To ask how I don’t be bitter this weekend?

[Dancingmoonlight]

I’ve recently become friends with a girl I used to work with, we only worked together for six months and were friendly then, but have been spending some time together recently. Going for the odd cocktail etc. she’s always been nice enough.

She asked if I’d be interested in going to Berlin with her for the weekend, and I said yes. So here we are now and my issue is, my friend turned up with no money hardly. She turned up at the airport with 60 euros and only 7 pound for a four day trip. We have no food included in our room.

I wouldn’t have minded but she’s recently been on a 3 day night out, meals out, cinema and whatever else. Now we are in Berlin and she can’t afford anything and I’m having to subsidise us. Even at the airport with a 4 hour wait, she couldn’t even afford a coffee so I have had to cover it.

Now we are in Berlin, and she’s also so angry. If I go into a shop to look at anything or, if we go to a bar, it’s obvious she’s uncomfortable as she can’t afford anything and then it puts me on the spot. She’s also being very sweary and angry! This trip was her idea and she’s been abroad to European cities before so she knows they’re pricey.

Weve got two more nights and I honestly don’t know how to stop feeling so awkward. I brought enough money (280 euros) but it’s now draining so fast.

You’re not a mug, you’re a martyr. People have tried to help you, advised you what to say, and still you want to give her money? You need to grow a backbone and stop playing victim.

@dora38 that's silly. For some people it's budget travel or none at all, or some of us would rather do more on a shoestring than less too. In a place with free museums and parks most of what I want to do is free. If you travel a lot you learn to do it cheaply at times. I don't think that makes OP miserable at all or that she'd be better off at home - apart from CF "friend." You may consider her budget too small for you to have on but there's a difference between low budget and impossible; lumping them both in together and calling OP miserable is ignorant in my opinion.

*have fun on

I'm sad for you that the trip was soured because the 'friend' had not brought enough money. I can envisage the scenario when ordering food or shopping and I, like others, think you should ditch her and block social media WHEN she has paid you back.
On a side note, my mantra is to never borrow (fortunately never needed to do that) and never lend, be that to family or friends
with the exception of a guy I dated when I was 18, with whom I spent the day at Southport Lido who had 'forgotten his wallet' which he left in his car but was unwilling to fetch it.
One of my AC in a well paid government job has borrowed three times then gone NC, changed number etc.
Fourth time I refused. She has no dependents bar a dog and in her mid 30s. I suggested bank o/d or workplace loan (they deduct from salary - no interest)
She gave me two options, lend the money or not have her in my life . I said I'd like both her and the money. That was January 2016.
Nothing since then.
I hope the OP makes sure that any friend on future trips, is aware that they have to have enough money to last the whole holiday so both can enjoy the trip.

She is angry because you haven't offered her a loan. Be very careful she planned this in advance and will never repay you

I'll eat my hat if she pays you back.

That’s so disappointing for you. We all know that sometimes happens that use up the last of our money. If she had said to you before the holiday that she had little left and was there any chance of borrowing any that would be different. At least you would be aware of a the loan rather than spending the few days guilt tripped into buying her things.
Some people you just won’t ever understand. I hope you manage to enjoy some of your holiday.

So she's being angry with you is she Because she's got no money!! What an absolute pathetic person she is. Your well out of it.what a disappointment for you sorry

She told you not to make a scene and you are still planning on giving her money tomorrow. You are honestly not helping yourself!

I was thinking this.

I’ve heard of people like this! Honestly don’t get how they have friends/or people stay friends with them!! Just weird

You're going to give her more money?

She's taken the absolute piss out of you, had a bad attitude about it as well and your plan is to give her yet more money that you'll likely never see again.

🤦 See you on the thread next week where you ask how to get her to pay up or complain that she's fallen out with you.

I agree with Redmake88.

Wow just wow! She sounds like an absolute nightmare! I would definitely part ways after this trip, once you’ve got your money back.

You worked together for a mere 6 months and have occasionally gone out socially since. This person is not a friend, she is a CF who is trying to take advantage of you. I'd make sure she can get to airport for the flight home and that's it. And that's being generous. Who turns up for a eirooean city break with 70 euros??? She doesn't have a credit card?

cant believe how reading about this person I will hopefully never meet has irritated me so much, I hate people like this.

As above, say you didn't realise that you'd be expected to subsidise her, and can't. Ask if there's any free places she'd like to visit together, visit those, then tell her there's some things you'd like to do. Go off on your own and have a good time. Be pleasant when you meet up later, get home, break contact with the sulky CF.

What a horrible way to spend what was supposed to be a nice break.

I’ve skimmed this thread. Tbh, the op is happy to be a doormat. I really have no sympathy for her.

When I saw your opening post I thought you must both be young - it sounds like the disorganised thing a young person might do! But you say you're in your thirties? That's just bizarre. I would be really pissed off if I'd gone on holiday with someone at that age and they tried to sponge off me.

You are a mug OP. It's true that a fool and his money are soon parted.

It's sad she has spoilt your holiday with her conniving behaviour. I hope you get your money back but I think the chances are slim. You are not a mug, if she had told you before hand and you had agreed to sub her then yes that would be different but she scammed you and put you in an impossible situation. Put it down to experience and move on.

How are things going OP? Any updates x

I’m sure I have read this story before - CF friend taking advantage on a holiday.

You're literally her meal ticket, and it's my opinion that she planned it this way. Anyone who had genuinely fucked up their cash flow would be so apologetic, would not be all stroppy and certainly wouldn't be ordering a steak sandwich instead of a cheaper option.

I have to say, I find it odd that this friendship has suddenly developed recently, considering you'd only worked with her for 6 months. It's not a long time at all, you barely know her. It's almost like she's sniffed you out as someone she can take advantage of. Speaks volumes that she's not gone away with a longstanding friend or relative and instead picked someone who is more of an acquaintance depth of friendship. Perhaps she's pissed off all the people who could have become her proper friends, and she just flits from one person to the next, using them?