Mummy look at those slags....

[Feckingfeck]

DS2 is 3, he can't pronounce "f" it comes out as an "s"

When walking today to collect DS1 from school we walked past some bunting (flags) and a group of ladies were stood underneath....

"Mummy, look at those slags"

Mortified.

Amongst his other finest moments are running alongside a man in a mobility scooter miming driving and shouting "beep, beep"

AIBU to think my child was born to embarrass me 😂

What words do children you know say that sound like something else?

What have your DC done that have embarrassed you?

Make me laugh to forget my own embarrassment 🙈

When my DS was a toddler, we often encountered a horrible man and his equally horrible dog out walking and avoided them at all costs. The dg had chased and attacked both our dogs on various occasions and DH and I had what we thought was a private nickname for the pair of them. DS and I were out on a walk one day. He ran slightly ahead of me, looked around a bend in the path, and absolutely bellowed, 'Mummy! Gitface and Vile Toby are coming!' 😳

Oh and same DC at about the same age went through a brief period where he randomly switched to calling his dad “Man”. He REALLY likes swimming, and never wants to leave the pool. DH recounted once having to carry him, kicking and screaming out of the pool, with DS shouting “No man! Don’t take me! I don’t want to go man! Man! Put me back!”

Whenever my friend would come shopping with myself and DS, then about 2, she would always takeover the pushchair. In Tesco's once and DS was walking beside the pushchair and she's pushing it, DS spots the sanitary towels and runs to them shouting "mummy's nappies"........loudly......repeatedly. I dodged behind some shelves so anyone looking thought he was hers 😀

All mine pronounced spaghetti as pasghetti, so DH and I out, ALONE, to dinner one night, waitress taking the order and I said to DH "ohhh you like the pasghetti here" 😳She just looked at me with pity and said "Kids?"
Without even looking up DH goes "No kids, definitely no kids on this menu"

They must have felt sorry for us they gave us a bottle of wine on the house 😝

BoredZelda · 05/05/2022 10:53
@Chooksnroses
No need for personal attacks. I’d have thought it entirely appropriate to teach a boy that telling a woman he likes their breasts isn’t funny and not to do it.

@BoredZelda I'm sorry! You're righ@Chooksnroses😚

Sorry, you're right, of course.

My little brother 4 in the back of my dads car when we stopped at the petrol station. DF leans in to get money for fuel
DB: Fffff, ffffff, ffffff
DF: Ffffff-indlay (db name)
DB: Fffffff-UCKKKK

DF had no one else to blame

We also had the clock issue. The worst was when we went to visit a friend of DH who owned a grandfather clock.
She was about 2 and practically shrieked "Daddy your friend has a big cock."
Even worse was she kept telling everyone about it, her grandparents, nursery. I was mortified and we didn't visit that friend again until she could say clock (even though he thought it was hilarious)!

I was on a bus with DD aged 3. She liked looking at the priority seat poster as I was pregnant at the time. She always pointed at the picture of the pregnant lady and said 'look it's mummy'. Anyway, a man with a walking stick got on, and she pointed at him and said very loudly 'look, it's the man from the poster'

My son's first word was 'cock'... I'm not sure if that counts but I thankfully have it immortalised on video! I look forward to his 18th in 9 years' time.... 😁

My parents always watched war films and documentaries.
As a child in the 70's you just watched whatever your parents did.
Got my own back at the seaside when I saw a group of hells' angels.
I started shouting 'nazis' at the top of my voice. Never saw my parents move so fast 😁

My late MIL was trying to be tactful about explaining her dog had died and told the children he had gone to heaven. DS, about 3, said, "When you're dead you're dead. You don't do nuffing, you don't go nowhere. When you're dead you're dead and that's it." Stunned silence and MIL shuffled off.

I was only glad that he hadn't announced it at mass on Sunday. Not sure how our priest would have dealt with that very emphatic announcement.

Not a baby but my 65 year ild father...

When cocomelon came on

"Oh no, not that coco-milf again!"

😂

No idea cocomelon was so desirable

New favourite. This is the thread that keeps giving!

The "Daddy" comments just reminded me.....
DS aged 3 who used to wail loudly "Daddy! Daddy! Come back! " at any hearse that he saw passing. (ExH used to drive them)
On more than one occasion I had some pitying or sympathetic looks ...wasn't really helped by the fact that our nearest shops had a busy funeral director nearby so was a far more frequent occurrence than it should have been!

My son likes the Stick Man book, but pronounces it Sh*t Man. "Sh.t Man, Sh.t Man oh beware of the dog"... 🐕😂

Sometimes I just want to die.

My son has been enjoying spelling and I try very hard not to swear around him, of course he hears it sometimes but not that much. So when he was walking around asda saying 'nob is spelt N O B' it took me by surprise 😅

When my DS was 2 he used to shout “dick dick” rapturously round the park collecting sticks. I also taught him to blow out dandelion clocks except he thought dandelions are called Daddy-lions so he’d tell me he’d found a daddy-lion cock in the garden.
Also mispronounced chocolate as cock-let…

Cock-let 😂 it has now been renamed!

Thanks 😉

My then 8 year old really wanted to order his own drink at our local Carvery once , warned me in advance not to order for him as he wanted to do it himself so we went round the table
" Diet Coke please " "fruit shoot please "
Normal coke please " Adam's turn " may I have a V05 please "

We all roared cause the poor thing wanted a J20

My little one loves seeing the fuckodiles when we go to the zoo. Can't say his 'cro' sound..

My son thinks people can't hear him if they are more than 1 metre away. We bumped into someone I know and had to stop and make meaningless conversation for a while. As she turned to walk off DS chirps up with
'Oh good, that woman has FINALLY stopped talking to us.'

When my DS was little he would say the word 'pish' for wee, as that was the sound wee makes!
So we'd be out and about and he'd always say very loud: 'mummy I need a pish'- which of course sounds just like something else- I would die of embarrassment every time

😂😂😂😂

There really is no way of disguising that is there?

I’m sometimes reminded that when I was very small and encountered a man with an eyepatch I pointed and exclaimed “look! A pirate!” My poor, poor parents.