I’m fully expecting to get flamed here.
I have a dog myself and two cats, and partner has three dogs he shared with his ex partner of over 15 years. They spend half their time with us and half at his exs, generally two weeks on and off.
I really do consider myself a dog and animal lover in general but I find myself getting so stressed out when they’re all here.
I work from home (SE) and partner works out the house and is out for 10-12 hours a day meaning most of the looking after falls on my shoulders.
They are a very notoriously stubborn breed of dog meaning they generally don’t listen to anything I say. They are “alert dogs” so they bark constantly; my dog is anxious so I’m used to barking but when he stops I immediately go to him and get him to calm down, it’s a lot harder with 4.
If I try and walk them they all pull a ridiculous amount, I can’t walk all 4 at the same time so I have to do 2 at a time which takes at least 90 minutes out of my day in which I already have a small amount of time to work with doing the school runs.
Just little things like not getting to sit on my sofa in the evenings because it’s only a 3 seater and DP and them all sit together. They have always slept upstairs in the bedroom and being puppies, so they obviously do that here, spending all night grunting and snoring, running around the bed trying to jump on from 3am whilst my dog is tucked up quietly downstairs.
I’ve tried doing little bits of training with them throughout the day, but whereas my dog will sit, paw, and wait, they all barge around and won’t listen to any commands for a treat.
One is very pukey meaning I’m usually cleaning up every day. I’ve changed her food to something hypoallergic but the ex feeds her whatever so she usually still has stomach issues when she’s here.
I have sensory issues regarding sound so I quite often find myself getting seriously overwhelmed by all the noise and sounds they make.
Life is just so much easier when they’re not here. They’re very affectionate dogs which makes me wish I could calm down about some of the earlier issues and find better ways to cope with the noise and other things but I really do struggle with it.
Partner knows I find them being here very stressful, I would never stop them coming and stop him seeing them but I’d really like some ways to cope better with them. I suppose if it all wasn’t left on my shoulders I’d feel better but it’s impossible to do with DP being out the house for so long with work.
Does anyone have any advice for me?