AIBU to wonder why so many people assume Johnny Depp is the good guy and Amber Heard is the villain? ..

[Cowslip4567]

People (from what I am reading in a variety of places on the internet) seem to have decided this even before the trial has been concluded. Presumably, we won't know all of the evidence until the trial ends.

The previous trial in the UK concluded that there was indeed evidence that JD was indeed a wife beater. How come everyone feels that they are sure previous trial had the wrong verdict?

People on both sides are making dangerous comments and assumptions on this thread. I think Depp refusing to deny on recordings he has hit AH or head butted is compelling but these sound clips seem to generally be pretty short/cut at odd times and JD is off his head.

whoever said upthread that the make up artist seeing AH with bruises means something is wrong, sorry. She didn’t see JD hit her, she just saw bruises. Those could come from anywhere. Critical thinking is required. It’s not acceptable to present AH as onlY victim, nor Johnny Depp, and I don’t know why people here are so keen to do so.

they are both abusers. It’s stupid how his fans are blindly ignoring what he’s done, but this thread seems to jsut be repeating that AH is a victim (she is) without seeing that she is also an abuser.

The case is not about whether AH is an abuser, that is just a distraction technique employed by Depp’s team .

The case is about whether or not AH’s piece for the Washington Post defamed Depp. And given the mountain of evidence that he is indeed violent, it cannot be found that the article was defamatory because truth is a defence.

Depp is a proven liar and abuser, this has been demonstrated time and again.

The case is about whether or not AH’s piece for the Washington Post defamed Depp.

Exactly. And has anyone actually read the article? It's not really about Depp. It's about the reaction she faced when she accused him of abuse - even if you think she's lying, does that mean that she deserved death threats from the public? (And I completely believe her when she talks about this - women receive death threats / rape threats for far less these days). And actually, the majority of the article isn't even about her - she talks about the impact of the #metoo movement, and how things are changing in Congress and on college campuses. It's also quite carefully written - she never says she was a victim of domestic abuse, just that she became a public figure representing domestic abuse. To be honest, I find it interesting that with all of the negative press that JD has received over the years, he deems this article worthy of suing for defamation.

What questions?

You had a go at his looks and yet are disgusted when I point out she isn't looking all that great any more? You don't see the double standards?

Lots of people bump heads accidentally. If you're restraining a crazy, violent woman it's very likely to happen.

The 'threats' are alleged by her and she is a liar. Banging doors doesn't count as abuse.

I think it was because as part of the divorce proceedings they signed NDAs to never talk about the relationship and he felt this was her way to get at him and say things without identifying him to get around the NDA. Given it led to the end of his career and many negative consequences for him - it is clear that most believed it to be about him.

"But Johnny Depp absolutely does meet your criteria as an abuser and all way before Amber Heard ever met him."

And yet his old flames support him in this case. The rest is just wild allegations.

She, on the other hand, does have much better documented form as a violent woman, attacking an ex girlfriend, her sister and more recently her ex friend Rocky.

PlasticineMeg

ambear Heard’s arrest for assault of her girlfriend was steeped heavily in homophobia. As the police have admitted. Her girlfriend says it was an argument and has spoken very loudly about how it was an uncalled for arrest from a bucktooth airport copper who can’t cope that some women are lesbians

The arresting officer is a lesbian.

"And there we have it ladies and gentlemen, the patriarchy in action. Because it’s FAR more offensive to be a ‘woman of questionable behaviour’ then to be a man who is a violent druggie and abuser."

And there we have it ladies and gentlemen, misandry in action. Because it’s FAR more offensive to be a man who drinks and takes drugs than to be a woman who is violent and who has admitted on tape to being violent and has a history of violence against her girlfriend, sister and (ex) friend.

Only a feminist would say something so ridiculous about the cross examination of Heard.

"Heard’s arrest for assault of her girlfriend was steeped heavily in homophobia."

Except the arresting officer was a gay woman.

The psychologist in the case was their couples therapist and most certainly met her. You obviously aren't following the case carefully.

"The LAPD are notorious for Hollywood corruption!"

Right, so everyone is out to get poor Amber.

So far on the pro-Amber side we have had:

The female officer of the LAPD is against her.
The female officer who arrested her for hitting her girlfriend is against her and was obviously homophobic despite being gay herself.
The makeup company lied about their own brand to 'get' Amber .

Have you considered that it isn't all these people who are lying, but Heard?

'You obviously aren't following the case carefully' - jeez who would?

Amber has borderline personality disorder - not suprising given the trauma she grew up with. You really hear it in how she pleads in the recordings with Johnny to not leave when he wants space to walk away and deescalate the arguments and she won't let him go and starts to escalate even more when he tries to leave. The recordings in court yesterday were textbook for BPD. She agrees with him that the arguments shouldn't continue but then gets panicked and angry and does whatever she can verbally and physically to make him stay. . She can't handle the 'abandonment' of him even going to another room or apartment when she is upset.

Their conversations are also full of metaphors and they sometimes talk like they are reading scripts - so I do think the use of words like bloodbath and monster are not necessarily accurate representations given the language they use when conversing / arguing

Why do people keep bringing up the fact that the arresting officer was a lesbian? It’s not really relevant when Ambers ex never claimed the arresting officer was homophobic. She accused a male security guard of being homophobic for calling the police on them but not once did she claim the arresting officer was homophobic.

The case is about whether or not AH’s piece for the Washington Post defamed Depp.

Lots of people seem to be forgetting this. Amber Heard is not on trial here for her behaviour, only what she wrote in the article.

I personally don't see how JD can win this, especially after losing his case in the UK, but there's a jury and if they like him they might side with him.
On the other hand, Americans pride themselves on their freedom of speech. I imagine at some point Amber's defence will be arguing this.

I think they're both damaged abusive and abused people, however I don't think JD should win. He could have salvaged his career if he'd stayed quiet or just issued a simple statement denying any wrong doing on got on with his acting jobs.

Thank goodness they didn't have children together.

I think he knows he won't win it. I think this was his only way (from his perspective) to get out what really happened (recordings), to have a voice, and to tell his side of the story in the hopes of salvaging his reputation and the respect of those he cares about. I think he wanted another version of events to be publicly recorded other than it just being Johnny Depp beat his wife and Amber Heard is a victim. She tells him in the recordings that no one will believe him that he was a victim too as he is a man and that no one cares about male victims of abuse. She knew she had the upper hand in the public eye and he wanted to change that. Everyone knows that at least some point, the violence was both ways - so I am sure he knows he can't win legally. I think the win for him is just telling his story.

I think the win for him is just telling his story.

I agree, although his story hasn't exactly covered him in glory, his behaviour has been awful as well.
I get impression he also wants to make sure she has her reputation destroyed and never works again. He's paying a lot of money for revenge against her.

He could have salvaged his career if he'd stayed quiet

😮😮
Does your advice apply to women as well or is it just men that should stay quiet?

It is rarely helpful when people put others into "good" or "bad" categories. Everyone (all of us) are shit people sometimes and we need to remember that all humans are fallible to a larger or lesser degree.

That said, I echo what some others have said. She has repeatedly been seen to lie, make things up and has a history of abusive behaviour. At the same time, Depp sounds troubled himself and certainly isn't an innocent party.

I am always interested in this belief that its "always women's fault" when I see little evidence of that being the actual case. In fact, I find women get a free pass in many of these instances, with assumptions that they were provoked or being abusive. We also need to remember that in the UK we have something called coercive control and I suspect Heard fits into that category nicely.

I don't think it is just revenge. He already didn't look good before the court case so he had a lot less to lose. His issues with drugs and drink are life long (he has said he started using at 11 and was heavy into drugs by 14) and there have been stories of assualts and bad behaviour throughout his career. Then she published the article that led to the wife beater claims and the loss of his job and so he is exposing dirt in an already dirty pit. I don't know if he wants to ruin her or just be sure others know she wasn't an innocent party and this wasn't the way it was portrayed. Recordings and stories and mentions of her actions have been out there for years now and none of it seems to have hampered her career. I think he just wanted it on record.

Does your advice apply to women as well or is it just men that should stay quiet?

No of course not, everybody has the right to speak up. I was wondering if it is worth it for him to put himself through all this to get his story out. Obviously he thinks so.

I've seen people bitter from relationships gone wrong. Is it better to draw a line under it and get on with your life or to keep trying to get some justice from it ? - genuine question - I don't know.

They’re both equally toxic and abused one another in equal measures. I don’t think either of them have come across well at all. It’s a shame for Johnny because prior to this I’d say he was a fairly private person, not much in the gutter press about him anyway. Now we know all of his dirty laundry which is a bit embarrassing for him.

If people are siding with Depp more I’d just say it’s because he’s way more famous and people have held him high regard for so many years. It can be difficult to accept someone you have admired and liked for years is actually an abusive drunk.

Because there is so much evidence of her being an abuser and a liar.

Because the evidence against him seems to pale in comparison. For example three pieces of evidence against him are, private texts to a mate saying unpleasant things (and I don't for one minute believe anyone who says they have never said nasty and vile things about someone to someone else.) A photo of him asleep with melted ice-cream on him and now the comments about how he fell asleep drunk on a beach in 2013.

Amber has a track record for abuse in previous partners. Johnny doesn't. Amber lied about the make up she used on bruises that make up didn't even exist that year and the brand have disputed her claims. There is many hours of audio recordings of her abusing him and mocking him and goading him whilst he tries to escape her. She harassed and goaded him the day his mother died. She threw a bottle that severed his finger. People connected to her have a lot of unpleasant things to say about her including her former assistant whereas with Johnny it's the opposite.

Despite domestic abuse being common against women, it does happen to men and yes amazingly sometimes abuse victims can be abusive themselves it doesn't equal them to the abuser and that goes for male abuse victims too.

Where are you pulling this from? Winona actually testified on JD'S behalf that he wasn't abusive towards her. I even googled "Kate Moss abuse" and all it led back to was the trashing of a hotel room where she was unhurt...

I'm just really not sure why so many posters think this is some kind of a truth and justice commission to establish who was the more abusive, and what percentage of the abuse in the relationship can be ascribed to either.

It isn't.