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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'Messy' guest room sheets

200 replies

WorkingOnItWhateverItIs · 05/05/2022 14:22

I'm pretty sure I'm not being U but also want to check I'm not being a fusty old cow.

Had some friends round, three couples, one who isn't local asked if they could crash at ours rather than not drink or get a taxi. We said, sure! We have a guest room, all good.
They're mid 20s, my DH and I are early 40s. We have an 11y DS.
We'd told them that evening that we're early risers, just as a heads up. All good.
Next morning, they're up, showers, come down around 9.30, we all have breakfast together. They head off around 11am.
I go up to change the bedding as we have other guests due. Pull back the duvet and see a wet patch on the sheet. Pull off the sheet, the wet patch is through to the mattress. It's jizz. No doubt.
So, AIBU to think that's a bit rank? Or am I being fusty and should be a bit more chill? I don't care about the sexy time, do what you like, but clear it up. 'Finish' so it's tidy iyswim. We're likely to have them round again at some point but there's no way I'm letting them stay, is that mean? Obviously, if they asked, I'd have to say 'you know, my cleaning up jizz days are behind me and probably in front of me with a boy in the house so no thanks. Go do that in the taxi home and receive the bill instead.'

OP posts:
Sweetpeasaremadeforbees · 05/05/2022 16:08

Get a grip. Some bodily fluid on sheets... In the machine, forget. Next.

Wow your washing machine must be massive to fit a mattress in. I can't believe that so many people are fine with this. Anyone who thought it was fine to basically leave a wank stain for their hosts to deal with wouldn't be staying with me again (and if they asked I'd be telling them why not).

ethelredonagoodday · 05/05/2022 16:08

tanstaafl · 05/05/2022 16:01

Was there a beaker on the bedside cabinet too?

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 😂

ethelredonagoodday · 05/05/2022 16:10

As others have said, it's not the best, but I couldn't get het up about it. But I do have covers on all our mattresses.

HellyR · 05/05/2022 16:11

If it was just on the sheets that's grim enough but at least they can be washed.

What do you do about a mattress that you can't chuck in a machine? Definitely get a mattress protector OP but even those aren't all waterproof.

Presume all the 'NBD' people would be ok sleeping on a mattress with dried up strangers' spunk in it? Not sure I would... at least not knowingly...

Original poster
WorkingOnItWhateverItIs · 05/05/2022 16:11

I shall invest in a mattress protector for future guests, noted!
I get it's 'just' bodily fluids, but they're not mine or my immediate family's and I'm not a hotel (not that I'd leave a generous dollop of fresh jizz for someone to find on a hotel sheet).
For the PP who asked, we've only recently become friends through a mutual hobby type thing, all get on etc. Wonder if they see us as their parents sort of age and we'll just tidy up after them.

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 05/05/2022 16:15

Why couldn't they have cleaned with some loo roll or tissues rather than leak onto the bed? Sleeping in a wet patch isn't conducive to a good night's sleep.

I wouldn't be OK with this either.8

Xmasbaby11 · 05/05/2022 16:15

Yeah it's careless of them not to have thought to attempt to clean up or at least strip the bed themselves.

Definitely a mattress protector for the spare bed in future and ask guests to remove the sheets so you don't need to see the state of them. Give them a laundry basket and shove the sheets straight in the machine. You don't have to let them stay again if you don't want to; I don't think it's for anyone else to decide that.

RampantIvy · 05/05/2022 16:16

Not sure where the 8 came from.

Squiff70 · 05/05/2022 16:19

I can't get over how many people think this is acceptable and that the OP should just wash the sheets, scrub the mattress (and pay for specific products in order to do it) and move the hell on.

It's VILE. I honestly don't see why people would even need to have sex when staying in another person's home for one night. I'm no prude AT ALL but it's disrespectful for this very reason.

The ages here are irrelevant. The people who stayed were in their 20s. Grown adults who should know better. Finding jizz on the sheets when you'd had the grace to put them up for the night at their request as as bad as finding shit stains on the bed (unless said guest has a problem with continence). No need for it at all.

OP, YANBU!

BackflandedCondiment · 05/05/2022 16:19

It's the kind of thing that never would have occured to me to worry about in my 20s (especially early 20s) - either as the offender or the host - but that I would consider rude in my 40s and not cream of doing if I stayed at someone's house for the night.

BackflandedCondiment · 05/05/2022 16:20

DREAM!!! (not cream Blush)

Hadjab · 05/05/2022 16:20

PoseyFlump · 05/05/2022 15:22

Why should the op get a mattress protector for doing them a one night favour? She wasn't getting paid bed and board. Inconsiderate, rude twats.

Umm, do you not have mattress protectors on your own beds? To protect from all bodily fluids, not just sexy time ones?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 05/05/2022 16:21

I get it's 'just' bodily fluids, but they're not mine or my immediate family's

So it would be alright for a sibling to leave some stains on the bedding but not a friend you invited to stay over?

Get a grip, Just sling in the linen in the wash and get a mattress protector. The fact you don't have one already means you're a bit in the wrong.

iggybop · 05/05/2022 16:22

What would have expected them to do? Wash the sheet?

OfstedOffred · 05/05/2022 16:22

Yeah minging.

If you are doing it properly it's not meant to end up all over the bed. It's not hard to have tissues to hand.

You do what you want in your own bed but you don't do that as a guest.

2bazookas · 05/05/2022 16:25

Because mattress protectors on every bed are a standard part of essential domestic hygeine. Like lavatory brushes, and soap.

RampantIvy · 05/05/2022 16:26

iggybop · 05/05/2022 16:22

What would have expected them to do? Wash the sheet?

Use tissues to catch the leakage. It isn't difficult.

catscatscatseverywhere · 05/05/2022 16:26

Don't let them stay overnight at your house anymore. It's gross.

dudsville · 05/05/2022 16:28

This might be a lesson learned for your guests, it certainly can be a lesson learned for you. Mattress protectors are necessary, and bedlinens should never be examined.

CounsellorTroi · 05/05/2022 16:29

ImplementingTheDennisSystem · 05/05/2022 14:53

Grim. DH and I have stayed over at various friends' houses and never once had sex, no matter how drunk we've been. It's so unnecessary! They've not done anything wrong of course, but it's a bit cringe.

This. Having sex when you’re a guest at someone else’s house is rank.

SarahSissions · 05/05/2022 16:29

That’s grim. If your staying as a guest you bundle the sheets and strip the bed anyway when you leave - you’re not a maid.

but i would’ve expected you to have a mattress protector anyway

MardyOldGoth · 05/05/2022 16:30

Gross and disrespectful. YANBU.

Trivester · 05/05/2022 16:31

Ugh. It’s like finding an unflushed toilet, or urine splatters on the floor. It’s just basic manners to clean up after yourself.

I have mattress protectors on my sheets and I would still be grossed out by that. I don’t mind my guests having sex. It’s grim cleaning up after them.

I think yabu if you plan on cleaning up after your ds though! Make it clear the first time that it’s not on and let him figure out a discreet solution.

LoveSpringDaffs · 05/05/2022 16:32

@HellyR

Presume all the 'NBD' people would be ok sleeping on a mattress with dried up strangers' spunk in it? Not sure I would... at least not knowingly

presumably you stay at hotels/b&b/etc...

you don't think others have had sex on the bed??

why should house guests expect no one to have had sex in/on the bed previously??

weird.

LightEveningsAreBack · 05/05/2022 16:33

How do you know it's the man and not the lady? Surely if it's on the bed it'd be her not the man's fluid everywhere 🕵‍♂️, they must have forgotten to pack the sex towel 😆.

Personally I'd have a proper mattress protector on a guest bed if various people are staying over and I wouldn't be inspecting the sheets before I wash them, I'd bundle them up and put them on a hot wash, like I assume most people would. If I was the couple I'd have removed the sheets and offered to put them in the wash myself to save my blushes.