Comment after oral sex (this may be TMI for some ppl)

[Limebazil]

I am seeing a guy the last few weeks we are both early 30s. He seems like a nice guy, and things were going great. Last night we slept together for the first time, it was great he was very generous in bed but after he had gone down on me he said "I think you should drink more water you taste kind of strong". This was really hurtful to me, I'm sure he didn't mean it to be hurtful and maybe I'm overly sensitive but why would you say that when it is widely known that women/ girls are paranoid about how they look/ smell/ taste down there. He's not a gynaecologist so the health advice was not appreciated. He could see he had upset me and tried to back track saying "he didn't mean it like that" and "I'm crazy about you the last thing I want to do is offend you I was just trying to help" but now I'm just seeing it as a red flag. AIBU?

With advice like that, thank god you are an ex-professional!

Good for you op!

How would you ladies like it if a bloke after the first time you had sex with said, lot of cellulite on that arse of yours. It’s not fine. It’s rude. It’s exactly why the OP is right to question him on it. Women taste different. My partner, will say, you taste lovely tonight, another time he won’t say anything. As long as I’m hygienic and clean then that’s it. Not a lot we can do about the taste. Some of the comments on here explain why companies are making a fortune out of smelly sanitary products etc and women’s insecurities.

‘Schedule oral sex?’ And that’s some planning! 😂

Eurgh yes- good guy and nice guy are massive red flags. Those who genuinely are good people don't waffle on about it do they or try and coerce you into stuff because ah they're just so nice.

Hope you're okay this morning OP, lots of respect for you showing respect for yourself and rightly blocking him.

I'd say he has watched too much porn and has unrealistic expectations of a normal body. What did he expect you to taste of? Salted caramel? Vanilla praline?

Such a negative comment after your first time together would be a massive red flag for me. If he can't be nice in the afterglow of that I would anticipate he will always be critical and negative. I would block and move on.

Oh dear God 😂

Op, I'm sorry this has happened to you.

As for blocking his emails, I'm not sure if you can, but you can certainly mark them as SPAM and won't have to look at any more of them.

And yes, you are NOT being unreasonable; it was a rude comment at a very inopportune moment.

It's obviously just a put down, but even if it were true, good manners would mean keeping that little tidbit to himself. If you were eating dinner at someone's home, would you tell them the flavor of the sauce was too strong and suggest they add more water? If someone told me that it would be the last time I cooked for them!

FFS.

Thanks ladies. I'm totally fine, a bit disappointed that I've wasted almost 2 months on someone who was not worth my time but good to now that my dickhead radar is working.

*know

Why is that a red flag?you smell strong he called you out on it in a imo normal way
He obvs wants to go down on you again in the future.
Id just drink more water or whatever and see if it makes a change.

Plus the people advising to sniff??? What the f is that going to achieve. Sniffing a vagina isn't the same as tasting what a vagina taste like.

So there really is only one way to know if you taste strong op....

Ps just because no one has ever told you so you might smell strong doesnt mean no one has ever thought the same
You would really call out a guy on have strong flavourd cum no would ya. Haha but you'd be thinking it though haha

Well it was a red flag to me and I was 100% right because he turned into an abusive arsehole when I ended the relationship. Thank god I didn't listen to advice like this and ignore my instincts.

Ladies if a guy says something that makes you feel uncomfortable, trust your instincts.

Imagine how well it would go down if a woman said to a man his penis tastes too strong and perhaps he should consider doing x, y or z. Probably not well. I agree these things in loving relationship should be discussed sensitively as part of a healthy sex life, but after the first time sleeping together when it was actually probably at least partly his semen he was tasting- no.

Seriously OP, good on you for listening to your instincts!

He didn’t say she smelt. He said she tasted strong. It was probably his sperm mixed with her juices. Well done OP. It’s men like him that make women want to spend a fortune on vagina deodorants and wipes.

Why is that a red flag?you smell strong he called you out on it in a imo normal way

RTFT and in future set a higher bar for yourself.

Any man who says that whilst you’re being intimate, especially the first time, is not a good person. Which OP fortunately found out sooner rather than later.

What a vile prick. Good for you for trusting yourself.
I’m just wondering, looking back now is there anything your ignored / sensed in him prior to that event? Or did he appear pretty decent?
I’m really trying to learn to pick up on red flags and listen to them.
It’s a shame there isn’t a register for guys like this.

he went down there at his own peril…unless really stupid he should have know it wouldn’t be the same as if you’d just stepped out of the shower. Then to try and locate the ‘problem’ within you really reflects his misongony and desire to try and take you down a peg or two like you say. You sound a confident woman and some men cannot abide that and will seek to dismantle that confidence.

what a fucking fool.

great work OP picking up on this when you did and acting on it inspite of what some earlier posters were saying to you. I guess they won’t there to feel the vibes though, you were and they weren’t good.

Yes we all have different scents and some stronger than others.
However here you said he went down on you some hours after you had had sex together without a condom.
It is pretty obvious with the mixture of both your bodily fluids things were not going to be that fresh down there. I would have pointed this out following his comment and it was his stale juices mixed in contributing to the strong aroma.

My 5 year old keeps asking what I'm laughing at

My 5 year old keeps asking what I'm laughing at

Well done for correctly identifying a wrong in op.

Homework for all those that said he must be nice, normal and op was overreacting: raise your fucking boundaries and until you do refrain from giving advice till you've learned how not to be a dick pandering handmaid.

Stay safe op and bask in the glory of being right and having a good creepdar.

Good call OP!