To not know what to do?

[QuestionableMouse]

Have a MA graduation ceremony coming up. It finishes at 2:15. I usually do school pick ups for my sister which are at 2:35. The uni campus is over an hour away so no chance of being back in time. My sister has just started a new job and can't take time off (it's a very full on role and she's currently training, with no chance to make up the day if she misses it.) Her ex-partner has flat out refused to take any time off. (he's a huge knob in multiple ways!)

No grandparents on their dad's side. My mum and dad are attending with me. (I'm the first person in my family to graduate, let alone do a MA so it's very important to them.)

There's no after school club and the school have been unhelpful. No other family who can help (one auntie who is childless and wouldn't cope with two kids, the other has just had a hip op). Looking at childminders but they're all horribly expensive and tbh none of us can really afford the cost.

The best solution I can come up with is to take them with me to the ceremony. They're great kids (4 & 6) and I trust them to behave but I'm not sure if they'll be allowed in? Have emailed the uni but no response yet! What the hell do I do?

As so many others have already said, you need to stay resolute that this is NOT your problem to fix. You are going to your graduation, so are your parents. They are your sister's children, not yours. You don't need to be in touch with her ex at all (why did you text him if he's an arsehole to you? Just block his number already). You told your sister she will have to make alternative arrangements. A childminder as a one off will be cheaper for her than losing her job.

I'm guessing if Op doesn't sort something then one of her parents will drop out & stay behind to pick up the kids.

I'd be fucked off at that tbh.

Your sister is a cunt. This is not your issue to resolve.

At a push, you could suggest one of your parents leaves the graduation earlier to pick up the children in time, so that he/she is still there some of the time.

I would contact your university. While numbers are always tight, they may be able to help in the circumstances.

Are you serious… I’m a teacher I would struggle not to laugh or be furious teachers aren’t babysitters and we have our own lives and families

Your sister should take a parental day or sick day if she really can't face dealing with it any other way. THIS IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM TO SORT OP!

Honestly it does my Nut when people try to claim that they have kids in school and literally do not know a single other parent

It’s your sister’s problem NOT yours. She will have to pay and find a sitter for the day. Enjoy your graduation!

I would add that no University I know would welcome such young children to a graduation ceremony.

Wrong
Unless you only know very obscure off the beaten track universities

Now - single parents, especially those graduating, are positively welcomed by universities.

This is bonkers and you are contradicting yourself.
Surely you can come up with £40 between you all to pay for a one off childminder.
I don't buy this story. It's being over dramatised.

And that means… their children too!

It’s part of a very long running history of the Op starting threads about her farcically unreasonable family

Is there no creche on the uni campus? Although I agree with PP that it's really your sister's problem, not yours.

Sorry @QuestionableMouse but I think you’re being really unreasonable here. Many people graduating will have had to make tough decisions as to who they can bring and who to exclude. You can’t just expect extra guests to be accommodated because it’s convenient for you.
As PPs have said, this isn’t your problem to solve; you can’t pick up your sister’s kids, so she needs to sort it out. It’s her responsibility, not yours.

Not read all posts but, does your University have a creche facility for the graduation day that you could use?

OP it seems very unfair that you are left to sort this. It is your sister's and her ex's problem to sort.

That being said, I know that you want both your parents to be able to come, maybe ask around on social media to see if anyone of your friends can suggest anything. I know that if you were one of my friends then I would be offering to help.

Not your problem it's YOUR day and you want to, quite rightly, share it with your parents.
Pass the problem back to your sister and refuse to deal with it.
Enjoy yourself and congratulations. 🎓🌮🥂🍾

I have 4 DC who have over their educational careers been in 10+ schools, in 5 countries, over 2 continents.

Every single class has had a WhatsApp group made up of multiple parents who would help in this sort of situation

This ☝️

This is 100% your sister's problem to solve. She may need to call upon a friend, a childminder, a friend, ask the school for some local references she can ask, etc.

She is their parent. You have given her fair warning. She'll have to sort it.

There is your answer then

your dad has to stay at home

youve got no other option.

sorted.

Youir sisters children have at least one schoolfriend; SIS must know at least one other parent in their class. SIs needs to contact another school parent and ask them to have the children after school. For pay if necessary.

It's her responsibility to sort out their care. Not yours.

No, not sorted

OP's dad wants to go to the ceremony - why should he miss out on seeing one daughter graduate because his other daughter won't sort childcare?

You say "you've got no other option" - you realise they're not the OP's kids?? It's up to her sister to find an option.