To think this was rude?

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My friend is expecting her first baby. I spent weeks and weeks knitting baby clothes of every description. We met for a coffee in a very quiet cafe and I handed over the bulging bag excited to give them to her. She grabbed the bag, said thanks and without even looking inside put it on the floor. I was a bit taken aback after all my hard work that she had not even looked inside. I still didn't even when I left.

Very rude. I'd be taking a giant step back from that friendship.

Well as she asked me to knit her everything and I told her on the phone when we arranged the meeting that I had finished lots and would bring them, I think she knew what was in the bag. Plus as I handed it to her I told her.

If be over the moon with any gifts , especially for a newborn !
A thank you costs nothing does it ?
Especially as wool isn't that cheap anymore and you've taken the time to make them.

That makes it even worse then!
I'm sorry she didn't appreciate your gifts

Yabu, she thanked you. As others have said it's awkward getting them out in a cafe and maybe she just wanted to get on with eating and drinking and chat?

I thought my iPad had died!

Of course this was rude! Even if the gifts had been unasked for and unwanted, the effort made should have been acknowledged graciously. As these were items your friend had requested I would expect at least a modest show of interest and enthusiasm.

So you think grabbing the bag, putting in on the floor and "thanks" is enough for 2 months of work which I did as a favour when I work as well as bought all the yarn. So someone gives you a gift to you just say thanks and put it on the floor without even looking at it?

I would say "thanks" if someone opens a door for me, or hands me something or gives me change in a shop. If someone had gone to the trouble of making me something which I asked for I would have least have peeped in the bag and said "oh they look lovely, thanks very much, I will have a good look later"

Op, I would be really hurt by her reaction. I totally get where you’re coming from. I was brought up to thank people meaningfully for even the smallest gift. It’s not what the gift is that matters it’s the kindness and thought that’s gone into the gift that matters. I simple ‘’oh thank you so much!, I won’t open it here, I’ll open it at home when I have time go through them properly” and then follow up with a text or phone call expressing how much you appreciate them. Some people are so lacking in basic manners and social etiquette.

Yes. Once the baby is born I'm sure you'll get a cute piccie of them wearing your knitwear and more thanks. You're overreacting a bit.

I hate opening gifts in front of people...

Have a feeling I might be in the minority here but I don't think the friends response in the cafe was that bad. I recently had a baby and have (been lucky enough to have) received a lot of gifts from friends and family. It can sometimes feel a bit awkward and indulgent opening gifts in front of the person who has gifted them, so often I'll say thank you and follow up with a text later on after I have opened the gift to say thank you again.

I do find it rude however that the friend hasn't followed up since, especially as you say she asked you to hand knit the clothes, and presumably she's had chance to look at them now. Does she perhaps not know how much cost and effort goes into knitting a bags worth of baby clothes? Even so, it's still rude.

I certainly wouldn't be rushing to do anything for her any time soon. That was so rude and uncalled for. Cheeky bitch.

I hate opening gifts in front of people too but I think in this situation I’d at least have had a quick peek inside and definitely would have gone overboard with the appreciation.

She has been rude, there’s no real excuse for her behaviour. You clearly went above and beyond and she’s barely even thanked you. Hopefully when the baby is born she dresses the baby in the clothing and sends you photos or something to make up for it.

Based on what you've said OP, I wonder if she feels awkward / embarrassed about her finances and "not being able to afford" baby clothes? Could she have felt embarrassed at being reminded how skint she is, or worried other people might overhear or judge? Perhaps she felt embarrassed receiving the clothes in a public place.

I still think thanks and dropping the bag on the floor was rude. And yes the bag was snatched and dropped on the floor and not a word when I was leaving nor since. People can make as many excuses as they like but good manners cost nothing.

Oh my gosh… that’s so rude!! All that time and effort planning, picking, knitting, sewing up and making it presentable. That’s not nice. What an anticlimax for you as I bet you weee excited to see her happiness upon opening them with all the compliments towards your knitting. It’s happened to me in the past. My partner gave a gift on my behalf and I never heard back. It made me feel embarrassed. Maybe they considered my knitted bits old fashioned when in fact they were modern and good quality bits I would have loved myself. Just learn that some people just don’t value the same things as us and try and be more selective with who you dedicate your hard work and time to.

The exact opposite happened with another friend. I made her curtains and pressed them an carried them carefully over my arms so they would not crease. She took them from me in the same way I was carrying them, kissed me on the cheek and said "thank you so much, they are gorgeous" A few days later she sent me thank you card. I didnt want all of that but it was lovely of her.

You sound like a lovely friend and she sounds really rude and ungrateful. I'd be edging away from her pretty quickly.

i did similar with A friend a few years back.

She’d kindly given me some sheets. I got sidetracked & said thank you etc but didn’t actually look in the bag.

maybe I was rude for not cooing over them but they were sheets. I knew they were sheets & I was distracted.
could this have happened with your friend?

id have opened them if it was something she’d made for me.

Yabu, she thanked you. As others have said it's awkward getting them out in a cafe and maybe she just wanted to get on with eating and drinking and chat?

As I said before, the least she could have done was to look inside the bag and say the clothes look lovely. Basic courtesy. And then thank her again when she’d had a chance to look at the clothes properly. This s a very rude and ungrateful way to receive a gift especially one the giver had invested so much time and effort in.

This is a good response I think.

I'd be really hurt in your position OP.

My aunt knitted some baby clothes that I really didn't like, but I was very enthusiastically grateful when she gave them to me as I knew how much time and effort it must have taken. Such a kind thought.

I completely agree. I sent so many presents to by nieces and never got a reply that in the end I texted "did the girls presents arrive" the reply was "yes" Have not sent any for the last year.