Do I deserve this? I'm banned from Marks and Spencers nationally!

[kandymouse]

I went shopping at my local M&S. I got some milk, bread, eggs etc.. of course with my buggy. I pay then I go out of the store..then a man comes and wants to come to their security office. Then I look down on my buggy and realize that there is a magazine that I forgot to pay for so then I apologize and ask him if he called me in for that. And there is him and another woman and a man (three people).. and he says that from now on I'm banned from M & S nationwide. They also call the police so they come down to the office and they tell M & S they can't put me on a criminal charge and just takes my name address and phone number. I thought this was a bit much. I'm extremely upset and I don't know what to do. Now they made me leave the shop with letter that I'm banned nationally from all M&S.

I have done this many times too, and I agree with clayre, there needs to be somewhere safe to put buggies if they want us to use trollies as there is no way I would transfer all the stuff I carted about in it just to g in and buy a few bits n bobs, and perching a basket on the handlebars doesn't help much either!
Never been caught though and was actually praised by one manager for being so honest (that was ds's fault for lifting something and I didn't notice till much later
Apparently I was then only one ever to come back and return anythiing!

I wuld've been mortified too, though, but undesirables do use their kids as excuses because it is so easily done by the rest of us.

Fucking appalling
Once in Waitrose I hung a bread roll off the buggy handle, the rest of my shopping on the buggy hood.
Paid for at all, was walking out when I spied the bun and went back to pay for it.
The lady on the enquiries, thanked me and said don't worry, take it for nothing...

I have worked in many shops and this is a pretty standard procedure I am afraid.

Shops are robbed blind and your excuse is the standard excuse. (not saying that you did it intentionally).

lo piffle
same thing happened to me with an orange

just adding my tale to the list...when pregnant with my dd I walked into my local Boots store, did all the shopping with my 18 month old ds in buggy and picked up a packet of pampers nappies - you know, the very large packs with a plastic hook on, and having nowhere to put it in the basket, I hooked it onto the buggy and walked merrily through the till paying for everything else, forgetting nappies!! Didnt realise until I was in newagents and saw the nappies and felt the earth swallow me up!!! ran back into Boots and apologised to lady at the till who let me pay for nappies. I wanted to say, I agree with many other posts on here, it is SO easily done, and I can also see why the magazine might not be put in the basket as I often dont put my newspaper/mag in with things that will leak on them or damage them, so I often tuck them under buggy where it will stay dry or unsquashed. (until I get them home where my kids promptly spill juice on them or shred them up to make something!! )

Sorry to hyjack, gr1973, Just wondering, do they share pics of suspects as well as those who've actually been caught?

I've beed treated vv suspiciously in my local waitrose, i was basically singled out, glared at and overtly watched. Needless to say, I was furious and complained to the area manager. The matter was dealt with, bit it was weird that I was singled out like that, I was treated appaulingly from the moment I entered the store.

i once knew a family with a 16 year-old daughter with a syndrome i can't recall the name of. she was not NT but physically a-okay, and the mother (who was partially sighted and used a stick) got her a coat with poacher's pockets and did some shopping while directing dd what to nick. she was caught a few times but the daughter just used to fake a temper fit on the floor while the mother would righteously say she hadn't seen it, until the supermarkets would beg them to leave.

we had to look after the dd at school, and she would moan if she didn't have her shoplifting jacket on, as it made things more difficult for her.

I think it was an overreaction by M&S. If you had bought £8 worth of shopping and had a £25 scarf hidden in the buggy, then it would have looked a bit more suspicious.

I would write to head office and ask them to overturn the ban as it was an honest mistake made whilst you were distracted with a child and a buggy.

(My brother used to work in M&S and they had photos of people who weren't allowed in.)

DS3 nicked a hoooj bright pink bra from Evans. We set the alarms off as we went out the door, he was in buggy clutching it and grinning. He was very upset when I gave it back.

Yes I think M&S were over-reacting. IN general, though, there has been a slow climate shift over the past 10 years to treating everyone as though they are a potential criminal. This is the most lasting lega y of the Blair government: inducing more and more fear and suspicion in order to snoop into every aspect of people's lives.

MegaLaugh MegaLegs!!!

but if they blindly believed everyone that said "it's an easy mistake to make" half their stock would fly out of the door. unfortunately women are far more prolific shop lifters than men, and putting things on the buggy is so common that of course someone putting something on a buggy and not paying for it is suspicious.

what would people have security do? or would people prefer shops didn't have security at all? how are they supposed to tell the difference between the genuine shoplifter with a buggy who says "it's so easily done" and the mum who made an honest mistake?

I don't think they took my photo...unless they took it with security camera or something. They took my name address and copy of my receipt for the magazine after I've paid for it. I do feel extremely bad that it happened, and I will never forget to pay for items again and check meticulously what I've got in the store. I understand that they were doing their job, but at the same time I wished that they would have really listened and understood where I was coming from. But then that might be too much to ask from M&S. Do you want to know which magazine it was? Psychologies!! and in the front it says 'Everything happens for a reason'. So I will try to be law abiding citizen and avoid M&S (as they want me to) and maybe write to them in two months time or so.

My mother once walked past the security men out of the door of Carlisle M&S with a wire basket in her hands full of food. She was half way up the main street when she realised and went back. They were lovely about it. Sounds like a massive over-reaction if you are banned from all stores over a tub of margarine.

yuckihatecheesestrings - they would only share photo's of people being caught. most town centres have a kind of shared security thing where they share pictures and there are some national schemes too. M&S for example, will share stills from their security cameras. In fact, when I worked in retail then M&S would be one of the biggest providers of photo's. People who worked on the 'shop floor' wouldn't necessarily be aware of these. Data protection laws etc mean that stores/centres with access to such images have to be quite careful. Cant remember the final details as have changed career since then but I had to sign a confidentiality thing because I had access to such images.

Also just to add, as much as it is very easy for people with buggies to accidentally take things the use of prams/babies/small children to aid in shoplifting is frighteningly widespread. Any honest citizen would be amazed at the literally £100's of pounds worth of stuff you can hide in a buggy if you know what you are doing.

God got 2 pairs of kids trousers and a jumper from John Lewis like this once - idiot that I am took them back the next day and paid for them though - just in case!

Think it is a major over reaction though and if I were you I would definitely appeal.

Wannabe: frankly I think that where there is reasonable doubt (as there obviously is in this case) the person should be made to pay for the item and the matter left there. WHatever happened to the fundamental principle of innocent until proved guilty?

We issue banning notices to shoplifters as its the only way to get a result. If someone under a banning notice steals from us again (and they do) then they can be arrested for trespass. The CPS will actually act on trespass cases whilst shoplifting cases rarely result in any real deterant and precious little money back for the stolen goods.

Our local CSO says that the average cycle from a shoplifter getting 3 penalty notices to actually getting any form of custodial sentance is 18 months. Most of our shoplifters are drug related and they come in day after day and just don't fear penalty notices.

Anyway, that's probably why they banned you, they won't waste their own time on penalty notices for shoplifting, just ban - catch again - prosecute for trespass with intent. I'm sure it wasn't anything personal, it's just what retailers have to do to have any way of getting money back.

Ooh M&S Loooove me. When I was about 19 and my boyfriend was 17, we went into the changing rooms together as he was helping me with my bra fitting - he and I were really close about that sort of thing. Nothing naughty going on but some old bird decided to throw open the curtain and demand that he wait outside.

It was shit. He went out and waited for me till I ws dressed, then as we were leaving the shop he suddenly had an immature moment and grabbed a handful of granny skirts, lobbed them into the changing rooms and ran like heck!

I was mortified and had to run as well or I think I'd have been joining all the other miscreants in the M&S dungeon (next floor up in the multistorey I think)

God I'm always nearly always doing things like that, what mother isn't.

To be frank the way m&s is so badly designed(like a jumble sale, packing everything sooo closely together) it's very easy to get flustered when paying especially after queuing for ages (always in m&s)while keeping dc quiet.

Think I'll be avoiding m&s for a while.

ds half-inched whole tray of chewing gum from Sainsbury's once. I didn't notice until half way home when I happened to look down into the buggy and saw him proudly hugging it on his lap. Clearly a Bad Mother who was not paying attention. He must have reached over while I was paying.

Thing is, we'd passed dozens of people walking in the opposite direction by the time I realised. And I don't even like blasted chewing gum!

good point Milamae, M&S do pack their rails full, it's really hard to pull out the right size - would be very easy to end up with a spare hanger onto a buggy.

Madamez, I agree with you. If someone presents a plausible explanation (as this clearly was) and they have no evidence to support the idea that the person is a shoplifter, then to react as M&S did in this case is unreasonable, no question.

Of course shoplifting is a major problem - it drives up the price of goods, apart from anything else, but it is NOT and should NEVER be accepted as an excuse for such appalling treatment of an honest customer. I also agree when you say it is the legacy of the Blair years (and, until his actions prove otherwise, the Brown years too) and the shift to a place where we all have to prove that we are innocent and have nothing to hide.

I accidentally took a handbag from M&S once. Had a few bits in the trolley and when I went to pay I forgot to put the bags through - just saw it next to my handbag and my pregnant brain just equated the handbag in my trolley with not being shopping! Realised when I was loading my car and went back to pay. The cashier kept going on about how honest I was . It is an easy mistake to make. I sometimes put shopping on top of the 'hood' of the buggy (but not in the basket underneath) but it would be easy to accidentally leave something there. I am sure that there are many out there who do this on purpose and as another poster pointed out, use their children to help them steal but it does sound like a real over-reaction in your case. It can't have been a very nice experience.