To be happy with this

[Sarahs901]

Ok, so I am not married and have 2 children, my partner is a wonderful dad and I am really really happy, we have been together since we were 18 and I would trust him with my life. I have had a lot of mental health issues over the years and lacked stability hence why he has never asked me to marry him. I am in a much better place now mentally and am very happy and our relationship is at its best.

I work 3 days per week WFH, one of the days I don’t even feel like I’m working at all and I get to be with the kids as one of the days is a weekend. I earn about £1000 pm and could up my hours if I needed to. My partner has a great job and earns about 80k, we are ok financially but I think when the kids start school I want to maybe go full time or look for something else? Is £1000 pm ok money for 3 days per week, is work life balance more important than money?

Yes - he would also be entitled to widows' benefits if you died young and he was left as a solo parent to your children.

@coffeecupsandfairylights ok so I spoke to him last night and he said ok let’s get married.

I’m really not one for big parties and have never had a birthday party as I hate the attention. I literally just want to get married?

You don’t have to have a party. You can just go to the registry office by yourselves and ask two of the staff to be witnesses. It takes about 15 minutes.

Ahh really I didn’t know that! How much does it cost do you know?

According to this, about £140 but it varies, depending on where you live. You have to give 28 days notice.

www.hitched.co.uk/wedding-planning/ceremony-and-reception/registry-office-wedding/

Approach it on the basis of protecting your DCs future? As in sitting down and talking through life insurances, LPAs and wills for both of you with a financial advisor - it isn’t just about money! Most IFAs would be quick to point out the benefits of marriage even if it’s only just to contrast the differences in having to make certain provisions when you’re not; stuff that just follows as s matter of course if you’re married. Eg. as it stands, neither of you are the other’s legal next of kin so that might cause issues in terms of medical consents etc. If you had LPAs you’d get around that. When times are good, no one wants to think about think about the bad things that might happen, but honestly it’s the right time to do it

Whoops! Posted too late. Advice still holds good though. Congratulations!

I can’t believe it was that easy? Ha!

Congratulations!

It's amazing how many issues can be resolved with a conversation, lol.

We got married down the registry office with just our parents' as witnesses - it cost around £200 I think.

Thank you for all your great advice!

Really pleased for you @Sarahs901.