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Original poster

Is this racist?

582 replies

ToastedWaffle · 03/05/2022 21:51

Okay.... so my ex was over at my house tonight to see our kids (he often does this).

Eldest DC was brushing their teeth whilst the same time trying to ask my ex a question.

Because you couldn't make out the words DC was saying with the toothbrush in their mouth, ex then proceeds to imitate the 'sound' saying something like "wah sah wah ha insert random sound here Are you Chinese or something?"

I've just had my arse handed to me by my ex for pointing out it was casually racist and could he not say things like that.

He has kicked up a massive stink which involved shouting, swearing, in which I asked him to leave. Still, the kids overheard him as he was being deliberately loud in shouting at me.

I'm sat here confused as hell.

OP posts:
Butteryflakycrust83 · 04/05/2022 10:52

I am noping right out of this thread because someone has tried to say you can be racist towards upper middle class people.

LOL OH MUMSNET.

And yes, it was racist and hes a dick.

Katya213 · 04/05/2022 10:55

There is racism in every single race on earth. There is even discrimination amongst animals too, yes, can you believe that? No, I bet you can’t because in most peoples opinion on here, it’s just white people that are racist.

Lunar27 · 04/05/2022 10:55

@Labscollie

I don't know where you're going with this either TBH. I actually agreed with you that reverse racism is still racism. However the effects due to power imbalances are obviously different.

You then quoted the equality act of 2010, which doesn't invalidate anything at all.

Alcibiade · 04/05/2022 10:55

Yes, it is deeply racist. You were right to challenge your ex on this.

Lunar27 · 04/05/2022 10:56

Butteryflakycrust83 · 04/05/2022 10:52

I am noping right out of this thread because someone has tried to say you can be racist towards upper middle class people.

LOL OH MUMSNET.

And yes, it was racist and hes a dick.

Katherine Tate. She's a massive racist mocking the upper middle class 😂

TheOldRazzleDazzle · 04/05/2022 10:58

What an infuriating thread.

No, challenging racism is not virtue signalling (massively abused term).

No, laughing about how Chinese sounds like funny nonsense sounds is not the same as saying ‘excuse my French’ or referring to double Dutch.

No, mocking upper class accents is not racism.

No, this isn’t ok because some people call Liverpudlians scousers or put on a Cockney accent.

No, it doesn’t make it ok to dismiss this because you know somebody non-white who wouldn’t be offended by it.

And what on earth is pick and mix racism?!

Philisophigal · 04/05/2022 10:58

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn at the user's request.

StarDolphins · 04/05/2022 11:00

I wouldn’t get upset about this or think it was racist but I would be upset about swearing/shouting!

Butteryflakycrust83 · 04/05/2022 11:05

Just a reminder to white women in particular, you do NOT get to say if this was racist or not. There have already been posters here who are Asian who have said it is.

Their word trumps yours.

TheOldRazzleDazzle · 04/05/2022 11:07

Katya213 · 04/05/2022 10:55

There is racism in every single race on earth. There is even discrimination amongst animals too, yes, can you believe that? No, I bet you can’t because in most peoples opinion on here, it’s just white people that are racist.

What’s this got to do with the price of fish? Is racism ok or not? Is all discrimination against different groups equal in its impact?

I’d have to say no to both of these.

Indicatrice · 04/05/2022 11:11

I wouldn’t get upset about this or think it was racist

And yet more privilege.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/05/2022 11:11

When I first read this I thought YWBU. I didn't recognise what he said as racist nor would I blink an eye if I heard this being said. And now I've just realised my internalised racist tendencies.

I think things like this are small things we can reflect on and learn from (hopefully).

Indicatrice · 04/05/2022 11:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn at the user's request.

How do you know he doesn't have the skills?

Is this how you excuse all racists - 'oh he didn't know any better' ?

Katya213 · 04/05/2022 11:12

TheOldRazzleDazzle · 04/05/2022 11:07

What’s this got to do with the price of fish? Is racism ok or not? Is all discrimination against different groups equal in its impact?

I’d have to say no to both of these.

Show quote history

Of course you won’t agree because you just want to keep finger pointing at one particular group of people.

ApplesAndChalk · 04/05/2022 11:13

There is racism in every single race on earth. There is even discrimination amongst animals too, yes, can you believe that? No, I bet you can’t because in most peoples opinion on here, it’s just white people that are racist

I think humans should be held to higher standards than animals really.

And his thread shows why casual and overt racism is still alive and well in 2022.

Hallyup89 · 04/05/2022 11:14

No, it's not racist. Don't get so wound up about it. It's people who make an issue out of every little thing that are the biggest issue.

Original poster
ToastedWaffle · 04/05/2022 11:14

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/05/2022 11:11

When I first read this I thought YWBU. I didn't recognise what he said as racist nor would I blink an eye if I heard this being said. And now I've just realised my internalised racist tendencies.

I think things like this are small things we can reflect on and learn from (hopefully).

People who have been subjected to this level of 'banter' are more sensitive to it when they hear it.

Thank you for showing understanding. I know if my kids said it at school I'd be called in for a discussion by the head. They need to learn it's not okay.

OP posts:
OneTC · 04/05/2022 11:15

Katherine Tate

Didn't she used to have that "dirty bastards" sketch which was frequently those characters being racist for lols.

vivainsomnia · 04/05/2022 11:16

No, laughing about how Chinese sounds like funny nonsense sounds is not the same as saying ‘excuse my French’ or referring to double Dutch
Not the same how? It is as potentially disrespectful, hurtful, embarrassing, and discriminatory, and inaccurate.

So why is the first so unaccapable but the other two absutely fine?

Butteryflakycrust83 · 04/05/2022 11:20

vivainsomnia · 04/05/2022 11:16

No, laughing about how Chinese sounds like funny nonsense sounds is not the same as saying ‘excuse my French’ or referring to double Dutch
Not the same how? It is as potentially disrespectful, hurtful, embarrassing, and discriminatory, and inaccurate.

So why is the first so unaccapable but the other two absutely fine?

You need it explaining why mocking a chinese accent is different to saying 'excuse my french'?

Original poster
ToastedWaffle · 04/05/2022 11:21

Hallyup89 · 04/05/2022 11:14

No, it's not racist. Don't get so wound up about it. It's people who make an issue out of every little thing that are the biggest issue.

I disagree and by not having these sorts if discussions people will continue to insist "it's not racist. Be quiet. Don't make an issue". How about don't parody a race in a mocking way? Why is up to the offended person to not make a scene and never up to the person making the comment to stop and think for a sec?

OP posts:
vivainsomnia · 04/05/2022 11:25

You need it explaining why mocking a chinese accent is different to saying 'excuse my french'
Do you even understand what 'excuse my French'. It means that French cursing, however bad is standard in the French language and normally used by the French . That's no less insulting than mocking an accent (which almost every foreign person speaking with an accent will tell you they have experienced in some form).

vivainsomnia · 04/05/2022 11:26

You need it explaining why mocking a chinese accent is different to saying 'excuse my french'?
By the way, this very much show how it is all a matter of interpretation and not FACT as one poster is so keen to convince herself.

Butteryflakycrust83 · 04/05/2022 11:28

vivainsomnia · 04/05/2022 11:26

You need it explaining why mocking a chinese accent is different to saying 'excuse my french'?
By the way, this very much show how it is all a matter of interpretation and not FACT as one poster is so keen to convince herself.

You cannot interpret racism.

Its racism, and racist people tying themselves in knows with whataboutery to convince you otherwise.

mustlovegin · 04/05/2022 11:31

They're entitled to their opinions yes, but not their own facts. The fact is that it's racist. There's no getting around that, and I/we won't re-write the facts because these people don't want to face what they are

How can it be a fact when there are different opinions on it? It's ridiculous

I/we won't re-write the facts

Yes, sure...