Page 39 | To not have bought eggs for DSCs?

eggsbenedict82 · 2022-04-17T11:16:22+00:00

Long story short, DSD (10yo) and DSS (8yo) are being dropped off here later by DH's ex. The whole visit was arranged with short notice, and only briefly rushed past me, as DH knows I have been busy preparing Easter for our 3yo DS. This morning, after DS had opened his eggs, DH asked where the DSCs eggs are so they can be set up for later. I told him I had not bought any, and when he got indignant I said it's as simple as they're not my DCs, they're his, it's not my fault he's waited until Easter day, when no shops are open. Not my responsibility, but as per usual, I've been cast as the wicked stepmother - happy Easter, hey? [hmm]AIBU

user47000000000 · 17/04/2022 17:24

Oh ffs. OP. Don’t feel bad. It’s hard enough being a stepmum without all the bashing here. Yes it probably would have been easier to get some when you got for DS but it’s NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.

Happy Easter xx

Ellie56 · 17/04/2022 17:24

@eggsbenedict82

Has he noticed his eggs are missing yet?

aSofaNearYou · 17/04/2022 17:24

@CandyLeBonBon

But *@aSofaNearYou* the op clear DOES make a big fuss of Easter because she's been planning her special Easter plans for DS, for weeks.

You don't think much of Easter? Great! Op clearly does, hence the excessive arrangements for her ds.

Yes but she's not their parent. It's perfectly normal to defer to the parents on how they approach special occasions with their kids.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 17/04/2022 17:24

Did the thought of buying them pop into your head and you decided against doing it or mentioning it to your DH because you knew he wouldnt buy them and you wanted to see him fail at their expense? That's so cruel to those poor kids if so.

This thought flashed through my mind as well.

Moochio · 17/04/2022 17:25

@Mickarooni

Who prepares for weeks for Easter for a toddler yet fails to pick up a £1 egg for 2 step children?! 😂🤷🏻‍♀️

OP? And I bet if she got a £1 egg for them someone would moan it wasn't enough as she did more for her own child.

Moochio · 17/04/2022 17:26

But the EX WIFE went to the effort of buying for the new DC! and?

CandyLeBonBon · 17/04/2022 17:27

@aSofaNearYou well if you genuinely think that, that's up to you.

Cherryblossoms85 · 17/04/2022 17:28

If he'd asked you, yabu. As he just assumed you'd sort his shit out, yanbu.

00100001 · 17/04/2022 17:28

Also can't get over how she's "gone over budget" for a 3yo Easter.... Small easter egg hunt isn't more than £3 less if you want.

3yo have no notion if Easter meaning presents, so it's easy to just not have them...

LBFseBrom · 17/04/2022 17:29

@2pinkginsplease

Who normally buys their eggs?

Surely you could have picked up 2 extra eggs when you picked up your own child’s egg?

Or maybe you both should have discussed it before now.

I thought the same. Of course you are not obliged to buy Easter eggs for your step children. I would have reminded husband to choose eggs, a few times. Maybe you did and it fell on deaf ears.

However I absolutely love choosing and buying Easter eggs so I would have thoroughly enjoyed doing so for stepchildren.

vivkensington · 17/04/2022 17:29

It was unreasonable that your husband made no attempt to sort/check it was sorted.
However my neighbours (who rarely see my children) got my children eggs, family friends also randomly turned up with eggs. I would hope you would at least think of them, especially if you are getting stuff for your child. It speaks volumes neither of you brought it up before. Poor children.

Cheesecake53 · 17/04/2022 17:29

@steff13

I would have bought them for all the kids in our family if I were the one buying them.

I would have too.

Moochio · 17/04/2022 17:29

@00100001

Also can't get over how she's "gone over budget" for a 3yo Easter.... Small easter egg hunt isn't more than £3 less if you want.

3yo have no notion if Easter meaning presents, so it's easy to just not have them...

If OP wants to spend money doing something fun for her child that is her perogative.

PersephonePomegranate · 17/04/2022 17:30

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aSofaNearYou · 17/04/2022 17:31

[quote Unsureaboutit9]@aSofaNearYou the OP does buy for other people for Easter, she also makes a big deal out of Easter, she’s also made it very clear she’s done this to prove a shitty point to her husband. She normally buys his kids eggs. She’s also very clearly enjoying winding people up on here so she’s bound to get negative comments.[/quote]
She makes a big deal of Easter for her own child and has a mutual understanding with her sister.

Personally I make somewhat of a deal of Easter but only for my own kid. That's normal, I don't expect others to buy for her either and tbh I wouldn't really want them to because she'd end up with too much chocolate.

She's not proving a shitty point to her DH, she's proving a vitally important one (arguably more so than how much bloody chocolate the kids get). She didn't say she "normally" buys them eggs she says she's been expected to before. That's not really the same thing and it doesn't make that expectation reasonable then or now. If she has an ongoing dispute with her husband about him leaving too much to her then it stands to reason he should have twigged by now she's no longer willing, that discussion should not need to be had over every new thing he decides to leave to her. When would it end?

She's not "very clearly" winding people up, you see it that way because it is winding you and your sensibilities up. She's had a massive pile on and I doubt very much she's enjoying it, perhaps deflecting from the excessiveness of it all.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 17/04/2022 17:31

“Current child” and “previous children”. Really? That’s how you see it? That’s where you are unreasonable. Though I also think spending weeks organising Easter for your DS whilst not even bothering go put an extra couple of eggs on the Asda shop for your step children was also unkind.

FruitToast · 17/04/2022 17:31

The problem I have with this is you didn't think just to pick up a couple of eggs for the DSC to have when they should have been coming over when scheduled anyway. We live a fair way from our family and get presents for birthdays/Christmas/Easter etc at random times. It doesn't have to be on the day. I also don't understand how it was a financial thing when it sounds like you've gone all out for the other children in the family. To my mind there is a reason you are being labelled the wicked step mum. Clearly you don't view DSC as part of your family and are deliberately excluding them.

funinthesun19 · 17/04/2022 17:31

Well unless men can gestate babies, and bodily autonomy was not a thing, then yes, she chose to have a baby. Her body, her choice etc.

I know exactly what you’re insinuating here. Wow.

00100001 · 17/04/2022 17:31

@Moochio yes, it's fine. But don't complain about going over budget in "these times if financial crisis" when actually a 3yo would be perfectly content with a small 50p Easter chocolate.

Ooaapaulmcgrath · 17/04/2022 17:33

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00100001 · 17/04/2022 17:33

@FruitToast

The problem I have with this is you didn't think just to pick up a couple of eggs for the DSC to have when they should have been coming over when scheduled anyway. We live a fair way from our family and get presents for birthdays/Christmas/Easter etc at random times. It doesn't have to be on the day. I also don't understand how it was a financial thing when it sounds like you've gone all out for the other children in the family. To my mind there is a reason you are being labelled the wicked step mum. Clearly you don't view DSC as part of your family and are deliberately excluding them.

"The problem I have with this is you DH didn't think just to pick up a couple of eggs for the DSC "

There. Fixed it for you.

nearly8 · 17/04/2022 17:33

@aSofaNearYou

You knew he had children when you married him so you actually have 3 children whether you like it or not.

Eeerm no. There are 3 children in the family, OP has 1.

No she has three children - although from her actions she obviously sides with you.

If, God forbid, something happened to their mum she would share full parental responsibility for those children as delegated by her partner. Would she object to them living under her roof? Honestly, some people need to seriously check themselves before entering into any form of blended family if they can be so selfish and heartless towards children.

funinthesun19 · 17/04/2022 17:35

But the EX WIFE went to the effort of buying for the new DC!

That was entirely her choice. Nobody is expecting her to buy anything for op’s dc.

aSofaNearYou · 17/04/2022 17:35

*No she has three children - although from her actions she obviously sides with you.

If, God forbid, something happened to their mum she would share full parental responsibility for those children as delegated by her partner. Would she object to them living under her roof? Honestly, some people need to seriously check themselves before entering into any form of blended family if they can be so selfish and heartless towards children.*

No, she really, really does not. Unless she adopts them they are not her children.

Honestly, some people need to seriously check themselves before talking out of their arse about something they clearly do not understand.

Bananarama21 · 17/04/2022 17:36

The more you post the more of a piece of work you come across, your under tones suggest you tolerate those children at best its an awful experience for a child going to a home where their df new wife is less than tolerate of them. If I was the mil I'd be furious at the way you spoke about my grandchildren.