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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sick to death of online parents' evening

204 replies

noblegiraffe · 30/04/2022 21:33

The Telegraph headline says parents are 'sick to death' of online parents' evening and are desperate to get back to face-to-face meetings.

On here I've read mostly positive comments and how parents never want to go back to sitting in the hall waiting in a massive queue to see the science teacher who always runs over, that it's so much more convenient to sit at home, click through and done. I was quite surprised to see such a strong headline against them.

What do you reckon?

YABU - Would prefer face-to-face

YANBU - Online please

OP posts:
Gloxinia · 30/04/2022 21:36

Well our school had a poll so I know more parents wanted to continue than didn't.

Namechangeforthis88 · 30/04/2022 21:37

YANBU. 40 minute gap between appointments? Tea time!

Runworkeatsleeprepeat · 30/04/2022 21:37

I've got twins so normal parents evening in school filled me with dread as if one ran over then we'd miss the next. This way it doesn't run over and we get the info we need without the stress of previous times. But schools are never going to please everyone!

PenOrPencil · 30/04/2022 21:37

As a parent and a teacher: online all the way! I am so glad both my and my kids’ school kept the online parents eves.
You can still talk to teachers on the phone or ask for an actual meeting if a 5 minute slot is not enough.

Stopsnowing · 30/04/2022 21:38

It was more popular at our school too but personally I find it just very clinical. It is efficient but the slots were too short and it was very impersonal. Yes rushing around is annoying but it also gives you a chance to see the other parents etc.

MrsHamlet · 30/04/2022 21:39

Online all the way. I get to have a wee part way through without scuttling past disapproving parents.

ChicCroissant · 30/04/2022 21:39

I like the online ones - we just sit on the sofa with the laptop in front of us, and the teachers pop up at the right times. It doesn't over-run, and we don't end up running from one end of the school to the other trying to find the right classroom/teacher. There is an online booking system as well.

DD's is online again this year, thankfully! I think it works well for us.

Original poster
noblegiraffe · 30/04/2022 21:40

the slots were too short

Are they shorter than they would be face-to-face?

As a teacher, I find the slots longer because you don't have the bit where you are searching the hall for your next parents, waving them over, shaking hands etc.

OP posts:
Alwayswonderedwhy · 30/04/2022 21:40

Yanbu online is so much easier for parents and teachers.

Candleabra · 30/04/2022 21:41

online Parents evening has been a revelation.
our school never stuck to the timetable so it was always a complete nightmare.
It’s great online. I don’t know any other parents who don’t love it too.
of all the things the telegraph could complain about, they’ve picked the wrong horse here.

iwishiwasonhol · 30/04/2022 21:41

online all the way, no running over no queue jumping , no having to leave work to attend ,pretty sure if there was any major concerns school would contact you any way

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 30/04/2022 21:42

Stopsnowing · 30/04/2022 21:38

It was more popular at our school too but personally I find it just very clinical. It is efficient but the slots were too short and it was very impersonal. Yes rushing around is annoying but it also gives you a chance to see the other parents etc.

Feel free to arrange seeing other parents in your own time anyway, schools don't need to facilitate that.

AskingforaBaskin · 30/04/2022 21:44

YANBU they have been brilliant for us I work from home and asking my boss for 15 mins while me and DH log on was great. It's near impossible for our schedules to allow otherwise.

Also we had to bring our kids now we can Saftley banish them and discuss actual issues with the teachers

BlossomWind · 30/04/2022 21:44

It depends on the school.
DS1 school - you make the appointments, are emailed your schedule automatically, on the evening you click on one link and the teachers pop up when it’s their time, they can see you and you can see them. It’s seamless.
DS2 school - you make the appointments, you have to enter an app and get the schedule emailed to you, on the day you are sent an Excel doc with all the teachers and a link to Google Meet for each one , and also a separate list of teachers who can no longer make it. You have to click on the link for each separate teacher when it is time, first finding them in the Excel document. Nobody is allowed to use their camera.
Obviously prefer DS1 school.
Also we don’t tend to have any issues so far so it tends to be “yes, they are doing fine, next” - if I had more to talk about I would prefer face to face.

BogRollBOGOF · 30/04/2022 21:44

It's much easier to talk face to face, and it's important to meet the humans that teach your child.

It's been horrible the past two years being kept at arms length from the DCs' teachers and its really eroded the school-home relationship. DS has additional needs that affect his communication and organisational skills (tbh, the NT child isn't that much better either) and school's just turned into some place where I send him off for 6 hours a day and constantly asks for stuff from me. The rapport is gone, and that's drained a lot of my good will too. It's just faceless transactions rather than a relationship. That's not what primary was like.

As a secondary teacher, I used to like meeting parents at parents evening and it benefited the relationship between teacher and pupil/ parents. You can't get that through a screen.

JurasicPerks · 30/04/2022 21:45

Secondary: online all the way. Its awesome.

Primary, I'm torn. Books dont come home, its one meeting, I like to get in the school. But it also means childcare isnt an issue, and next week DH can dial in from 200 miles away. He'd have missed it if it was in person.

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 30/04/2022 21:45

I love online from both directions.

I can't get my timings messed up by one parent who just doesn't get the hint to leave. More parents come to the meetings, which means fewer to chase after I've already given up 2 or 3 evenings for them. No one over runs, I have to be very succinct, which probably makes me clearer.

I am able to go to my own child's parents' evening (always held on the same evening as my own school ones, so I missed them), we get both teachers at the same time (job share).

I send work home that I want to discuss.
My own child's books were left in afterschool club so I could have a look on pickup.

BungleandGeorge · 30/04/2022 21:47

They’re ok. The slots are quite short-4 mind and used to be 10 mins f2f. Personally I still like meeting people and interacting and am tired of everything being done through a screen…

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 30/04/2022 21:47

Also we had to bring our kids now we can safely banish them and discuss actual issues with the teachers.

Yes, I agree with that from both sides too. I don't want children (primary) at parents' evenings.

Stopsnowing · 30/04/2022 21:47

What Bogroll said. When I said it was nice seeing the other parents obviously I didn’t mean for a chat. We do that at socials. What I meant was it was chance for parents and the school to come together.

BewareTheBeardedDragon · 30/04/2022 21:48

Online best for me. Much easier with multiple children to juggle.

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 30/04/2022 21:51

What I meant was it was chance for parents and the school to come together.

We've done performances and Easter fairs etc, and I talk to parents at the end of the school day if I need to. I reckon I speak to every parent face to face of the children in my class over the space of a week or so. Some more than others, obviously.

BungleandGeorge · 30/04/2022 21:53

And of course it does rely on both parties having decent IT and broadband. And it can be quite intrusive for both parties to have to do calls at home and I’m not necessarily wanting to discuss my child in a situation that isn’t confidential and I don’t know who is listening

Original poster
noblegiraffe · 30/04/2022 21:55

I’m not necessarily wanting to discuss my child in a situation that isn’t confidential

Parents' evening in the hall certainly isn't confidential. It's so noisy I'm practically shouting at parents to be heard. Are you primary?

OP posts:
BungleandGeorge · 30/04/2022 21:56

RuleWithAWoodenFoot · 30/04/2022 21:51

What I meant was it was chance for parents and the school to come together.

We've done performances and Easter fairs etc, and I talk to parents at the end of the school day if I need to. I reckon I speak to every parent face to face of the children in my class over the space of a week or so. Some more than others, obviously.

I presume you teach primary? Parents evening is pretty much the only time you see secondary teachers! And kids are expected to be on the call too for secondary