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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think male violence will never end?

672 replies

YouAreNotBatman · 04/05/2022 15:26

I was reading the news about 14 year old boy raping and killing a 10 year old girl and I just became so tired.
So tired of endless violence boys and men do to girls and women.
And how they don’t care, they seem to think it’s funny or get angry at any woman who try and speak about it.

OP posts:
leadmeaway · 04/05/2022 22:05

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:04

It wasn’t my statement, it was yours! Are you ok?

Why are you okay? do you need a drop of wine.

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:05

@Pumperthepumper the idea that in that kind of situation, the weaker partner dies.

Now I don't mean that women arent strong.

But what Truth is getting at and what I can see is there wouldn't be such a disparity if there wasn't such a disparity in strength of the sexes (which you cant blame men for).

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:06

leadmeaway · 04/05/2022 22:05

Why are you okay? do you need a drop of wine.

I don’t drink. Time to step away now.

MissChanandlerBong80 · 04/05/2022 22:06

I don't think misogyny is the answer because lesbian relationships have the most violence of all.

Really? Is that true?

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:06

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:05

@Pumperthepumper the idea that in that kind of situation, the weaker partner dies.

Now I don't mean that women arent strong.

But what Truth is getting at and what I can see is there wouldn't be such a disparity if there wasn't such a disparity in strength of the sexes (which you cant blame men for).

So they’re killing by accident?

TruthHertz · 04/05/2022 22:08

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:05

So men are doing it by accident? Like they don’t know their own strength?

A punch from a man can easy kill a woman (or another man). The reverse is not true.

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:08

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:05

So men are doing it by accident? Like they don’t know their own strength?

In sexual crimes, it's not unheard of. Men often panic following a rape or an assault (not that im excusing that, btw) and the kill is accidental.

Or it's a push or a shove (again not excusing it) which gets out of hand.

Or as Truth is getting at, its a mutually abusive relationship.

Im not excusing a single crime against anyone. I'm not denying theres a problem with violence against women.

I just think its a deeper argument than MEN ARE BAD.

Btw Pumper, can I have a wine since it's going? We are growing on each other now, I think.

The irony of all of this is that we would probably all agree on many things. Emotive issue though.

leadmeaway · 04/05/2022 22:08

@Pumperthepumper Back on topic, I was just casually asking are you including transgender women in your claim about male violence? or do you agree they will rightfully come under female violence.

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:09

TruthHertz · 04/05/2022 22:08

A punch from a man can easy kill a woman (or another man). The reverse is not true.

look at how common one punch killers are.

brookstar · 04/05/2022 22:09

Ah, but its OK for women to be mentally abusive because thats not as bad as rape and murder

Well obviously mental abuse is horrific but is it as bad as murder?
I mean it's not a game of DV top trumps but the fact my mums boyfriend mentally abused her was nothing compared to the fact he ended up fucking murdering her! So yes,if we're going to start ranking DV the rape and murder is worse and I know that because I've lived through it.

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:09

leadmeaway · 04/05/2022 22:08

@Pumperthepumper Back on topic, I was just casually asking are you including transgender women in your claim about male violence? or do you agree they will rightfully come under female violence.

I am as pro trans as they come but I would count that as male violence, due to the strength of the male.

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:10

brookstar · 04/05/2022 22:09

Ah, but its OK for women to be mentally abusive because thats not as bad as rape and murder

Well obviously mental abuse is horrific but is it as bad as murder?
I mean it's not a game of DV top trumps but the fact my mums boyfriend mentally abused her was nothing compared to the fact he ended up fucking murdering her! So yes,if we're going to start ranking DV the rape and murder is worse and I know that because I've lived through it.

ah, I'm sorry brooks. <3

Debates aside for this post. I am truly, truly sorry. I cannot even begin to imagine.

HMSSophia · 04/05/2022 22:12

Jesus fucking Christ what an appalling thread. Apologists for male violence make me sick

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:12

TruthHertz · 04/05/2022 22:08

A punch from a man can easy kill a woman (or another man). The reverse is not true.

So, two women a week are being killed by accident? Because men don’t know their own strength?

brookstar · 04/05/2022 22:12

Debates aside for this post. I am truly, truly sorry. I cannot even begin to imagine

Thank you.

TruthHertz · 04/05/2022 22:13

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:03

But women are predominantly the victims because males are (usually) stronger, more powerful, and (althouhg I've argued black is white that women can rape), it's easier for them to do so.

If both sexes could, and were biologically matched, I'm not sure there would be such a discrepancy.

Agreed.

When women commit almost as much DV, but cause far fewer deaths, then there has to be a reason.

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:13

leadmeaway · 04/05/2022 22:08

@Pumperthepumper Back on topic, I was just casually asking are you including transgender women in your claim about male violence? or do you agree they will rightfully come under female violence.

No, that would still be male violence due to their biology. Why?

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:14

HMSSophia · 04/05/2022 22:12

Jesus fucking Christ what an appalling thread. Apologists for male violence make me sick

Good job no-ones doing that then.

Thanks for your input though.

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:14

TruthHertz · 04/05/2022 22:13

Agreed.

When women commit almost as much DV, but cause far fewer deaths, then there has to be a reason.

If they’re equally violent, why don’t women shoot them or poison them?

Supersee · 04/05/2022 22:15

When women commit almost as much DV, but cause far fewer deaths, then there has to be a reason.

Can you back that up?

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:15

brookstar · 04/05/2022 22:12

Debates aside for this post. I am truly, truly sorry. I cannot even begin to imagine

Thank you.

Thank you for sharing that with us, and I'm so sorry.

YouAreNotBatman · 04/05/2022 22:15

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 21:36

I'm certainly not diminishing female victims.

Part of the reason I am so strong about this is because women are continuing to die while we are continuing to idly talk shite.

If you want to realy tackle the issue, you have to look at the whole picture - men and women have to work together.

Then let’s work together!

Now, what are men doing to help violence againts women / what are they doing to help end male violence?

OP posts:
stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:16

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:14

If they’re equally violent, why don’t women shoot them or poison them?

Because despite the telly and social media hype, the majority of murders are not premeditated.

Supersee · 04/05/2022 22:16

HMSSophia · 04/05/2022 22:12

Jesus fucking Christ what an appalling thread. Apologists for male violence make me sick

It's their testosterone, they can't help it. Poor things.

Pumperthepumper · 04/05/2022 22:16

stopwaitingforpermissiontobeyou · 04/05/2022 22:16

Because despite the telly and social media hype, the majority of murders are not premeditated.

So men are killing accidentally?

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