To not understand why none of my neighbours answered the door

[Ihateitalot]

I moved in a month ago. I needed to get 10 year old dd from school but there was an issue with my front door not closing. I could have gone out the back but there was still the issue that the front door would literally not close.

I knocked on houses to see if someone could keep an eye on my door for max 15 mins. I could see some neighbours through their windows completely ignoring me or peeking back at me and then disappearing. The neighbour across from me I couldn’t see, but while I was phoning my mum to collect dd for me she answered the door for an ASOS parcel! Just so rude.

I’m beginning to think it’s because my face doesn’t fit, if you know what I mean. Next door but one completely blank me, and have crossed the street when they see me coming. I didn’t bother knocking on theirs.
One of the neighbours across from me was initially friendly, so I thought. He came over asking who my landlord was, then preceded to blank me every time after.

I feel like moving again.

You have your answer in the responses on this thread 😂. I think your neighbours sound very unfriendly.

You have moved to an unfriendly neighborhood. Not your fault!

Of course it is not racism

How on earth do you know?

The OP knocked on several doors. It's very MN to decide that all of the neighbours were obviously acting as a homogenous bunch.

The reality is that each neighbour likely had a different reason for not answering. And one of them might have been racist. Literally, none of us know.

I agree, people are saying they don’t open the door if they aren’t expecting something, but to see your neighbour and know they have seen you and just sit there looking at them or slink off…so rude.

I don't think it is you. People have become just generally unfriendly, I think. There are so many crime shows on now that people are afraid there will be some terrible fate waiting for them if they open it. I wish I lived near you. I would have opened my door!

So am I. No-one can anticipate a door not closing FGS.

It may be racism, it may be they'd treat everyone or, at least, anyone new the same way. Can't tell for sure from one vignette, though I can see why you'd wonder. I'm not surprised you felt ostracised and I would be second guessing my move if that happened to me, too.

For what it's worth I think it's fairly unusual to get such a blanket response from a neighbourhood. I've lived all over the England and I haven't had that sort of experience. There are always homes where no one ever answers, but they tend to be the exception.

Some places, though, are just a little harder to break into than others. A move is a big deal and pretty expensive, especially with kids, so it's worth trying to put this behind you and see if you can find other ways to connect. I hope it gets better.

Odd behaviour, for sure.

They didn’t know that’s what she wanted, they didn’t open the door.
I do think racism is very possible, I’m white but could easily be a number of ethnicities, neighbours one side point blank refuse to acknowledge me, despite speaking to all other neighbours. We couldn’t work out why until neighbour the other side told us horrible neighbours had been making enquires about where I’m from🙄

I dont answer m door -i recognise my neighbours now of course if they just moved in no

and to all the people saying she just wanted them to watch her door-how the fuck would the know that

There's probably a thread somewhere
Some random woman knocked on my door earlier, I think I might have seen her before. What should I do?
Answers will include
It's a well known scam op, they are casing the street.
Log it with the police.
She's probably having an affair with your dh
Could your dh be on drugs? Have they left a package hidden?.
(Enter sensible poster) , maybe it was a neighbour who needed something?

Omg you're so nieve this happend to sisters hairdressers cousin, it turned out to be a mass murderer.

(Yes I have wine & to much time on my hands😁🍷)

I dont answer the door, particularly if its one of the neighbours as quite honestly I dont want to talk

I would open the door if I spotted it was a delivery, or perhaps if was someone official looking, like the police

I certainly wouldnt answer if it looked like someone from one of the utilities

Especially I am never answering the door to the utilities people, they don't know for an answer! Just a quick look at the gas meter, and then you loose 45 minutes of your life looking for the damn thing.

It is not the 1970s now! Knowing your neighbours, knocking on the door for a pound of sugar etc just doesn't happen anymore. Most people work, and those that don't are too old and afraid and instructed not to answer by their families.

You need to look at their point of view op.

MN is batshit about not answering doors. If someone knocks on my door, I immediately think "ooh how interesting - I wonder who that could be", and hope it will be someone trying to distract me from whatever boring thing I'm doing.

What's more, I think Ring doorbells are Big Brother terrain.

So There.

I'd have answered the door to you, OP. I'd probably have pressed tea or wine on you to boot.

No wonder there is no sense of community these days. I can’t believe people on here are saying they wouldn’t have opened the door, or been willing to help you out. I know all my neighbours and this wouldn’t have been a problem at all.

I certainly wouldnt answer if it looked like someone from one of the utilities

Why? I think that if they are estimating your bill they have a legal requirement to read your meters every so often. Why do you have a problem with this?

Tbh I'm wfh and I wouldn't have answered the door. I can see who it is on the screen and if you don't have something to deliver I wouldn't have opened. There are a few people who I have let in without a package and they were trying to sell me something, so no I wouldn't have interrupted my work day unless it was a package.

And you had a huge ask. Did you actually want someone to stand there watching your house for 15min?

Sounds like when I moved to Yorkshire for a year. None of the school mums even looked at me and my next door neighbour invited me over, was out when I called round at the stated time (and again a bit later) and never spoke a word of it thereafter! I’ve never really experienced anything like that before.

Don't be so ridiculous, you can't book in a convenient time for your door to break 😒

That's the point, you wouldn't know what she wanted unless you answer the door.

If you can't help them if they want help you just tell them you can't. I don't get why you wouldn't see what they want?

I can't imagine not answering the door to a neighbour. I don't see much of them but we take parcels in for each other .

One knocked on the door the other day as their little dc had thrown a shoe into my garden

I dont answer the door, particularly if its one of the neighbours as quite honestly I dont want to talk

I always answer the door to my neighbours as I want to know what they want.

However I probably wouldn’t answer the door to someone I didn’t recognise before 9am simply because I’d assume they were just selling something and I’d be busy getting ready for work/the school run myself.

As this is such a strange request I do wonder if OP has form for asking favours of people which is why they all avoided her (we definitely have one of those here).

OP where have you moved from and to?
Northern people tend to be more neighbourly than down South IME.

If I'm not expecting anyone / a parcel I don't answer my door. It is always someone collecting for a charity, trying to sell you something, begging etc.

Did you fix your door?

Would it not close or not lock?