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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

OH lied about extra day on away.

153 replies

Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:09

OH is going on a stag do to Benidorm in may, which is fine, he told me months ago but no exact dates. Told me the dates yesterday which were Friday to Monday but now today he said he’s going Friday to Tuesday (him and one other pal, the rest of the stag do are coming back Monday) because the flight back is cheaper Tuesday. I could tell he was lying so I checked the flights and they are the same price both days. I told him I’d checked and asked why he felt the need to lie, if he’d just said I’m staying an extra day I would’ve been ok with it but the lying really ps me off!! He’s pd off with me now because I checked the flights and didn’t just believe him. AIBU?

OP posts:
steff13 · 15/04/2022 00:10

You don't trust him, and a relationship doesn't work without trust.

Original poster
Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:17

I do trust him and I’m not the type to tell him he can’t do this and that etc which is why I’m annoyed he lied, he’s no need to lie.

OP posts:
crackingreward · 15/04/2022 00:18

@Beccylouuu

I do trust him and I’m not the type to tell him he can’t do this and that etc which is why I’m annoyed he lied, he’s no need to lie.

How can you trust a man that lied to you?

RunningRainbow · 15/04/2022 00:18

@steff13

Surely you mean relationships don't work when one person in them is a liar Hmm

dissertationhell · 15/04/2022 00:19

Maybe he wants some romantic one on one time with his friend before he gets married iykwim

user1471457751 · 15/04/2022 00:19

Has he admitted he lied? Flight prices do change so its not inconceivable that the Tuesday flights were cheaper when he booked.

Jedsnewstar · 15/04/2022 00:19

he’s no need to lie

If this is true and he knows it then I would be a little worried.

TheBatKeeper · 15/04/2022 00:20

A lie needs two good legs to stand on.

He barely had one, he can jog on.

BananaSpanner · 15/04/2022 00:20

YANBU and the reason you checked is because you knew he was talking crap so don’t let him make you feel guilty over that.

Why is he so keen for the extra day?

Luredbyapomegranate · 15/04/2022 00:21

I know a few people (male and female) who add an extra night onto work trips, not for dodgy reasons, just a bit of peace and quiet. (I may be one of those people Grin.) Could it be that?

steff13 · 15/04/2022 00:21

This reply has been deleted

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Hertsgirl10 · 15/04/2022 00:28

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Message deleted as it quotes a deleted post.

Original poster
Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:31

Yeah he admitted it when I asked him then said he can’t believe I checked and then said he’d ring me later (he’s working away). It wasn’t even a fully thought through lie which is how I could tell, he just sort of added that bit on at the end.

OP posts:
Original poster
Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:34

I wouldn’t have thought so, he works away so he spends more time away than at home!! We’ve not had a holiday in 18 months and he’s not had a lads holiday since December 2019 so I would not begrudge him an extra night in Benidorm. Just pissed off he felt the need to lie 🙄

OP posts:
Original poster
Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:39

I guess the extra day is because 3 nights isn’t long enough for him! Which I understand, he wouldn’t get there till late Friday night so it would only be 2 full days if he came back the Monday. Just annoyed he lied and wanted to check I’m not being a crazy bitch before I speak to him again ha

OP posts:
Original poster
Beccylouuu · 15/04/2022 00:45

Sorry, this is my first post, I’ve tried to reply to comments but failed miserably 🤦🏼‍♀️😂

OP posts:
Blanketpolicy · 15/04/2022 00:55

@Beccylouuu

I do trust him and I’m not the type to tell him he can’t do this and that etc which is why I’m annoyed he lied, he’s no need to lie.
Why did you check if you trust him?

How can you trust him when he lies to you and then blames you for checking?

RoyKentsChestHair · 15/04/2022 01:27

You aren’t a crazy bitch - we rarely are. Women get called crazy and bitches when they stand up for themselves and don’t allow men to manipulate them. He’s a liar and that’s on him. Your reaction to being lied to is entirely appropriate so don’t let him convince you that you’re the problem here.

JoyDivisionOvenGlovesx · 15/04/2022 01:34

You can swear on here, btw. No need for all the .

Sweary, swear away.

NowNowDermot · 15/04/2022 02:33

I'm no help because I would feel exactly as you do for exactly the same reasons but I've no idea what I would do in your shoes. I hate this kind of pointless lie, it breeds so much mistrust and for what? He could have just said 'I'd really like to stay another day, would you mind?' and, like me, it sounds like you would genuinely have been happy for him to go ahead. But he bottled it and told a half-arsed lie instead so now you feel like he's insulted your intelligence on top of being dishonest. You must be really disappointed in him OP Sad

Moser85 · 15/04/2022 02:33

@JoyDivisionOvenGlovesx
Doesn't it block the swear words? I sweared recently and I thought it blocked them.

Test: Fuck

LampLighter414 · 15/04/2022 02:34

Is the other guy like his best friend OP?

NowNowDermot · 15/04/2022 02:36

I see your test 'fuck' Moser, there would be uproar on here if they blanked out the swearing, the threads would be like Swiss cheese Grin

Moser85 · 15/04/2022 02:36

Oh it doesn't Grin Grin Grin

OP i'd be pissed off too!

AChocolateOrangeaday · 15/04/2022 02:50

As a PP has said you clearly don't trust him or else you wouldn't have checked.

My DH goes away fairly often and it would never occur to me to check the flight prices if he had told me that.

But then I trust my DH implicitly.