Page 6 | Onlyfans etc. Grim or not?

notsureaboutTAAT · 14/04/2022 09:36

I've never been on there. I assumed it was just photos ? So women are posting video on sexual stuff for money ? I'm surprised that's allowed. Obviously I'm very naive .

Strictlyfanoftenyears · 14/04/2022 09:47

Yep, dont want to google it but what exactly is the advertised use for it? Is it like instagram without clothes? (I have no idea about things on it, but have heard of it)

10HailMarys · 14/04/2022 09:49

The people who put the content on are as bad as the ones paying for it

No, they are not. Not in a million years.

Ballcactus · 14/04/2022 09:53

[quote Maternitynamechange]@Ballcactus How can we separate pornography from sexual violence when the whole industry is built around exactly that? A vast majority of porn shows coercive sex and violence. Arguably it’s not sex at all but the big monetary hijacking of intimacy to involve violence against women.[/quote]
For the majority of easily accessible porn yes. Ethical porn no, there is a big difference. Sadly the accessible stuff that experts recon are being viewed by as young as 10 yr olds is very worrying. But here’s where the shame stuff comes in, if there was less shame around porn (which there should be) would the industry be supporting the creators rights, protecting the performers and people who consume it? It would need a lot of work but there are people trying to make this change in the industry. The violence against women is part of a way way way bigger issue and it’s easy to point just at porn as the issue but it’s bigger than that

carpepm · 14/04/2022 10:14

I have a family member who is on it, though she doesn't know I know. I am sure that she would belittle the men who are willing to pay for it, argue that it gives her economic control in a way that her care work couldn't do, and state that I'm a judgemental right winger for believing she's being exploited. In reality, though, while she likes to maintain an independent, outspoken persona, sadly, she is a very insecure and sad woman whose relationships with her family and friends have been unhealthy throughout her whole adult life, who has been a functioning drug user, and who has moved from job to job in this time - but has done more than enough to function and cope in terms of "society's norms" which is why she would be able to convince herself that she's not being exploited. However, can ever convince me that she isn't vulnerable, and if she had secure relationships with people around her, as well as proper financial security, that she would ever entertain the idea.

I am sure there are individual women who are fine on it, but a PP said, they damage the collective. My family member is not fine and it makes me really sad that a business model has normalised the commercialisation of women's bodies under the guise of "empowerment".

Rosebuud · 14/04/2022 11:49

@10HailMarys

The people who put the content on are as bad as the ones paying for it

No, they are not. Not in a million years.

I disagree, there is no blanket stereotype and I do believe some of those who put content on are as bad if not worse than those who pay for it. And by that I mean the z list celebs trying to glamorise it as a justifation for them doing soft porn.

These “celebs” are encouraging other women, as they go on social media and direct people to it, so they get more punters and declare it to be empowering, glamorise, and only positive. As they are trying to sell it, publicise it, to get more punters, And lots of gullible women think well if she can do it so can I.

You then get others, the woman referenced earlier being a case in point. Comparing herself to a lawyer or a surgeon selling their brain, trying to make if respectable, and crowing about the money she makes.

These content providers for me, are as bad, if not worse than the punters paying for it.

bubblesbubbles11 · 14/04/2022 12:24

".....(models, body builders, actors, cleaners, surgeons etc) just in different ways, and others sell their minds (lawyers, accountants etc)"

and

"In reality, though, while she likes to maintain an independent, outspoken persona, sadly, she is a very insecure and sad woman whose relationships with her family and friends have been unhealthy throughout her whole adult life, who has been a functioning drug user, and who has moved from job to job in this time - but has done more than enough to function and cope in terms of "society's norms" which is why she would be able to convince herself that she's not being exploited"

I think this ^^ is at the heart of it.

Whilst other jobs may have an element of "using" the body to earn money, things like OF infact ARE different from those types of jobs because of the real and insidious way they dilute the person's ability to have a real life loving relationship with another person (and a loving relationship with themselves come to think of it).

Pennox · 14/04/2022 12:53

@1forAll74

I watched a programme not so long ago, about Only Fans., and most of the women on there, and a couple of men, actually said that they like to be viewed being naked,or doing all the odd ball things that the punters ask them to do. they just said they liked exhibiting themselves sexually for others to view, and they got turned on by doing stuff.

How can you be so naive?

Its this for me: We live in a world where women’s bodies are a commodity that anyone can buy. We cannot separate that concept from rape, misogyny & abuse.

Pennox · 14/04/2022 12:56

and this: As long as women are prepared to sell their bodies for money, ALL women will always be seen as a commodity.

SolasAnla · 14/04/2022 13:11

HobnobsChoice
new women will do quite well but they won't maintain that level of subscribers. However if you then get people to sign up with your referral code you can earn referral fees making all those pieces in the mainstream media part of the grim pyramid scheme.

Thats called being a pimp.

Earning from the prostitution of others.

It's one big reason as to why pornography and prostitution is rebranded as "sex work". The one's doing the exploitation get to hide among those they exploited.

bubblesbubbles11 · 14/04/2022 13:13

"1forAll74

I watched a programme not so long ago, about Only Fans., and most of the women on there, and a couple of men, actually said that they like to be viewed being naked,or doing all the odd ball things that the punters ask them to do. they just said they liked exhibiting themselves sexually for others to view, and they got turned on by doing stuff."

Reminds me of some joke I heard way back about how prostitutes drum up business.

Often starting with:

Punter: "What's your name?"
Pros: "What would you like my name to be?"

ramenbomb · 14/04/2022 14:15

I know someone who is on it (not well though so I can't say anything about her motivations tbh). She has an Instagram account too apparently that is a way to grow your followers and get you noticed - obviously this isn't behind a paywall so anyone can see it.

I haven't seen any of the content but it seems to be very explicit videos and photos of her masturbating and/or performing sex acts on her boyfriend. I mean, each to their own, but they have a one year old and I wonder how their child would feel in years to come if they came across photos and videos of their parents having sex online 😬

She is also quite open about being a 'milf' and sells her breastmilk to punters which I can't help feeling really weird and gross about!

Pennox · 14/04/2022 14:33

That's rank. I couldn't respect any mother that did that with breast milk designed to feed her child, sorry.

I think we could all make cash on the side selling soiled knickers and old bras to weirdos on the internet but go why would you want to be involved in that world unless you were forced to?

There are so many women that are forced or coerced into abusive situations, into rape and prostitution, that any woman doing it voluntarily is selling out her own sex imo as it only perpetuates it for ALL women. Predatory men wouldn't rape and abuse women if they weren't bough up to believe that was what women are for.

PinkButtercups · 14/04/2022 14:36

No.

I think if you feel comfortable and it earns you money pretty good money at that then why not?

It's their body, their choice.

Pennox · 14/04/2022 14:39

so if your daugther came to you and said I could be a lawyer or a prostitute, you'd be equally happy with either?

User135644 · 14/04/2022 16:27

The patriarchy’s biggest achievement was to make women believe sex work / porn is empowering. It couldn’t be further from the truth and really all it does is an injustice for our own daughters. As long as women are prepared to sell their bodies for money, ALL women will always be seen as a commodity.

Prostitution is the oldest profession. It'll never go away.

User135644 · 14/04/2022 16:32

@EllaVaNight

I watched a programme not so long ago, about Only Fans., and most of the women on there, and a couple of men, actually said that they like to be viewed being naked,or doing all the odd ball things that the punters ask them to do. they just said they liked exhibiting themselves sexually for others to view, and they got turned on by doing stuff. if it's their choice to do it they will say they enjoy it as their "customers" may be watching so they're telling them what they think they want to hear. If they're being made to do it then they were probably forced to say it.

Or just fishing for more customers.

Rosebuud · 14/04/2022 18:16

@PinkButtercups

No.

I think if you feel comfortable and it earns you money pretty good money at that then why not?

It's their body, their choice.

So you’d encourage your daughter to take it up as a career choice?

LexMitior · 14/04/2022 18:20

@PinkButtercups

No.

I think if you feel comfortable and it earns you money pretty good money at that then why not?

It's their body, their choice.

Is this advice you give yourself and other women?

notsureaboutTAAT · 16/04/2022 07:46

Do these people show their faces ? I wouldn't fancy being stopped in tesco as the women from only fans doing sex acts on myself.

twinklystar23 · 16/04/2022 14:27

I looked on the ukpunter site that was posted by another poster. EVERY SINGLE ONE I read was sickening from describing the woman's body, her performance one mentioned how tight her vagina was (therefore warranting a positive review) another mentioned putting his hand on her throat, to choke her as her responses seemed fake. I'm feeling somewhat sick even writing this post.

totallyoutnumbered · 16/04/2022 14:29

Beyond grim

Ashton22 · 16/04/2022 17:24

I disagree that it’s grim.
Sex work is always going to be around whether you like it or not, and only fans gives the power back to the creators. Like Sarah Jayne Dunn from Hollyoaks, she was used by producers for years to sell ‘sexy’ calendars and hardly saw any profit from it; As soon as she started her only fans they wanted to shut it down. I think it’s hard to break into if you don’t already have some sort of social media following, but at least the women on there are creating their own content rather than being used by abusive producers in the porn industry.

Lunalae · 16/04/2022 18:21

It's an exceptional amount of money in exchange for good photography skills, fashion know-how and being pretty.

You don't even have to do nudes. Show nothing if you want.

And exceptional money brings exceptional freedom. Rich women don't have to post on Mumsnet about being unable to leave "DHs" who hit them, abuse them and shit up and down the stairs. Women with wealth don't have to worry about which low paid care role to ruin their life with.

If it's not for you, fine - no one's forcing you.

But for a few simple pics and some written content, the money is astonishing.

dipdye · 16/04/2022 18:27

Another one laughing at farting into jars

Betcha women don't pay for that