chose deli meats like chorizo.

I've just come to make lunch and found he's eaten my egg mayo. A full fucking tub. He has been known to pile it high on sandwiches but only after he's asked if we can share. This time he didn't ask.

I can't have deli meats due to being pregnant but I don't like them either, so now I have nothing for lunch. I'm fuming.

He's been in the bathroom for 40 minutes so far and has only just got in the shower. Why do men need to take a half-hour poo in preparation? He'll be at least 20 minutes in the shower than at least another 20 minutes after having a shave, so I can't send him out to get something else for lunch. My parents are coming this afternoon and I need a shower before they arrive. Instead I'm looking after our 2 year old daughter in my dressing gown and feeling grubby as well as hungry.

I also need a wee and we have no other barhroom/toilet so I'm getting very irritated.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Lalliella · 15/05/2022 16:56

Nothappyatwork · 15/05/2022 16:43

We need all the eggs we can get to chuck at the Margaret thatcher statue in Grantham for God sake OP would you not think this through ?

👏👏👏

Lalliella · 15/05/2022 16:58

Herejustforthisone · 15/05/2022 16:21

Why are some posters being such cunts to a pregnant woman just because she wanted to be able to eat some of the food she bought for herself?

Well said. There’s no way either of us would eat all of something without checking with the other if they want it, it’s completely selfish.

kateandme · 15/05/2022 16:59

RedHelenB · 15/05/2022 14:13

They're with the sandwich fillers like coronation chicken, 3 cheese and onion, tuna and sweetcorn. Have them in every shop I've ever been in.

Show quote history

Plus 1) the egg mayo always has one she'll in it that surprises you mid bite.
2) the cheese and onion one IS the better one of them all.
3) they are so much money it's painful to see.
But yes they are everywhere.even small express shops.

SpindleInTheWind · 15/05/2022 17:03

Herejustforthisone · 15/05/2022 16:21

Why are some posters being such cunts to a pregnant woman just because she wanted to be able to eat some of the food she bought for herself?

Because it's AIBU and they think they're being clever.

This was a shitshow from the first comprehension-lite response onwards.

NoThanksThough · 15/05/2022 17:09

Giraffesandbottoms · 15/05/2022 15:17

This explains why there are always people panicking about their children’s passport just before a holiday! The thought of not having a passport ready to go for emergencies like funerals abroad makes me very twitchy.

didn’t know a child passport is only 5 years though that’s very good to know so I can line up the next one

I don't know, a lot of the threads I've read like that are people who didn't realise their kids passport is close to expiring or that it already has, so possibly people like you who don't know that kids passports aren't ten years and assuming they have another five left when it's actually expired?

CrazyCatLover · 15/05/2022 17:10

I’m not quite understanding how egg Mayo is different/ less risky than deli meat during pregnancy?

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:14

Fucks sake

it’s irrelevant as to whether egg Mayo is “really easy to make”, that’s your opinion. Maybe she can’t be arsed to boil eggs and just wanted something super quick. I couldn’t be arsed boiling egg if I literally was planning on a 2 min sandwich

it’s also irrelevant that you think pre made egg Mayo is minging.

the husband was a selfish bastard to eat a full tub in one go knowing that the op couldn’t eat what he had selected. Why didn’t he eat the deli meats he picked for himself? Greedy pig. No wonder he’s having a 30 min shit after eating all that.

Give him hell Op he deserves it for being so inconsiderate.

stuntbubbles · 15/05/2022 17:16

CrazyCatLover · 15/05/2022 17:10

I’m not quite understanding how egg Mayo is different/ less risky than deli meat during pregnancy?

Because guidance says be careful with cured meats but (British Lion) eggs are fine.

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:19

@Searchfornessie

“what have you been doing all morning OP if you and your kid aren’t even dressed by 1pm?!”

a) that irrelevant. She can stay in pj’s all day if she wants as can her kids

b) why is it up to her to get the kids dressed. Her Husband could have done it if he wasn’t too busy shitting out all the egg Mayo he’d consumed

SpindleInTheWind · 15/05/2022 17:22

AIBU Condensed

OP: My husband did a thing ...

AIBU: You're a cunt. Do better next time.

LovelyLovelyWarmCoffee · 15/05/2022 17:24

Squiff70 · 15/05/2022 13:41

Things I have so far learned from this thread:

That having a toddler in the house means we need 100 meals options for all three of us at any given time

That I need to plan 75 minutes in advance when I will need to wee so that others can time their bathroom use around my need the toilet

That I, as a mother and partner, am not allowed to choose one option for my own lunches whilst carefully making sure everyone else in the house has what they need for their own

That I need to learn to share a FULL FUCKING FUB of egg mayo and not be permitted enough for one sandwich

That I should keep eggs and mayo in the fridge at all times even though we don't usually use them, for mere inconveniences such as this

That I should have allowed DP his shit and shwank time and taken the toddler to the shop with me for lunch options, unwashed and in my dressing gown, because I was the one moaning about it

That I should inconvenience my elderly and very unwell parents by asking them to stop en route to buy my some egg mayo

That I should cancel said visit from elderly and very unwell parents because my lunch had been inconvenienced

That I should be more organised as a mother and be able to have a shower and do everything else in preparation for visitors whilst looking after a hurricane of a two year old just because her father had eaten my lunch

That people automatically assume that I should have lunch options in for my parents who are visiting mid-afternoon

That I have now inconvenienced a man (shock, horror) by asking him to be a father and help me with childcare so I can shower even though he wouldn't have needed to be inconvenienced if he hadn't been to selfish

That I must learn to "share" food without him needing to ask permission because its what people do, yet its fine for him to eat a FULL tub without sharing with me

That lighthearted threads must always be labelled as such to make it clear that they are intended to be lighthearted

There are more lessons learned here but I just don't have time to list them all.

Maybe, just MAYBE, he shouldn't have eaten a full tub of egg mayo in less than one day then I wouldn't have had ANY of these problems or felt the desire to post a tongue-in-cheek thread about it on Mumsnet.

PS. In case there was any doubt, this post is also intended to be lighthearted.

Great answer OP!
I don’t get why posters answered the way the did, of course when you choose something specifically for you it is not ok for any household membre to eat all of it without asking 🙄

Lipsandlashes · 15/05/2022 17:26

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Sistanotcista · 15/05/2022 17:27

KateW73 · 15/05/2022 12:49

He eats your lunch and stops you from peeing. The obvious two-birds-with-one-stone solution would be to pee on his deli meats.

😀😀 😀

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:27

I would deffo have a shower and go to toilet etc whilst caring for toddler though. Do not be a martyr OP

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:29

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

@Lipsandlashes

clearly a woman daring to confront a man who has been selfish has blown your mind

ElevenSmiles · 15/05/2022 17:31

Don't ever do light hearted again OP....You come across as a right misery arse...

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 15/05/2022 17:33

Searchfornessie · 15/05/2022 16:01

what have you been doing all morning OP if you and your kid aren’t even dressed by 1pm?!

The fuck has that got to do with anything? We don't get out of our pjs some days at all. Shock horror.

LidlMissSunshine · 15/05/2022 17:34

The state of some of these replies.

They each chose something for their lunch. He ate hers knowing she can’t eat his and then he fucked off to leave her feeding their child while he had a 40 minute shower and a shit.

And people’s solution to this is for OP to stop complaining and make her own lunch. Again.

I must live on a different planet because this would annoy me off so much. The casual cheeky fuckery of it, under the cloak of ‘what’s the big deal? It’s only egg mayo!’ Gaslighty as fuck. Not only does he get to take the poss, he gets to make OP look unreasonable when she complains. And you’re all buying into it too!

BuanoKubiamVej · 15/05/2022 17:37

Your DP was definitely unreasonable.

But these two facts are not compatible and can't both be true
(1) your DP can eat a whole tub of egg mayo in a single sitting
(2) there's no point keeping eggs in the house as they get thrown away/never used.

Eggs are a household basic. A box bought in the supermarket usually has a use by date at least a week and a half away. Buy a box a week and 2 days before the expiry date turn whatever hasn't been used in anything else into egg mayo that DP can polish off in the blink of an eye. There are lots of toddler-friendly things to do with eggs too.

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:39

So much mumsnet privilege showing on this thread…

you should always at all times have a full cupboard of food and a fridge full too when you have a child. Regardless of what your income is like and regardless of whether that means a lot of food waste and hence money waste.

Its perfectly ok to eat a full tub of sandwich filling in one go. This is not ok. It’s greedy. And a waste of money, that should have done for about three lunches.

You should buy a house with more than one bathroom has even been said. But of course! Everyone can afford to move at the moment can’t they.

FFS!!

chocolatemademefat · 15/05/2022 17:40

If he’s eaten a whole tub of egg mayo no wonder he needs a twenty minute shit. And you need to get things in perspective and make yourself some lunch - after barging into the bathroom if you’re desperate. I wouldn’t have egg mayo though as eggs can have an unfortunate effect on the bowels and if both of you are full of them it could make for a windy night!

HopingForMyRainbowBaby · 15/05/2022 17:41

Quick text, hi Mum/Dad on your way round to ours please could you pick up a tub of egg mayonnaise so I can make some egg Mayo sarnies. Although egg Mayo has hardly any flavour and should be made with salad cream instead!!

dementedpixie · 15/05/2022 17:42

CrazyCatLover · 15/05/2022 17:10

I’m not quite understanding how egg Mayo is different/ less risky than deli meat during pregnancy?

Because the meats that were bought have only been cured rather than cooked

Shop bought egg mayo is made with cooked eggs and pasteurised mayonnaise

cleolayne · 15/05/2022 17:42

Super annoying but surely you havr eggs and mayo in the house? It takes 5 mins to make

LidlMissSunshine · 15/05/2022 17:44

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2022 17:39

So much mumsnet privilege showing on this thread…

you should always at all times have a full cupboard of food and a fridge full too when you have a child. Regardless of what your income is like and regardless of whether that means a lot of food waste and hence money waste.

Its perfectly ok to eat a full tub of sandwich filling in one go. This is not ok. It’s greedy. And a waste of money, that should have done for about three lunches.

You should buy a house with more than one bathroom has even been said. But of course! Everyone can afford to move at the moment can’t they.

FFS!!

I know! Deli meat is expensive as well and there’s one poster telling her to throw it in the bin!

Presumably the same bin that OP chucks her used £50 notes in after she’s finished wiping her arse.

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