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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbours treat their garden like a living room

429 replies

Norgernert · 17/04/2022 17:57

I realise this could be entitlement / snobbery / nimbyism, hence looking for a genuine perspective on whether IABU.

We live in a quiet, semi-rural steading conversion, so a smallish cluster of houses in converted farm buildings. We’ve lived here for 20+ years, and it has always been blissfully quiet.

2 years ago the last working farm building was sold off to someone who converted it, and now they live there - young family in their late 20s with toddlers (we are in our 40s with teenagers).

The problem is, they are so very loud Sad

Their conversion forms a courtyard, and they just treat the courtyard as another room of the house. They usually have double doors open, TV or music on, shouting from one side to the other.

It carries right through the area. There is no getting away from it, even going for a walk in the previously quiet fields.

We have had some respite in the winter when it was cold, but they are back to normal today and I just know it will be like this until autumn.

Do we just need to suck it up and accept that we have been lucky until now?

OP posts:
Silversprinkles · 18/04/2022 00:32

Wait until they've had a group of friends round to show off their new home. Then report them for the planning deceit in the following week. They hopefully will be wondering who in their friendship group has dobbed them in, rather than you.

anotheronenow · 18/04/2022 00:56

I really feel for you and I find myself really puzzled by the people voting that you are BU. I can only surmise most of them didn't read your follow-up posts and realize this is not normal neighbourly noise!

I am +1 for banding together with other neighbours and sending a letter to planning and the council about the noise. It is not acceptable behavior by them for him to say sorry and carry on with the noise and for her to laugh when people point it out to her. They did not get planning permission for the noise-amplifying set up they have, and if you don't complain you're just going to get more and more stressed out by it.

Best of luck OP.

Calandor · 18/04/2022 01:42

Yes YABU. Unfortunately they can do what they want in their garden. That's what neighbours do. I understand it's annoying and different but you can't make them not play music or have the doors open with the TV on.

expat101 · 18/04/2022 04:44

We also live rurally and ended up with a collection of dwellings nearer to our home than what was here when we bought the property. In our area Council don't have to notify you of new developments and a number of small dwellings have no consent either, but house extended family members.

Noise travels extensively when living rurally, and up to a certain point, residents suck it up... things like tractors, farm animal noises, fertilising aircraft and the like.

when it comes to people moving in though, it seems the belief that moving rural from town means you can do what you like and be done with it.

Neighbours have recently humanely trapped a dog and sent it to animal control that was allowed to wander of a night time despite numerous comments on community pages action would be taken.

Getting back to human noise though, I called Council out to an excessive human noise issue and the new residents got the surprise of their life that they couldn't undertake what they were doing.

It didn't win me any friends, but they were never going to be personal friends anyhow.

The reason why I was quick off the mark this time was due to giving another family decent warnings their conduct (amplied live concerts and abuse of equipment when Mum wasn't home) was unsatisfactory. One family member late at night let his kids scream through a microphone.. and I do mean scream.

His appalling behaviour still occurs from time to time although it's stepped back a lot from how it used to be, and the family member still tries it on when he has overdulged in either alcohol or weed.

So, give them a call when their noise reaches an unsuitable level, if they continue get onto your Council. I was told we were supposed to keep a log of the times and dates as well so they could chart how often it was occurring. It helps if others will support you and also hear the racket.

Momijin · 18/04/2022 04:50

I live in an estate and my garden backs on to 4 gardens. 1 has 2 young kids and another regularly has grandkids and other family. As soon as there is good weather, you hear people having bbqs music, laughter, shouting, crying. It's part and parcel of living here and it doesn't bother me.

My dad would not be able to stand it which is why they live in a very quiet area.

expat101 · 18/04/2022 05:11

Also having support in the neighbourhood gives a sense of relief too. I work from home and had a rare meeting finish up when the aforementioned neighbour started up.

One woman leaving here was a professional associate of the landowner and could not believe her ears, I remember saying to her, do you think that's at a reasonable level? Her answer was a resounding NO!. Naturally we had been made out to be the whinging arseholes of the area.

The more people who experience what you do, and who have your back, is absolutely priceless for your sanity. It is very hard to explain to others who don't experience ongoing unnatural noise levels what it's like to live with-in your own home. It's different if someone chooses to live near a pre-existing high volume area like a main road, airport, or school, but when something comes to you, who live in a quiet area, then something needs to be done.

TigerLilyTail · 18/04/2022 05:42

Happy to accept if I am being unreasonable, but to put it in perspective I am inside with the windows closed, my kids downstairs watching TV, and I can hear the neighbours and their TV louder than what’s inside my own house.

This isn't regular noise. It's excessive!

I said before upthread but you can buy a decibel monitor for around 20 pounds and keep track of the noise. If you approach the council with decibel levels rather than just saying their TV and talking is too loud, I suspect they will take you more seriously.

Hopingforabagofbuttons · 18/04/2022 05:46

BoredZelda

If you didn’t want to hear neighbours, you should have gone for fully rural.

No , why should Op have to go fully rural. She was there first.
The selfish neighbours who think it’s ok to have tv and loud music blaring out in their garden, without thinking about anyone but themselves are in the wrong.
Your comment is pathetic

godmum56 · 18/04/2022 05:49

@Calandor

Yes YABU. Unfortunately they can do what they want in their garden. That's what neighbours do. I understand it's annoying and different but you can't make them not play music or have the doors open with the TV on.
actually no they can't. There are laws and by laws about noise nuisance
milkyaqua · 18/04/2022 06:10

I think when you inform the council about the excessive noise, the polite requests ignored, and mention the (illegal) setup which is exacerbating the noise, they will do your work for you.

People who make planning permission breaches are really arrogant, stupid, and entitled and will not respond to normal requests for consideration of others.

whiteroseredrose · 18/04/2022 06:29

@Mrsmch123

Wonder if my neighbours hate me..... I always have my double doors open and play music. We have family over on nice days chatting and enjoying the sun.
I would hate you! Chatting and bellowing not an issues but the music would be a nightmare.
Patchbatch · 18/04/2022 06:45

@Mrsmch123

Wonder if my neighbours hate me..... I always have my double doors open and play music. We have family over on nice days chatting and enjoying the sun.
Yes I expect so, the music not the chatting. I used to live next door to someone who would do the same whenever the weather was nice, horrible being subject to their crappy music when people want to also sit outside and enjoy the weather.
Sswhinesthebest · 18/04/2022 08:40

@Feelingpoorly123

There’s nothing wrong with playing music in your garden during the daytime imo
Oh you are one of “those” as well 😡😡
Sswhinesthebest · 18/04/2022 08:40

@milkyaqua

I think when you inform the council about the excessive noise, the polite requests ignored, and mention the (illegal) setup which is exacerbating the noise, they will do your work for you.

People who make planning permission breaches are really arrogant, stupid, and entitled and will not respond to normal requests for consideration of others.

This
Benjispruce4 · 18/04/2022 08:41

Depends on the music imo.

ImAvingOops · 18/04/2022 09:11

What can a council actually do about noise though? If the neighbour owns their house the council can't evict them. Councils don't even seem to deal with planning breaches a lot of the time

Courtjobby · 18/04/2022 09:12

Sounds like the planning permission they were given may have been to prevent this know Nd of sound amplification?

Courtjobby · 18/04/2022 09:13

That was meant to say "kind of sound amplification*"

Nothappyatwork · 18/04/2022 09:19

@ImAvingOops

What can a council actually do about noise though? If the neighbour owns their house the council can't evict them. Councils don't even seem to deal with planning breaches a lot of the time
Fine them in the same way as paeking violations
CuddlyCactus · 18/04/2022 09:24

@ImAvingOops

What can a council actually do about noise though? If the neighbour owns their house the council can't evict them. Councils don't even seem to deal with planning breaches a lot of the time

Council's issue enforcement orders if people are in breach of noise regulations or planning violations and if people don't comply then they can take them to court.
Then if people ignored it they would be in breach of court order and dealt with by court system.

Can take a long time and whether individual councils do this is another matter. Some are much more on top of planning violations than others.

Gonnagetgoing · 18/04/2022 09:39

@Norgernert - I’d report them for that breach.

I do think many people over the years seem to have a sod you attitude (like the NDNs who moved next door to my house) and think they can have loud parties etc whenever they like as it’s their right. No it isn’t their right! When I was a child and lived in a house where we had a large garden the normal family noise is expected but whenever we had parties we told neighbours and stopped after a certain time and kept volumes reasonable. I’ve carried this behaviour onto my living in my own properties.

I used to work for a solicitors (have said this before on other threads) and we rarely dealt with this issue but we had the knowledge of what you could do or not do legally and what recourse you could take.

I’ve known people who have lived next door to nightmare neighbours (I did once but it was only for 6 months must’ve been lucky otherwise!) and some have been worried to complain in case it makes selling their house harder. One single mum was intimidated by her neighbour whenever she left the house, snarling dogs, loud parties/gatherings with revving motorbikes etc and he eventually sold up! Her kids were a bit scared as they were both under 5.

So yes, take this seriously.

Northernsoullover · 18/04/2022 09:48

@ImAvingOops

What can a council actually do about noise though? If the neighbour owns their house the council can't evict them. Councils don't even seem to deal with planning breaches a lot of the time
First you'd send them a warning letter. If that doesn't work an officer would try to witness the noise or might install noise monitoring equipment. If its decided that it's a statutory nuisance then they would be served a notice. If they breach the notice it might go as far as a prosecution which can result in a hefty fine.
Northernsoullover · 18/04/2022 09:49

Ps they would investigate as its a statutory duty. Completely different department to planning.

expat101 · 18/04/2022 10:15

Our area they send our sub contractors to issue a warning and then seize the equipment which owner has to pay a fine to pick up at a later date.

expat101 · 18/04/2022 10:16

Out ^

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