Asking someone to move seats on a flight? Aibu ?

[wearejustfriends]

Last week I was travelling to Gran Canaria with TUI.
I had booked mine and boyfriends seats when we booked and paid £22 for both.
I had the window and he had the middle.

A lady sat on the end and her daughter was in front.
She asked could they have our two seats and we have hers /daughters or my boyfriend switch with her daughter.
I politely said no.
Which she wasn't happy about.
We got "what difference does it make"
"Your adults,my daughter is sacred of flying and is a minor"

Anyway we wouldn't move.

Was I in the wrong ?
Surely if she was that bothered she could have paid like us.

I recently flew BA, I'd booked business class and confirmed our four seats at check in. The middle seat isn't used in BA short haul business class, just the window and aisle.

Got to the airport to find out they'd moved us all (we had our boarding passes with our original seats confirmed) to middle seats spread round the cabin. Pretty annoying given two of the four were children.

While the couple next to me let me swap to an aisle as I was sat in between them, the rest of my family ended up sitting in between all the other couples on the plane. Too far away for us to speak to the kids and check they were ok.

I was sufficiently annoyed to ask BA to change our seats so the kids had one of us next to them at least (plus I'd booked an aisle as I'd had surgery so wanted to stretch my operated leg) but they fobbed us off saying it had to be the gate staff. They then fobbed us off to the cabin crew. The cabin crew (who in fairness were the only polite staff) said they're not allowed to ask passengers to move seats and it was the gate staff's job.

It was doubly annoying that no one was vaguely apologetic about moving us so the kids had to sit on their own. Surely it would be fairer to split up the adults in the first instance. Although I don't blame you for staying put if they were sitting in front of each other so could talk to each other.

I just want to know how the child actually fared on the flight in the end!!

[quote wearejustfriends]@Genevie82 I'm not petty.
I'm a nervous flyer hence paying for seats together
It's not my problem the woman didn't book any seats so she wouldn't have this issue.
I actually don't feel guilty in the slightest and why should I
[/quote]
Just out of curiosity

If you don’t feel guilty. Why did you ask if you should of swapped the seats?!?

I wouldn’t give two hoots what you did, moved or not moved

Just strange that if you don’t feel guilty. Then surely it wouldn’t even enter your head now?

@grapewines

You value money and the entitlements it gives you more than a stranger's child's feelings. The privilege is all yours. Own it.

Yes, I do. If I paid for a seat it is because I want to sit there for my comfort. The child's comfort is her parent's responsibility not mine.

You are responsible for your own child. Own it.

* I was sufficiently annoyed to ask BA to change our seats so the kids had one of us next to them at least *

You’d booked 4 business class tickets together
You had children

And you say “you were sufficiently annoyed to ask BA to sit one child per adult”

Seriously? Why don’t just bend over at the same time!

You aren’t wrong because it’s the airline policy to pay for seats, however I think the airlines are being very unreasonable to make you pay extra to sit beside your children.
It’s actually easier logistically for airlines to use a booking system that just books the next seats along but definitely Ryanair etc have you sat at either end of the plane until you pay.

I’m surprised they never got called out on it during the pandemic. Paying extra to sit with your household seemed insane at the time but they got away with it.

One day there will be an incident on a budget airline and it will be twice as bad as people will be trying to find their loved ones rather than evacuating properly.

No way would I have moved I don't give a shit about some random child's feelings either. I've paid it's my seat.

@Nocutenamesleft
To be fair… BH Monday, chilling, no plans, fancy a discussion? It’s sort of the crux of chat forums really isn’t it?

Why couldn't the mother ask the person sitting next to her daughter - I wonder? 2 hefty blokes maybe???
& Op you paid & booked - she didn't & the signs are all there on the forms - her own fault
By the by decades ago were dd1 was tiny we did a long distance journey & booked a carry cot they sat the2 +1 of us in the front seat be the emergency exit. Fromwhat others have said they wouldn't know - mind we adults were hale healthy & able bodied & I think I could grab baby throw carry cot behind whilst dh & & other male passenger could help with door & exit
The Asian airline was hilarious in one way - we were traveling at night & as I was feeding db I was thirsty & the lights were dimmed so the air stewards were sitting down near the little kitchen just in front. I asked for an orange juice & they said "help your self!" in a friendly way it was PIA (they were lovely with helping me with db).

@toastofthetown - it's funny, that definition you give isn't too far off a definition of criminal fraud:

Present one price but charge an inflated version after the point of initial sale, when the price is agreed...

But no, it's just good business practice...

"It allows them advertise the price at a lower headline rate, rather than getting more money out of customers overall. As someone who happy sitting wherever on the plane and alone this suits me. If airlines stopped charging the fee to select seats, the base ticket price would increase."

So, if you've thought ahead and got yourself a sandwich and a drink for later, when you'll be hungry... and I haven't bothered to do that, and now there are no sandwiches and drinks left for the next 3 hours... can I just have yours? Because you'd be mean not to let me?

Or, am I a pillock for not thinking ahead and buying my own sandwich and drink beforehand, knowing that they'd be in limited supply later?

IF this child was genuinely in need of sitting next to her mother, her Mother had chance to plan for that and pay to be seated next to each other.

She made the decision to chance it - how is she NOT mean for doing that to her kid, assuming the kid is genuinely worried, and yet the OP IS mean for not swapping?

Why must the OP have more care and consideration for someone elses child, than that childs actual parent?!

The person I feel most sorry for is the one sitting next to an unrelated child on a flight! I think if you’ve paid extra for a seat you should sit in it, if you weren’t bothered presumably you’d have saved your money. If you absolutely need to sit next to someone and there’s no available pre-bookable seats you’d need to book a different flight. Personally I think airlines should automatically allocate one parent to sit with children but that’s not the way it is

No, I wouldn’t move. Pay for your seat, like I do, if you want to sit together.

@Clymene

Next time I go to the theatre, I'm going to ask someone in row A to swap their seats with shitty ones behind the pillar in row P and tell them Mumsnet said it's the kind thing to do

😂 Good luck with that!

This happens to me fairly regularly. I like aisle seats and will swap for another aisle if asked nicely, but not for any other type of seat. That said, I'm usually traveling alone and the airlines I fly don't charge for seat assignments.

YANBU.

@Genevie82

..I’m going against the grain here but think the decent thing to do would have been to swap the seat with her child.. you sound petty tbh.. I expect what happened here is that she had been unable to book seats next to each other as they were all booked out already - it’s happened very recently on a flight I did so you have to sit like this with your child and rely on the kindness of strangers - or not in your case! I could not have sat through that flight knowing the child infront of me might be feeling nervous not being with their mum, regardless of what I though of them and then post on MN to try and make myself feel justified!

You chose to book a flight knowing there were no seats left together then?

If you knowingly book a flight where there are no seats together left, then you are being cheeky asking the people who booked earlier and got seats together to move.

If you try to book the cinema and there are no seats together left, you either accept not sitting together or book a different showing. It’s the same with flights except with the addition factor that many of the other people on the flight have paid extra to reserve seats.

It’s not a ‘kindness of strangers’ situation when you knew at the time of booking that you wouldn’t be sitting together. You can’t complain that it’s too hard to cope with sitting behind your child if you knew that was the situation when you booked.

Of course you weren’t wrong. Woman was a cheeky fucker to ask to swap a window seat.

Did she also ask the person in the middle seat next to her dd?

Why must the OP have more care and consideration for someone elses child, than that childs actual parent?!

This is a question that comes up on stepparenting threads all the time. Because the child’s parents can’t be expected to be responsible for their child. Nope.

[quote CorsicaDreaming]@toastofthetown - it's funny, that definition you give isn't too far off a definition of criminal fraud:

Present one price but charge an inflated version after the point of initial sale, when the price is agreed...

But no, it's just good business practice...

"It allows them advertise the price at a lower headline rate, rather than getting more money out of customers overall. As someone who happy sitting wherever on the plane and alone this suits me. If airlines stopped charging the fee to select seats, the base ticket price would increase."[/quote]
It's not at all like criminal fraud 😂 They will fly you to the destination at the price advertised. They also sell extra services at prices which are clearly signposted and clear during the booking process. You are under no obligation to book any of them. Is a first class train ticket criminal fraud too, because I see a sign saying I can get a train to London for £10?

@FairyCakeWings

Of course you weren’t wrong. Woman was a cheeky fucker to ask to swap a window seat.

Did she also ask the person in the middle seat next to her dd?

I’d imagine she was hoping to bag a window seat for the supposedly terrified child.

@Tigofigo

We once booked a flight thinking they automatically seated DC with parents. Our children were 2 and 5 and they sat them on different rows to us! No one offered to move. It wasn't ideal but it was a short flight.

But couldn't one of you each sit with a child, in the different rows?

@notimagain - well they should just charge the correct price and be done with it, not wait until after checkout and then stick you with another great cost...

I find it really annoying especially if you are buying a package holiday, as you may well choose holiday X over Y as it appears to be £x cheaper, only to find it's going to cost more just before you finalise it on "hidden extras" (like a seat next to the people you have chosen to holiday with, rather than being randomly scattered across a plane with a 3 year old as happened to us several years back, when we had t realised that would happen - we thought we would be together, just not get to choose exactly where....
It felt like they'd done it on purpose to make you pay up.

@LemonViolet

YANBU. You paid to select seats, she didn’t, her loss.

Maybe you could have offered to sell them to her for £44

This! 😆👍🏼

@FairyCakeWings

Of course you weren’t wrong. Woman was a cheeky fucker to ask to swap a window seat.

Did she also ask the person in the middle seat next to her dd?

Bingo.

Mom didn't want to place herself in a middle seat, did she now?

I don't feel guilty but I was curious on other peoples opinions and what others would of done