To not have bought my team easter eggs..

[M00cow]

Hello,

I have recently had a promotion at work and now line manage 6 others. The increase in pay only works out to be about £8 a day compared to a big increase in workload/responsibility (I say that because its hardly like im suddenly earning a fortune). I have also only been in this role for 2 weeks so haven't even received my first payslip yet.

However, i have had several comments from my team this week about Easter eggs...pointing out that other managers had bought their staff one and when was I going to do the same. Some of these comments came across really sarky and it has made me feel quite bad for not buying any! It hadn't even crossed my mind tbh and money is tight at the best of times.

I suppose my AIBU is am I being mean for not buying a team of adults (older than myself) an Easter egg when I'm very newly in this role? Or do they need to grow up? Half tempted to go to the shops now and try to pick something up for tuesday because I feel guilty!

Thoughts please

So I by no means think this is something you need or have to do. I'd be inclined to do it to get off on the right foot with new colleagues.... although saying that, I'm stubborn and on principle may decide not too. I think that would be cutting off your nose to spite your face though.

It wouldn't have ever occurred to me to expect an Easter egg from someone at work!
I don't know what type of work environment you work in... I have always worked in offices and in my last place people used to bring some sweets or chocolates for the team back from holidays (not managers just team mates), sometimes someone might bring a selection tin at Christmas or something but I've never worked anywhere where that's an expectation from managers, never seen that at Easter time.

@Beautiful3

I would buy a box of mini egg chocolate bars and hand them out. They're only a pound each.

I definitely wouldn't, if they have such an entitled attitude, all it will do is enable appalling childish behaviour.

They know where the nearest Tesco is, they can go and buy their own bloody Easter egg!

I wouldn’t expect someone who has not even been in the role a full month to be thinking about Easter Eggs. I get motivating people but there’s a massive difference between expecting someone who has been in a role a relatively short time to get Easter Eggs out of the blue than someone who has been there a month. Very entitled and thoughtless towards a new manager.

I'd buy them - it's petty as fuck, and I've never heard of an adult been given an Easter egg as a gift from work in my life. However, if that's the culture, then that's the rules you have to play by.

It will be held against you forever otherwise

Our manager always got us a cheap Easter egg , a nice gesture but I’d rather have not got, it as the chocolate was rubbish

Tell them to grow up.

It depends on the culture of that company. I worked somewhere where they often rewarded us with chocolate and treats throughout the year. It helped with staff morale and low turn over. Most staff were willing to be more flexible for the company. You say that other managers will be buying their teams an egg. Well your team are probably going to be disgruntled and less accommodating if you go against this culture. You don't have many to buy for, 6? Personally it's worth spending £6 to keep everyone happy.

How old are they, five?

If I received an Easter egg I wouldn’t appreciate it, we have enough of them in the house!
I think they are testing their boundaries also.

Someone above hit the issue on the head. It's not about the eggs at all. In some organisations pay rates, promotions etc are out of the control of the manager. They are fixed and immovable. The only way to show gratitude to your team is with small tokens. Easter eggs, Christmas cards, birthday morning teas (everyone bring a plate), flexibility with hours etc. If you're in a public service industry, public funds cannot be used on personal costs eg flowers, chocolates etc.

People notice the small things. The small things won't make a shit manager a good manager. They will however, build good will for a good manager. Again, it was noted above that the goodwill from an easter egg is entirely disproportionate to the cost of the egg. Such a small thing, combined with other small things (eg acknowledging someone did a great job on something) fosters a positive environment. The more people feel noticed and appreciated, the more likely they will go out of their way for you when needed.

@k1233

Someone above hit the issue on the head. It's not about the eggs at all. In some organisations pay rates, promotions etc are out of the control of the manager. They are fixed and immovable. The only way to show gratitude to your team is with small tokens. Easter eggs, Christmas cards, birthday morning teas (everyone bring a plate), flexibility with hours etc. If you're in a public service industry, public funds cannot be used on personal costs eg flowers, chocolates etc.

People notice the small things. The small things won't make a shit manager a good manager. They will however, build good will for a good manager. Again, it was noted above that the goodwill from an easter egg is entirely disproportionate to the cost of the egg. Such a small thing, combined with other small things (eg acknowledging someone did a great job on something) fosters a positive environment. The more people feel noticed and appreciated, the more likely they will go out of their way for you when needed.

This!

I will be honest this thread has surprised me with the amount of people who don’t realise that small acts of appreciation go a long way when it comes to employee engagement. There is plenty of research out there about how beneficial for productivity and reduction of attrition if people feel valued and appreciated.

For some it will be a simple thank you, for others it will someone offering to help them and some even appreciate a token gift. Doesn’t make them grabby or a child but just how the feel their contribution is valued. As pp’s have said pay rises and promotions are often than not outside the line managers influence but they have to deal with the fall out of disengaged staff.

So spending a tenner on creme eggs doesn’t seem a bad trade when it avoids conflict or HE issues down the line

We were given seeds to plant as a gift. I think we were told it was basil but it turned out to be tomatoes.

@AintNoPartyLikeANumber10Party

Unless you manage a team of 8 year olds, buying them an Easter egg would be weird and patronising. You are their line manager, not their mum. Start as you mean to go on: thank them for their feedback, and tell them it’s not how you do things. And that you do not expect gifts from them either; it’s work, not a social club.

we get Easter eggs every year. Also Christmas chocolates, random pizza days, McDonald's breakfast and the odd Starbucks

We appreciate and respect our manager. My horse died, he took down the photos of her from my desk so I didn't see them when I came back in, and then left me alone except for silently putting a Starbucks coffee on my desk

We also have a birthday club and secret Santa

I should add that we also give back. Manager will always say no on a Starbucks run (he doesn't want us to pay for him) but we always get him a drink
I've bought him a random gift before just because I knew he would love it. He did

So spending a tenner on creme eggs doesn’t seem a bad trade when it avoids conflict or HE issues down the line

You're off your rocker if you think £10 worth of chocolate is what it takes! That's just a sticky plaster.if used as an avoidance strategy,

No, what it takes is good quality management, modelling good behaviour as a leader and ensuring your staff aren't worked into the ground or denied their employment rights.

That's what keeps people motivated and why I have people wanting to join my team, because word travels fast who the good managers are, and the priorities they set, and it isn't a crème's egg, I can guarantee you that!

People send me their resumes to join my team too @daisychain01. I've got more people wanting to join my team than I have opportunities / vacancies. My last team of 16 gave me a "best manager we've ever had" card after we all got moved around in a restructure. I asked a lot of them and they delivered. We had an amazing team culture in an organisation that was in the papers due to a toxic and bullying culture. I know how to build positive cultures and high performing teams. They don't come from an attitude of you are paid to be here, why should I say thank you for doing your job.

As I noted above, small tokens don't make shit managers good managers. But a little recognition and thanks goes a long way.

@M00cow - the idea sounds somewhat bonkers to me

But there again if it's a "Thing" other managers do I probably would follow suit, if only to just get on good terms with my new team.

@k1233

People send me their resumes to join my team too *@daisychain01*. I've got more people wanting to join my team than I have opportunities / vacancies. My last team of 16 gave me a "best manager we've ever had" card after we all got moved around in a restructure. I asked a lot of them and they delivered. We had an amazing team culture in an organisation that was in the papers due to a toxic and bullying culture. I know how to build positive cultures and high performing teams. They don't come from an attitude of you are paid to be here, why should I say thank you for doing your job.

As I noted above, small tokens don't make shit managers good managers. But a little recognition and thanks goes a long way.

Your last paragraph is exactly it. I know it’s a sticking plaster if there are fundamental issues but small acts of appreciation can make a difference

And like you @daisychain01, I got the highest % score in my department in our latest line manager effectiveness survey so I mustn’t be completely “off my rocker”. I am a good manager who knows there are little things that can bring a smile to people’s faces when things (that are completely out of my control) are going bad around us

@daisychain01 - I’m with you there. I had a manager once who was vicious but bought in cakes. They absolutely did not build team morale and those small acts of appreciation did FA. I’ve had other managers who have been far more effective and none of them needed to bring in chocolate to let us know how much we were appreciated - I’d far rather work for people like that than poor or average managers who dish out sweets.

I line manage three people. It has never occurred to me to buy them an Easter egg and they would never ask or drop hints because they're adults in a professional role! I do get them a card and a box of chocolates each at Christmas though, but I do that because I want to.

CaptainMerica culture?? Rules?? I'm sure op didn't sign up to this ridiculous 'rule' and she doesn't HAVE to do anything she doesn't want to. I'd much rather be appreciated by other actions, like telling me I've done a good job, or a friendly good morning or how are you. My manager bought us all a small candle for Christmas and a card which was sweet but she's a pretty crap manager if I'm honest and I'd rather she just learned to do her job properly

@AskingforaBaskin

My work really is like a little family

Toxic work environment 101

Is the money spent coming from the company or peoples own pockets?

How so?

It might be if we were in office and too close/reliant/in each others pockets, but we're remote across 3 continents/4 time zones!

In our case, freebies come out of the company kitty, but our direct managers extra efforts come out of her own time.

Was never a thing or expected in olden days but now every occasion is over commercialised and an entitlement. I guess I would buy some token ones or a tub of chocs to share? The main issue seems to be they seek validation and some higher giving? A token of something would go a long way even though, yes, it shouldn't be expected. X

I have always bought my teams easter eggs and Christmas gifts from my own money.

At one company other managers came in thinking they had missed out on company money to spend :)

But, I am well paid and have always had great staff, so it has never felt a chore.