MIL didn't accept Mother's Day gift

[Gina97]

So I got my MIL a $25 Starbucks gift card for Mother's Day. We have a newborn so I wanted to get her something easy. She came by yesterday and when I went to give her the gift she told me and my husband that she didn't like Starbucks and didn't take the gift. I didn't make a big deal of it but am I right in thinking that this is insanely rude?

@Classicblunder oh for pity's sake. She bought both because she was in Starbucks.
If he had been in Starbucks he would have bought both.
If it's anything like me and my husband our money is all one pot and it wouldn't matter whose debit card was the one handed over.

No, the OP got that for her mum

So, on that basis, who did my mum and dh's mum get their gifts from?

I looked at the website at some ideas.
I made some suggestions to dh - a couple or so as not everything is always in stock.
Dh, who works near to the shop, was the one who went in and picked said items from the shelf and handed money over, and brought it home. Whilst there he decided to buy something for his mum too, to go with a book I'd ordered online for him whilst I was home (my mum had a little extra too which we'd both picked up whilst out the previous weekend.)
It was a cash card for a joint bank account which me and dh both contribute towards.
I wrapped both. Dh wrote his mum' s card (from him, me and dd) and I wrote mine (again from us all)
My mum received hers when we all visited.
Mil got hers one lunch time when he met her from work with dd.

Our present buying varies hugely. I do a lot of the choosing online but dh takes part too and has ideas. Online I am the one who generally orders. If it needs buying in store or collecting from somewhere it's usually dh who gets it due to where he works.

Well most gift cards are a cheap cop-out as a gift. ESPECIALLY something as crappy as Starbucks. News flash - not everyone is obsessed with their nasty coffee.

It takes a minute to think of a thoughtful gift or even just a kind card. Getting a gift card, especially one your sis probably got for you, is lazy af. And insulting

@JFab I have been going to Starbucks/Costa/Nero etc for years and have never ever bought a coffee there.
You don't have to buy the coffee if you don't like it. It's not compulsory 🙄

Not everyone is obsessed with Starbucks and their crappy coffee. When i get SB gift cards i KNOW the person doesn't get me at all and it's telling me the giver is basic AF

Who would prefer starbucks over home-cooked
I get that you have absolutely no time whatsoever to bake. Why not a nice, heartfelt card? She may have felt so little of her (or not at all) to get such a common, boring gift

Maybe MIL hasn't wasted her time in sb to know what they have. I've tried food yuk, their baked goods - too sweet, and non-coffee drink - bad.

Starbucks really is overhyped and really bad.

I stand by my belief that starbucks gift cards are lazy, boring, and thoughless

Malteasers ROCK

It's not difficult to take one minute out of your day to think what might make someone else happy

That's just it. OP wants accolades for not thinking of the recipient and only thinking "what's easiest for me!"

If her sister had worked at the post office, would MIL got stamps as a gift??😂

I boycott Starbucks so it would have been a useless gift to me.

I can understand if she wouldn't use it, saying she appreciates the thought but and would much rather you keep it for yourself.

But MIL frequents Starbucks. She's not sitting there with a packed lunch and a Costa coffee is she?

But that's only relevant cos you don't go. Ops MIL does. I put a £10 Starbucks card in my best friend's birthday present and she was really happy with it because she goes there. I wouldn't have done the same for my sister cos she'd have looked at me confused, said thanks and fobbed it off on one of her kids.

Yes YOU like starbucks. Not everyone is YOU.
That shows you were thinking about YOU and what's the easiest for YOU and not the gift recipient.

Why not just walk with your half-half-double-shot-no-foam-rappuccino and get a nice card

From OPs posts. The funny thing is my sister works at Starbucks and has mentioned seeing my mother in law there on more than one occasion.

Agree. Or needs assurance from strangers online for something.

I don't see an issue saying you won't use a gift card. It's the truth. Maybe MIL doesn't want OP wasting her money getting sb gift cards for everything for now on

That's NO excuse. Women have had babies for hundreds of thousands of years.

she was out getting coffee so if she can do that, she can stop and get a nice card. She got the card because she was at starbucks and assumed everyone likes what she likes

Why do you go out of your way to give "less than thoughtful" gifts. Do you expect those people to sing your praises as well?
What did you expect - that she would make a post about what an awesome starbuck gift card she got?

It's insanely American thinking to assume everyone likes the same crappy company that "everyone" else does. I'm of the opinion that a lot of people say they like starbuscks so they won't be left out of the friend circle.

Starbucks is gross. They just have good marketing. Notice that nobody has a "regular" coffee. They have to add 50 things to it and give ridiculous directions on how to make their coffee

(And yah I'm American)

She assumed that as. MIL was known to frequent the place that she liked it. Not unreasonable. She's been in there often enough for SIL to mention it.

Blimey @JFab chill out a bit.
You sound a bit hyped up. Have you have too much coffee this evening 😂

Big at JFab.

A Starbucks card is what you get for someone when you are rushed off your feet or in some other way unable to put thought into a gift, but something is required nonetheless.

Like when you've just had a baby and your useless lump of a husband sees nothing wrong with letting his wife do his thinking and buying for him and you know his mother goes to Starbucks.

As the OP, my biggest takeaways are these, apparently my husband who is also exhausted is a piece of shit for allowing me to buy his mother a gift. I am a piece of shit for choosing the gift that I did and my MIL is more in the right than not. Honestly that's fine though. Lesson learned all the way around but I stick with my original feeling that it's rude. (PS she was less than polite when she refused the gift)

You're not a piece of shit. You went above and beyond.

Your MIL is an ungrateful cow and your H, while tired, didn't push a baby out of his ass recently, and if he values getting a Mother's Day gift for his mother he should have organised one before the baby was born.

Don't fall into the trap of doing your H's family gifting, @Gina97.

He needs to get his at together. You're not his secretary.

*act

It was really rude of your MIL especially since you know she goes to Starbucks and you gave your mother the same.
My son and DIL know I don't want gifts, just call me They live in the Philippines and I'm in the US.
I got a call and was happy.
Don't understand this rude MIL at all.

Next your just send a card, no gift of any kind.