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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours treat their garden like a living room

429 replies

Norgernert · 17/04/2022 17:57

I realise this could be entitlement / snobbery / nimbyism, hence looking for a genuine perspective on whether IABU.

We live in a quiet, semi-rural steading conversion, so a smallish cluster of houses in converted farm buildings. We’ve lived here for 20+ years, and it has always been blissfully quiet.

2 years ago the last working farm building was sold off to someone who converted it, and now they live there - young family in their late 20s with toddlers (we are in our 40s with teenagers).

The problem is, they are so very loud Sad

Their conversion forms a courtyard, and they just treat the courtyard as another room of the house. They usually have double doors open, TV or music on, shouting from one side to the other.

It carries right through the area. There is no getting away from it, even going for a walk in the previously quiet fields.

We have had some respite in the winter when it was cold, but they are back to normal today and I just know it will be like this until autumn.

Do we just need to suck it up and accept that we have been lucky until now?

OP posts:
surreygirl1987 · 17/04/2022 23:15

@lethimhaveit

*'However, they technically have every right to use their property in this way, and there isn't anything you can do about it.'

Nope. Still no. How can so many people have no knowledge of nuisance law?*

Can you elaborate please? When I had an extremely noisy neighbour, the police told me I couldn't do anything about it. When I looked into this, I learned that there isn't a clear definition of what 'unreasonable' means and that I'd have to prove damages (and I didn't really have any - it was just annoying and I thought the neighbours were being selfish!). My understanding at the time, based on discussions with police, council and research was that it is extremely difficult to do anything about neighbours like this. So if you know more... please do share!

CrotchetyQuaver · 17/04/2022 23:15

@tedgran

Play very loud opera?
I did exactly this last night, noisy neighbours over the road constantly having parties even through lockdown had yet another party. Lots of effing and jeffing and loud music. Really pissed me off. I went and put radio 3 on full bore in my car with the windows open. Who knew an old Yaris had such an impressive sound system Grin Radio 3 obliged with a soprano singing something pretty shrieky from a modern opera. Took about 3 minutes for them over the road to get the hint and turn their music down to a reasonable level where it couldn't be heard by everyone in a 1/2 mile radius.

I would suggest you go and have a word with your neighbours and ask them to keep it down if you all live round a courtyard. They should have moved somewhere with a big garden and very few neighbours. What do your other neighbours think or is it just the two houses?

surreygirl1987 · 17/04/2022 23:17

So if I wanted to be really nasty I could report them for that.

I really would. You have a really useful advantage... if you want things to change, use it!

TheUsualChaos · 17/04/2022 23:18

YANBU. I would hate it OP and would probably be considering moving if it doesn't get better as if they plan to stay long term you'll have 10+ more years of this.

oakleaffy · 17/04/2022 23:19

So if I wanted to be really nasty I could report them for that

@Norgernert

The fact that they are bawling across the courtyard is the reason they are so bloody noisy.

Bifold doors are hell. Thy make the entire household noise be heard by neighbours.

I'd not be surprised if someone Does report them to planning.
[Wink]

ButtockUp · 17/04/2022 23:23

I hear you OP.
Have enjoyed blissful quietness for nearly 25 years but about two years ago, neighbours have decided to build an external bar and install a hot tub.
With our doors and widows shut we can still her the loud shrieking and squealing from them.
Yes, we're all entitled to use our property as we see fit but not when it inconveniences other neighbours every single bloody day and night.

Yes, we're planning to move. Grrr...

oakleaffy · 17/04/2022 23:29

Re someone getting revenge on noise..{It worked..}

A teenager was revising for GCSE's
Someone had bought the large family abutting their garden a whistle.
One of the loud type that was available at festivals many years back.

The Whistling went on all bloody DAY.

The revising teen positioned their speakers on their windowsill and played this track on their sound system.

Very offensive, but the parents got the message.

The whistle on the track sounded just like the whistle the kids had.
This is a tamer version.....

soootiredddd · 17/04/2022 23:45

YANBU, I said to DH on Friday “when the weather is nice doesn’t it make you think it would be amazing to live somewhere very rural in a detached house with no neighbours anywhere near? Then you’d never have to hear everyone in their gardens?”

Then I realised our (very nice and quiet) next door neighbour was stood just behind the fence and heard every word 😬

Felix0204 · 17/04/2022 23:47

I feel your pain I used to live next door to a pensioner who I'd only see when she was hanging her washing up. She unfortunately passed away and my new neighbours have built a party shed right next to our hedge. Summers a nightmare one bit of sun and they have all their friends round
and thumping music. You just have to learn to live with it we are looking to move to a larger property but you can never tell who or what the neighbours will be like.

RachelGreeneGreep · 17/04/2022 23:49

Yea, but wasn’t supposed to be. They applied for planning permission like that. Had planning refused. Resubmitted with the smaller building as a garage and workshop, which was approved subject to them maintaining the courtyard as parking. But then they went ahead and did their original 2 building design (i.e. converted their new garage into a family room with bifolds rather than garage door) once the building was signed off. So if I wanted to be really nasty I could report them for that.

I absolutely would report them.

QuestionableMouse · 17/04/2022 23:51

You're not a nightmare. It's awful having a quiet place ruined with noise. I'd hate it too.

Runnerduck34 · 17/04/2022 23:51

Nothing you can do about it but it is inconsiderate if they are making a lot of noise.
I sympathise, we also live rurally. A couple of years ago next door was sold to a large family and they extended to max right up to our boundary, they have an "echo chamber" extension with bi fold doors which are always open in summer so now I can hear every conversation and hear exactly what they are watching on TV. They also have loud conversations in the garden, one of them seems to come outside of the house to talk "privately " ( but loudly!) on his mobile not realising we can hear every word ! They also have a dog they leave outside and who barks non stop whenever we are in our garden. They just seem to do everything at maximum volume.
So I realise all this sounds petty but when you are used to hearing nothing birdsong in your garden it's a bit jarring. Tbh my mum lives in a town and her neighbours are a lot quieter and she can sit in her garden in peace which sadly we can now only do when they are out! So I do understand where you are coming from OP.

Isonthecase · 17/04/2022 23:58

I would absolutely report them, there's a fairly good chance planning was refused because behaviour like this would be expected. They sound like absolute twats.

Jewel52 · 17/04/2022 23:58

I think you’re being unreasonable by turning this into some kind of class war. Make it about noise not suggesting your neighbours are socially inferior.

Original poster
Norgernert · 18/04/2022 00:06

@Jewel52

I think you’re being unreasonable by turning this into some kind of class war. Make it about noise not suggesting your neighbours are socially inferior.
Huh?

When did I do that?!?

OP posts:
CuddlyCactus · 18/04/2022 00:06

Could you get together with any other neighbours that are disturbed and go round to see the nuisance neighbour together?
Explain the design of the 2 buildings is causing the issue as sound is amplified. Tell them exactly what programmes have been on and details of all the conversations you've overheard as they shout back and forward. Tell them as this illegal layout is causing a noise nuisance you will have to report it to the council.

House up the road from me had a teenager who used to come home from school and play the drums for about an hour every day before parents were home. Their next door neighbour went round couple of times but he didn't answer the door (probably cos he didn't hear themHmm) I could hear it in my garden but not in house.
So one day several of the neighbours went round together when parents were home with s as letter signed by the couple of houses either side and houses across the road, all detailing how it disturbed them and asking him not to play the drums every afternoon.
None of us ever heard any drums again!
Sometimes it takes a realisation they are upsetting all the neighbours to get people to take it seriously

Original poster
Norgernert · 18/04/2022 00:09

@CuddlyCactus that sounds like a really good idea. I know all of us have complained multiple times individually (and BBQ neighbours anonymous anusol delivery today Grin) but maybe a concerted united front would be a good way to go.

OP posts:
ItsYabbaDabbaDoTime · 18/04/2022 00:13

Lighthearted.

Buy some giant outdoor speakers and play Cardi B’s WAP on repeat all day looong (interspersed with some darker Eminem tracks).

Seriously …

get in touch with the council (environmental health & planning enforcement).

milkyaqua · 18/04/2022 00:15

So if I wanted to be really nasty I could report them for that.

I think it is your civic duty to report them.

Shauny098 · 18/04/2022 00:18

YANBU but those wanting to send an “anonymous letter”, it’s just snake behaviour. Those the kind of ppl who leave a note on your car saying “stop parking like a cnt you selfish twt” 🙄🥱….I would politely just mention that the noise really carries and it’s starting to be a pain, maybe they aren’t aware. It would P me right off though but I have no tolerance for other ppls noise. We are extremely quiet neighbours and are lucky enough to have land which suits me fine, I don’t know how I’d cope if I had to listen to anyone else near our property!

MidnightMeltdown · 18/04/2022 00:21

YANBU. I can't stand thick, ignorant people who play load music in the garden. Nobody who has been brought up to respect other people behaves like this. It's incredibly selfish.

If you complain to your local authority they are obliged to deal with any noise that is deemed a nuisance. People are not allowed to behave however they like simply because they own a property. Not if they are causing nuisance to others.

MidnightMeltdown · 18/04/2022 00:25

Loud music that should read, not loads!

SweetSakura · 18/04/2022 00:29

I sympathise. our neighbours use their garden to an obnoxious extent. I do think there is a point when the level of use /noise volume becomes un-neighbourly and in small plots that is long before the regular loud parties end of the scale. I could never sit in our garden and the Weeknd and expect to hear myself think, and it's really tedious and I think quite selfish.

milkyaqua · 18/04/2022 00:29

@Shauny098

YANBU but those wanting to send an “anonymous letter”, it’s just snake behaviour. Those the kind of ppl who leave a note on your car saying “stop parking like a cnt you selfish twt” 🙄🥱….I would politely just mention that the noise really carries and it’s starting to be a pain, maybe they aren’t aware. It would P me right off though but I have no tolerance for other ppls noise. We are extremely quiet neighbours and are lucky enough to have land which suits me fine, I don’t know how I’d cope if I had to listen to anyone else near our property!
I'm afraid that ship has sailed. OP said:

Several of us have spoken to them. He said sorry but doesn’t do anything. She just laughs.

SweetSakura · 18/04/2022 00:32

Also definitely please report them to planning enforcement. The planning system exists for a reason.

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