Sick to death of online parents' evening

[noblegiraffe]

The Telegraph headline says parents are 'sick to death' of online parents' evening and are desperate to get back to face-to-face meetings.

On here I've read mostly positive comments and how parents never want to go back to sitting in the hall waiting in a massive queue to see the science teacher who always runs over, that it's so much more convenient to sit at home, click through and done. I was quite surprised to see such a strong headline against them.

What do you reckon?

YABU - Would prefer face-to-face

YANBU - Online please

I haven't bothered since it's been online. I'm not good at tech.
Tbh parents evenings are a bit of a waste of time anyway imo.

Yes!! Our school did an online poll last summer asking if parents wanted to go back to face to face and the majority was no. Online is ok, it just would be nicer to be f2f personally.

After a poll one of our schools went back to face to face. Much more logistics required in terms of childcare, work etc. Much prefer online if it’s properly managed (which it was). 10 minute slots

i would like the opportunity once a year to see the classroom my (primary aged) children are in. It helps me visualise where they are much better and I can see work etc. this doesn’t have to be a parents evening though!

@LoveInSlowMotion 10 minutes becomes logistically difficult at secondary. A class of 30 requires 300 minutes, 5 hours, to see everyone. That assumes you only have one class per year too. How does it work for your school?

Maybe the Telegraph represents Independent school parents where they don't have queues and see face to face parent6eve as an opportunity to network???

I’m an independent school parent and we had queues, same as everyone else- why would that be different? Also laughing/cringing at the idea of someone trying to network at parents evening 😂

Online is much better, perhaps with an option to ask for a separate f2f appointment where there’s a problem.

Possibly but some schools are giving more time than others.

Primary school we got 7mins that's not a long time to hear how a child is settling in at school, and how they are going with literacy, numbers and writing.

Someone mentioned getting 10mins per subject in secondary.

We had choice at DD's school and it worked absolutely fine! Picked a day and slot as usual then selected online or face to face. The week before hand they opened the classroom for an hour for a few consecutive days at pick up so that those that had online appointments were able to come in and view their children's work in person and chat to teacher informally then. Online means me and ex DH can easily attend at same time

How does it work for secondary school? Were parents evening the only time parents met the subject teacher? How would you ever know who teachers your kid or what the school looks like?

My kids’ school has gone back to face-to-face. It was nice to see my friends (other parents) in the queues but I’d prefer not to have been queuing for 2 hours after work. I’d have preferred online to stay with tweaks, like including time for questions rather than the teacher being on rapid fire ‘broadcast mode’. An extra minute or time set aside for Q&A would have been ideal.

We are primary and have been face to face all this year. We also went back to playground drop off and pick up as soon as possible because the daily contact is important. Some parents did say they would like online so we may consider a mix in future if it works.

I hope online ones carry on! Our parents "evening" begins at 1pm. The last appointment is 5:30pm. I work until 5pm and have a half an hour commute. It was always a stress trying to book that last appointment, only to sit on a tiny chair in a noisy hall for another half an hour whilst other parents would go on and on and talk well over their appointment time. The last online one I accessed from the comfort of my desk after work, no rush no stress. And it cuts off after 10 minutes, so no waiting around either.

Our school sent out a survey to parents where it was overwhelmingly a vote for online. Our system seems to work well and we have no problem with it. It's easy to use and easy to book appointments for both children in one go so no planning.
I remember the hassle of me running round various teachers at secondary school trying to get appointments all within a reasonable amount of timing so the idea of us now trying to do twins and a much bigger school whose layout we don't know filled me with dread.

Primary face to face I don’t mind. They always run late because there are several parents who take up a lot of extra time but as it’s only one teacher I can cope with that. Secondary however, I had 15 teachers and the throughly of anything over running fills me with dread. Online works well. I’m not late because someone else was late etc. I got what I needed. Much better for us. Appreciate however it does not mean everyone does!

Why don't books come home? We are primary, do online but sends the books home now. (didn't during peak covid). That would be a reasonable thing to request.

Are there no other ways for you get into the school?

We had an online meeting in October and a F2F in February.

October, teacher A drops the bombshell that despite the catalogue of SENs, DS is being taken off the SEN register. He may have caught up on the literacy side but he still needs constant prompting to use his aides, and he's still autistic with SATs and secondary transition to face through the year. This is very difficult to discuss with a computer in 10 minutes.

February, a chance to meet teacher B (DS now on his 10th teacher in the school and has a grand total on 1 school year in 7 not affected by strike, staffing change or lockdowns and that was back in y2). I look through his books and realise that my 11 year old has never done school work in a pen, contrary to the advice from occpational therapy and the professionals who diagnosed him. Being F2F, I've seen a problem and it's much easier to take the lead on my concerns before the teacher can also discuss her agenda. It was a very polite and civilised meeting and we both had opportunity to discuss what we both needed within 10 minutes.

If that parents evening had been online, DS would be going up to secondary never having used a pen for academic work, and not having the opportunity to experiment with pens he can grip, form letters properly with and use with stamina. (He should of course have opportunity to use his computer but that's a whole other rant and not directly linked to Parents Evening)

Online makes it a lot easier for schools to cover up their inadequacies, and to gloss over details they've missed or don't want parents to see. This is a Good school and is actually good in a general sense, but having recieved diagnoses through 2019, a lot has gone out of the window and the only contact the SENCO has had with me in 2 years was a patronising little pack of PECs in June 2020 for my highly articulate child who was more interested in Wuhan lab leaks than needing to know why his school was locked up which we'd covered 3 months earlier. DS does well because he's highly motivated and in a generally good class, not through any great virtue of an individualised approach or bothering to read professional documents about him.

If you'd asked me about the home-school relationship 2.5 years ago it was very different because there was contact and dialogue. It's very difficult to pick that up on the cusp of leaving after so long of being held at bay for half of junior school. There are issues that I've now let slide because it's just late in this round of education, and it's easier to start again at transition (things like computer access that teacher A should have been well aware of as former SENCO, and have not originated from teacher B)

I HATE the online parents evenings with the fire of a thousand suns.

My experience is this is a monologue from teacher who has 6 minutes to tell me about my kids. It has all the perils of zoom meetings with shitty connection, and teachers losing the first 1/6 of the meeting by not being quick enough on the draw. There is no eye contact or proper spacing for non verbal cues to actually make it a conversation.

In our event for my youngest this week I got entirely conflicting reports and strategies for my DC from teachers who provide THE SAME SUBJECT

DD 2 absolutely hates it, she is highly anxious and finds the whole thing incredibly stressful.

And in my experience they all end at 5m44s with 'So Mrs Wazzzzzuuuuuuup, have you got any ques...' and then shuts off.

Just bollocks.

But for those of us who work FT, it's exactly the same as primary.
I didn't see the teacher at primary, I dont see the teachers at secondary.
I do agree that seeing inside the school is nice, and hopefully summer fairs etc can start up soon so this can happen.

Online all the way. As long as the school is using a properly set up IT system like School Cloud then it is seamless.

The main issue with face to face was queue jumpers, appointment hoggers and those who would randomly sit down without appointments. There was almost no way of sticking to your schedule without having a row with a set of parents.

Online is also better for having serious and confidential conversations. Parents feel more comfortable because they are in their homes. And you can arrange follow ups. Parents Evening isn’t the time to go over a serious issue in depth. It means things are getting followed up on subsequent meetings, which is better.

Since we started online parents' evenings, the attendance has been so much better. No worries about babysitters, catching buses, being overwhelmed by the school situation etc. You're talking to parents who feel more relaxed in their own space, and you're not overheard. I've had parents speak to me from their offices, taxis, or even a local park on a break from work! I think that the flexibility suits many. No queuing is a bonus.
If they flag something up, you can arrange a follow up contact.

The last parents evening at the school I used to work at did one day of face to face and one day of online so parents had the choice. Thought that was quite nice

Also, online is better for parents doing shift work. There is a mum I never saw until we switched to online. She did her appointment outside the hospital where she works on her phone. Otherwise o can never get hold of her.

We can also dial in two people at once, which means I get a lot of divorced parents turning up together to do the appointments- I suppose easier to see people online than face to face.

How did the teachers have time to do that?
How does the school manage that in the daytime - are students sent home?

My DCs’ primary school has a different parents evening day for kids on the SEN register with longer appointments if necessary which means that they don’t overrun and mess up the schedule for other evenings with a tighter turnaround.

Those saying the ten minutes aren’t enough - it might be worth making as a suggestion to the school?

That's a good point, @Legrandsophie - seeing two at once in different windows. Divorced or at two different workplaces.

This, broadly.