To not understand why none of my neighbours answered the door

[Ihateitalot]

I moved in a month ago. I needed to get 10 year old dd from school but there was an issue with my front door not closing. I could have gone out the back but there was still the issue that the front door would literally not close.

I knocked on houses to see if someone could keep an eye on my door for max 15 mins. I could see some neighbours through their windows completely ignoring me or peeking back at me and then disappearing. The neighbour across from me I couldn’t see, but while I was phoning my mum to collect dd for me she answered the door for an ASOS parcel! Just so rude.

I’m beginning to think it’s because my face doesn’t fit, if you know what I mean. Next door but one completely blank me, and have crossed the street when they see me coming. I didn’t bother knocking on theirs.
One of the neighbours across from me was initially friendly, so I thought. He came over asking who my landlord was, then preceded to blank me every time after.

I feel like moving again.

I don't think I have ever not answered the door. It's weird behaviour.

Totally bizarre

I would answer the door (because its a normal human thing to do and) because otherwise the person knocking will think there is no one home and that is much more dangerous if their intentions are actually as malicious as everyone seems to assume. Ever considered that non door answerers???

could just be that they are just snotty shitbags like the people in the village I grew up in. 🤷🏽‍♀️

I wouldn't answer the door except quickly for a parcel I see coming or to my child coming home from school, as I WFH and am usually midst an MS meeting or telephone calls with patients. I wouldn't want to get caught into a long chat with my NDN whilst s/he chats for ages despite me saying "I'm in a meeting is this an emergency?" ( one of my NDN pops round regularly as he doesn't work to witter on about fence or whatever)

Things have changed a bit with people WFH. If I wasn't working, I'd answer the door to anyone (but feel irritated if it was uninvited visitors wanting to come in !)

Ofc your suspicion may be right, it may be covert racism or that and some other factor.

Quite right to not take parcels in for neighbours if they aren't friendly to you.

As it's early days, I'd wait and see how friendly the neighbours are. Try waving hello when you see them going to your cars or in driveways/say hello in passing when out. If they ignore you, then they're displaying their ignorance and you'll know for sure.

Your neighbours are clearly all Mumsnetters!

Ha! Exactly what I was about to post, but you beat me to it.
MN batshittery and lack of logic at its finest

This could have been a real emergency and nobody was prepared to help which is awful.

I WFH in a job where I get calls. If I was actually on a call I couldn't have answered the door, but if not I would have answered.

I wouldn't have been able to help you, but would have told you that. Unfortunately some people struggle to say no, so possibly avoid situations where they may be asked a favour.

I’d give them the benefit of the doubt this time because you didn’t move in a long time ago and perhaps they didn’t recognise you. I ignore the door if it’s a cold caller or similar, they might have thought you were. It may be worthwhile popping round to the NDNs to introduce yourself?

My NDN both moved in after I did, and one of my previous NDN had already introduced themselves to me briefly but when I moved in I put a note through the door introducing myself and letting them have my phone number. At least they knew who I was.

I think your view that the only possible reason anyone wouldn't open their door is because they are so racist they won't even speak to a non 100% white person and that every single person in your neighborhood is racist in this way....says more about you than them.

Also do you live in the south? If so, that's how people are, and I recommend you move to the north where people are friendlier. (I am from the south myself)

I live in SE London. I could name everybody in the 10 houses nearest to me (first names only in most cases) and they know me and DH by name.

i open the door if it gets knocked on. We all help each other out. The only time I didn’t answer my door was when we all had Covid but I went to the window and held up a sign that said that. I have one neighbour who is a grumpy cow that barely talks to anyone, she’s quite unpleasant really but I’d still answer because if she is knocking on my door then must be in great need.

Sounds like they are racist to me. Who doesn't answer their door? Even when I can't be arsed as my lounge is on second floor I lean out the window and see who it is and speak to them . Bet they open them for their ocado delivery lol
Anyway hope for your sake op that this isn't the reason and that they are just rude to everyone who knocks

It says more aboit you tbh. Maybe you are racist like them? Are you? Would you not open your door to a black or mixed race person but not have to think twice about it for a white person.

That is the question people should be asking themselves.

Also do you live in the south? If so, that's how people are, and I recommend you move to the north where people are friendlier. (I am from the south myself)

I'm a northerner who's lived in the south for decades. I answer my door, as do my southern born neighbours.

You forgot the written invitation as well as the 6 months notice!

If someone knocks on the door I open it. It’s only on Ann that I’ve heard that people don’t.

I would not think twice about answering my door to a neighbour. Or anyone really. sorry that happened to you.

They are just racist, predominantly white areas tend to be arsy. Sorry about your experience.

They should have answered the door to you or at the very least, opened a window to you to ask what you wanted. Some strange comments re not right to expect people to answer the door if you’ve not met before. By the sounds of it they couldn’t be trusted to watch your house for you. They’d have probably congregated and gone in nosying around. Best ignored.

Hi there,

Maybe the last owners were not nice people, and so they are slow to come and meet you. In case you are related to them. Maybe I am totally wrong, and they are just in their own heads worrying about life in general.

This feed makes me want to move countries. There’s no sense of community here at all and it’s sad. I’ve opened my door to people in need many times because you just don’t know when you’ll be in a position and need to knock on someone’s door. Your mixed race, you immediately scream danger tbh I’m sorry if I lived on your street I mostly definitely would have watched your door for you, X

They didn't know what you were asking for. Frankly I'm horrified that you live in an area like that. Sadly systems in this country (aided and abetted by others who have an interest in stoking dissent and disagreement) lean towards "bad until proven good" - basically its a fear based, rather than a collaborative based society - in general. I am delighted to live in a pocket of community that is not like that - lots of mixed race and different race people. Its so supportive of me - a white person - I love it! Community is so important. This post breaks my heart.

It probably is that. I’ve had that with older white couples on council estates

We are a mixed race family and that does very much determine where we live sadly. It’s disgusting but we live in quite a right wing country now so that’s the reality of where we are at. If you don’t have to consider this in your daily lives think yourself v lucky. OP feel for you mate x