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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not have bought my team easter eggs..

324 replies

M00cow · 15/04/2022 08:00

Hello,

I have recently had a promotion at work and now line manage 6 others. The increase in pay only works out to be about £8 a day compared to a big increase in workload/responsibility (I say that because its hardly like im suddenly earning a fortune). I have also only been in this role for 2 weeks so haven't even received my first payslip yet.

However, i have had several comments from my team this week about Easter eggs...pointing out that other managers had bought their staff one and when was I going to do the same. Some of these comments came across really sarky and it has made me feel quite bad for not buying any! It hadn't even crossed my mind tbh and money is tight at the best of times.

I suppose my AIBU is am I being mean for not buying a team of adults (older than myself) an Easter egg when I'm very newly in this role? Or do they need to grow up? Half tempted to go to the shops now and try to pick something up for tuesday because I feel guilty!

Thoughts please

OP posts:
AintNoPartyLikeANumber10Party · 15/04/2022 08:32

Unless you manage a team of 8 year olds, buying them an Easter egg would be weird and patronising. You are their line manager, not their mum. Start as you mean to go on: thank them for their feedback, and tell them it’s not how you do things. And that you do not expect gifts from them either; it’s work, not a social club.

Wiredforsound · 15/04/2022 08:32

Is the average age of your team 6? Of course you shouldn’t be buying them Easter eggs out of your own money.

Soundofshuna · 15/04/2022 08:32

I have never bought eggs as a manager ( do so Christmas presents and meals out etc) No have I received any until this year when all the managers have been given fudge, cream egg & 3 little eggs by members of our team. Maybe it’s suddenly become a thing?!

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 15/04/2022 08:33

In a company I worked for, many years ago, the 'Company' bought all women staff an Easter Egg but not the men!

I wonder if they still do that and if they do, do any men identify as a women for a day to get an egg!

containsnuts · 15/04/2022 08:34

YANBU. It's unnecessary for a group of adults in the workplace. I'd maybe have got a bunch of daffodils for the office to mark the occasion and left it at that.

RedRobin100 · 15/04/2022 08:34

A manager buying team Easter eggs?! That’s BS, OP.

If you want to do anything buy some communal buns for the last day. Otherwise tell them to grow up and ask their grannies

Haus1234 · 15/04/2022 08:36

If it’s usual at

MummyInTheNecropolis · 15/04/2022 08:38

My work did a raffle - everyone was given a ticket (for free, no money involved). Every ticket was a winner, some got a creme egg or a little bag of mini eggs, others got massive Easter eggs. It was a nice thought and was done fairly. Might be worth considering in future.

SirChenjins · 15/04/2022 08:38

In all my years of being a manager I’ve never bought my team an Easter egg - good grief, imagine telling your boss you’d like them to buy you chocolate! Just say no, OP, but maybe do small gifts at Christmas? They sound very childish.

Haus1234 · 15/04/2022 08:38

Posted too soon!

If it’s usual at your workplace and everyone else is getting one, I can see why your team might feel less appreciated by not getting one (which is pretty bad for morale!). My old company used to buy one for everyone (but not individual managers, from some kind of central budget) and everyone loved it. I do miss it a bit at my current job, even though it is better in nearly every other way.

Funkyslippers · 15/04/2022 08:38

They're being very childish. Do they actually expect this tradition to carry on indefinitely? And you didn't even know about it so there's no need for the sarky comments. I couldn't get worked up about not getting an Easter egg. My kids would if I didn't get them one but these are grown adults ffs. And to ask when you're going to get them?! If someone asked me that, my answer would be, when they stop being so entitled! I can't imagine speaking to my manager like that

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 15/04/2022 08:39

@Wiredforsound

Is the average age of your team 6? Of course you shouldn’t be buying them Easter eggs out of your own money.
But clearly it's normal at that workplace as all the other managers bought eggs and the team has clearly received eggs every year in the past.

I think posters are getting too fixated on the idea that "chocolate eggs are for kids" - it's not about the egg it's about what it represents - it's a small thank you and a token of appreciation.

I'm a dog walker and a few of my clients got me eggs this year. I didn't expect it but I really appreciated the gesture as it shows they thought of me Smile I'm not six years old either Wink

EdgyNeonAnt · 15/04/2022 08:42

Adults are expecting Easter eggs at work?! And complaining when they don't receive them? YANBU, OP, YANBU at all.

ImanAccountant · 15/04/2022 08:42

We've always got Easter eggs from the management in the nhs, usually an out of date crème egg or a Tesco one but it's nice to feel appreciated

Comtesse · 15/04/2022 08:43

I have worked for 25 years and no one but no one has ever bought me an easter egg at work. It is not a “thing”, no manager is expected to buy eggs for their team. Sweets or a box of doughnuts on a Friday sometimes is good, but sulky comments because they didn’t get an easter egg? Ffs, they should get a grip. And @tanstaafl is right on the money - you might need to buckle up as well.

Yogity · 15/04/2022 08:44

I worked in an office where the Directors bought Easter eggs, advent calendars and occasionally coffees for the staff but it was a small tight-knit firm. Everyone above trainee level generally took them home for their kids

YANBU. I wouldnt bother buying easter eggs now but would maybe get a box of doughnuts for a fiver some Friday if not buying Easter eggs will yield a childish response

YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 15/04/2022 08:45

I’ve always done it. Easter egg, advent calendar, heart shaped chocolate around Valentines - in fact, I do Friday Treats if we’re in the office. And always buy the first round (and don’t expect one back). Pretty standard in my industry.

gogohm · 15/04/2022 08:46

I got a malteaser bunny from my boss, they are 50p. Sometimes it's the thought that counts

Highlights12 · 15/04/2022 08:47

Not really. You've only been in job 2 weeks.

Iamnotamermaid · 15/04/2022 08:49

Never in my 20+ years of working has any line manager bought me an Easter egg. I was chuffed when one of them used to send me an happy birthday email. It was an exception.

Occasionally we would get team teas/coffees if we were doing a team task for a day but that was it. Or pizza if working late (like midnight).

Manage their expectations- sounds like the team are experimenting with boundaries.

OnlyTheTitosaurusOfTheIceberg · 15/04/2022 08:49

I bought my small team a Lindt bunny each last week, just a sudden random thought when I was doing some shopping on my lunch break, because it’s been a tough year and I thought it was a nice gesture as a thank you. They certainly seemed to appreciate it and I agree with others that unless you’re absolutely on the breadline, it’s worth spending a few quid now and again to build team morale and goodwill. Ideally I like to do it at occasional random times, so e.g. a couple of days after they’ve pulled together to deliver something challenging, I’ll buy them each a bag of Buttons or something as a thank you. It doesn’t have to be expensive or flash, I think they just appreciate seeing their contribution has been acknowledged and knowing I’m grateful to them for going the extra mile.

Vsirbdo · 15/04/2022 08:50

It’s the norm in my workplace; just the £1 ones

Bedsheets4knickers · 15/04/2022 08:50

We get an Easter egg but I do work for a leading supermarket so it's def not coming out of anyones personal pocket .

alwayscrashinginthesamecar1 · 15/04/2022 08:50

I used to work in a hedge fund bank and we got a huge egg every Easter. Also a box of chocs on Valentines day, a hamper every Xmas and a kids xmas party with presents for all staff kids. The perks were fab but it was a shit place to work apart from that!

If I was you I'd buy some cheap eggs, just as a goodwill gesture. Or leave a big bag of mini eggs in the kitchen.

RewildingAmbridge · 15/04/2022 08:51

I have a team of 15, there are two others in my role or similar in my office and the whole team of practitioners is 40, we have been on a public sector pay freeze for the best part of ten years. My team work so hard in a difficult field, they're not even provided with tea or coffee.. we tend to do little gifts at certain times just as a small recognition of how hard they work, we all got our teams an Easter egg only the £3 ones from Tesco (on offer at £2) just put a selection on a desk and they picked their own. Of course it came out of our pockets. A bag of mini eggs each would've cost you £6 or you could've taken in some chocolates and hot cross buns for everyone to share over coffee. Small gestures often mean a lot to staff. Ours wouldn't have said a word if we hadn't, but they were so chuffed over something so simple, IME it's worth it unless you work for a huge corporate where everyone is paid a fortune and have free food and drinks etc in the fancy canteen. Then it's a bit redundant