AIBU to wonder why so many people assume Johnny Depp is the good guy and Amber Heard is the villain? ..

[Cowslip4567]

People (from what I am reading in a variety of places on the internet) seem to have decided this even before the trial has been concluded. Presumably, we won't know all of the evidence until the trial ends.

The previous trial in the UK concluded that there was indeed evidence that JD was indeed a wife beater. How come everyone feels that they are sure previous trial had the wrong verdict?

He brought the suit., voluntarily.

No advisor would allow him to do so if he had anything to hide.

It's comical how his texts have upset the prim sensibilities of the Mumsnet crowd. What sheltered lives so many seem to lead that they are so easily shocked and appalled by a few unpleasant and patently absurd words.

Actually, I've lived quite an unsheltered life and also been through an abusive relationship so I'm reasonably hard to shock these days.

'Jokes' about killing women and corpse desecration do still turn my stomach though, and I'm not sure that being sufficiently jaded to be unbothered by them is something to act superior about.

As a person who had to work through a lot of anger towards my ex for what he did to me, I can honestly say that nothing like the level vitriol that JD has expressed entered my mind.

Absolute twaddle. Most domestic violence is mutual and women are responsible for roughly half of it, often instigating it.

This is an incredibly bold statement. Can you provide a source for it?
Can you also confirm if DV is experienced equally by both sexes (are 3 men killed a week at the hands of women?).

'Bold' is one word for it . . .

Ah, a bit of levity amidst the gloom. Thanks for that.

I don't agree it's equal, but surely it happens and that's all that matters.

Domestic violence is about equally perpetrated by men and women however women are disproportionately seriously injured or killed during acts of domestic violence. Domestic violence doesn't mean death so looking at stats of murdered spouses is not an indiction of the incidence of domestic violence. The majority of it is non serious injury violence (pushing, throwing things at someone, blocking / restraining them from leaving, slapping, etc )

What the fuck book of fantasy did you draw that from? Dear god there is some bs in here

kareningalasmith.com/2013/04/29/this-thing-about-male-victims/

"This is an incredibly bold statement. Can you provide a source for it?
Can you also confirm if DV is experienced equally by both sexes (are 3 men killed a week at the hands of women?)."

I have no figures for the number of men killed per week. In general men suffer far more violence and are murdered in much greater number than women.

The figures for men suffering domestic violence are around 40% of all victims

www.theguardian.com/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence

www.domestic-violence-law.com/blog/2016/april/women-or-men-who-usually-instigates-domestic-vio/

The stay I heard is 2 men a month are killed in DV circumstances

its more than 2 women a WEEK

*stat

Does it matter, men are conditioned to 'suck it up' and not complain. DV against males is believed to be vastly under reported due to this, but if its not reported i doesn't happen. From what I've witnessed the majority of DV against male is non physical.

2-3 a month? meh who cares

Latest ONS figures show under 30% of reported /call out is for males.

I agree it will be under reported

as will female dv, surely.

you can’t argue with deaths tho

and yes we SHOULD care about DV wherever it appears.

FFS

Love stats like this 30% shows that they actually know the true level otherwise it could be 90% or 5%

I suspect that the male deaths may be low due to the high suicide rate in males.

my understanding is that the rate of suicide attempts is similar among men and women. The rate of “success” is higher among men because they use more lethal methods, a pattern that I imagine is also replicated with the violence men apply to women.

misssatan

Johnny is that you ? I thought you were great in Edward Scissorhands.

Midlifemusings
Domestic violence is about equally perpetrated by men and women however women are disproportionately seriously injured or killed during acts of domestic violence. Domestic violence doesn't mean death so looking at stats of murdered spouses is not an indiction of the incidence of domestic violence. The majority of it is non serious injury violence (pushing, throwing things at someone, blocking / restraining them from leaving, slapping, etc )

"What the fuck book of fantasy did you draw that from? Dear god there is some bs in here"

I'm afraid you're the one living in a fantasy world and wallowing in bullshit. If you bothered (as the woke often say) to educate yourself about the issue and actually looked at the evidence you'd see that women are responsible for something just under half of all domestic violence and more frequently initiate it.

"my understanding is that the rate of suicide attempts is similar among men and women. The rate of “success” is higher among men because they use more lethal methods, a pattern that I imagine is also replicated with the violence men apply to women."

If you really want to kill yourself you will choose the most effective method. What you are essentially saying is women are too stupid and incompetent to kill themselves, unlike men.

The reality is more likely to be that women are frequently making a half-hearted suicide attempt in order for their distress to be seen whereas the men actually want to die.

I just also can’t get over the repetitive questioning. I don’t often watch US trials so maybe they are all like this but it’s just so funny! I have no idea how anyone is keeping a straight face.

They're not. Because I'm a geek and research is my lifeblood, I'm fascinated by the opportunity to watch US cases as we don't have this here in the UK. I suspect many people find the minutiae of a case being presented in meticulous detail, piece by painful jigsaw piece, pretty tedious to watch. I find it fascinating seeing the whole picture unfold.

I was doing a summer research project when the Casey Anthony trial was streamed online, and I had it going in the background on my PC. I watched it unfold pretty much in its entirety until the last two days of the defence case.

The lawyers in that case certainly didn't use that tedious repetitive questioning (browbeating of witness) approach. On both sides they were the epitome of detached, competent professionalism. There was a national outcry over the eventual verdict but having sat through all of it, not just the meatier titbits provided by the media, I fully understood why that jury came to the decision it did - particularly in a capital case. The defence instilled reasonable doubt. They did an exemplary job.

Amber Heard's team in this case seem curiously incompetent and hamfisted - I watched them in action for a while yesterday. The unsubtle hammering of the point gets irritating fast. As for Rottenborn's objection to his own question, well, that was like something out of the Young Ones. I was laughing like a drain.

On a childish note, I find the idea of a lawyer named 'Rottenborn' equally hilarious. Dickens would no doubt have approved. Nearly as good was the one in the Prince Andrew case - when he was trying to dodge service of the papers - called 'Bloxsome'.

Do these blokes make it up for a joke? 😂

They both come across awfully I think.

From people I’ve talked to neither is looking good on the back of this, they are as bad as each other

PS - as to the point of keeping a straight face, I was interested by the demeanours of both Heard and Depp (not that either of those mean a thing in terms of evidence, but I do like to people-watch).

His swagger, habit of bursting into laughter at inappropriate moments and the quips he no doubt thinks are clever and witty, might well be impressing his legions of doe-eyed fans, but it isn't as smart as he seems to think it is. Judges are a great deal cleverer than Depp, and as a general breed they are not impressed wit that kind of behaviour.

As for Heard, she's outwardly respectful but laying it on a bit thick with her expressions of injured innocence, not least the silly Heidi plaits which look absurd on a woman her age and are no doubt intended to complete the 'innocence' picture.

Honestly, what would you do with such a pair!

What you are essentially saying is women are too stupid and incompetent to kill themselves, unlike men.

No, you’re saying that, and you’re trying to put your words in my mouth. As I said upthread, I’ve been through an abusive relationship so all the little manipulation tricks don’t work on me now, sorry.

Perhaps women choose methods like pills rather than a gun or jumping off a building because they are more concerned about not leaving someone a gory mess to clean up. Whatever the reason is, if someone is at the point of undertaking any serious self-harm action they are clearly in severe distress, so it seems extremely heartless to describe their survival afterwards as “incompetence” or “stupidity”.