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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not allow DH to put a FOOTBALLING GNOME in the garden?

154 replies

UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 15:39

Just that, really.

I just walked into the kitchen to see this thing grinning at me from the table. It is a gnome in full Crystal Palace strip. DH intends for it to go in our garden. I thought he was joking but no, he's absolutely serious. Apparently it's to celebrate the fact that they've reached the semi-final of some football competition or other.

I have spent £100s on beautiful David Austin roses recently and thought we were going for a cottage garden vibe. Apparently not.

WIBU to LTB?

OP posts:
Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 16:58

@MrOllivander

Whack him over the head with it then bury him and the gnome under the roses? Too much maybe...
We are currently having the paving at the back of the house re-dug...

I will graciously permit the gnome. I'm sure I will come to love him. Plus it's good leverage for when I want some really expensive plants in the future Grin

OP posts:
StageRage · 08/04/2022 16:59

@StageRage

YANBU. Get this one shop.cpfc.co.uk/giftssouvenirs/gifts-souvenirs/novelty/3962_cpfc-bbq-gnome.html and the original won't look half so bad.

(is it a gnome in front of a urinal?)

Sorry - I mean this one shop.cpfc.co.uk/giftssouvenirs/gifts-souvenirs/novelty/3962_cpfc-bbq-gnome.html
NeverDropYourMooncup · 08/04/2022 16:59

I did something far less offensive to the general public with mine.

I bought him a personalised Plymouth Argyle strip. He doesn't wear it out of the house, but I did have to put my foot down about him wearing it to bed if he ever wanted to have sex again.

PeskyRooks · 08/04/2022 16:59

YABU! I just got my dad the West Ham one for his birthday!

Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:00

@StageRage

YANBU. Get this one shop.cpfc.co.uk/giftssouvenirs/gifts-souvenirs/novelty/3962_cpfc-bbq-gnome.html and the original won't look half so bad.

(is it a gnome in front of a urinal?)

Oh sweet christ on a cracker that's definitely worse.
OP posts:
ilovesooty · 08/04/2022 17:01

@wishitwasaduvetday

Definitely LTB. I almost had to divorce my DH when he wanted to have the large calendar on the wall in the kitchen that was themed to his football team. It did not match my kitchen. Fortunately he came to his senses and he put it on the wall in his office at work instead. What was he thinking ruining my kitchen with his horrible calendar! 😆😆 I completely understand where you're coming from OP! Definite grounds for divorce!
I've got a football calendar in my kitchen too. I'm with your husband.
Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:04

I would absolutely forbid football / sports memorabilia in the house, unless it's in a 'man cave' [boak] or office. You're correct @wishitwasaduvetday

OP posts:
cobblers123 · 08/04/2022 17:04

I have 3 gurning meercats with the slogan Gardening is Simples in my garden.

It came from my neighbour who died a couple of years ago so I keep it under the tree in his memory.

I'm so glad it wasn't a gnome in a football strip, I think I would have accidentally had to break it if it had.

ilovesooty · 08/04/2022 17:05

@UnnecessaryFennel

I would absolutely forbid football / sports memorabilia in the house, unless it's in a 'man cave' [boak] or office. You're correct *@wishitwasaduvetday*
How can you 'forbid' something in a house you own jointly?
Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:10

How can you 'forbid' something in a house you own jointly?

There can be no compromise on matters of taste, @ilovesooty.

OP posts:
lisaandalan · 08/04/2022 17:12

I presume it's his garden too, he should not have to ask if he's allowed he's not a child. X

RhubarbFairy · 08/04/2022 17:13

Alas, we have TWO framed West Ham kits. Both signed. They live in the upstairs hallway. I don't even notice them anymore.

I wouldn't mind either a West Ham (DH/DS2) or a Spurs (DS1) gnome though. They're a bit of daft fun. And the Spurs kit is quite tasteful really. I do feel your Palace colours pain.

SockFluffInTheBath · 08/04/2022 17:13

@lisaandalan

I presume it's his garden too, he should not have to ask if he's allowed he's not a child. X
It’s a light hearted thread.
MenaiMna · 08/04/2022 17:13

Sure he can have it in the garden...buried up to its neck behind a large shrub.

skippy67 · 08/04/2022 17:14

Thanks for posting the link OP. Defo going to get one for DH.

mostlydrinkstea · 08/04/2022 17:15

The single life means no gnomes, free range with the Rose catalogue and as many tender perennials as I can over winter. Also a kitchen full of seedlings.

Just sayin.......

Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:17

@lisaandalan

I presume it's his garden too, he should not have to ask if he's allowed he's not a child. X
But he didn't ask, hence my white-hot fury. X
OP posts:
londonmummy1966 · 08/04/2022 17:21

Don't worry - as soon as they're knocked out hang a banner with LOSERS scrawled across it and he'll soon get rid.

SpidersAreShitheads · 08/04/2022 17:22

My DM used to have a garden full of gnomes that she was very precious about. The next door neighbours used to get drunk, sneak into our garden (think old-fashioned low wire fences) and arrange the gnomes into circles or just generally move them about.

As a child I thought this was hilarious but my DM was FURIOUS. The angrier she got, the more they did it. She took to hiding behind the curtains in the bedroom and suddenly flinging open the window in a bid to catch them in the act. She never did.

This all still makes me laugh quite a lot.

Years later, my mum had this really naff owl statue thing in her house. My brother kidnapped it, and set up an email address from the owl, and kept sending her photos of it "on holiday". He did eventually return it. That was about 25 years ago too! DM wasn't impressed about this either - but again, although it was nothing to do with me, I did find it utterly hilarious.

My poor DM 😂

Hutchy16 · 08/04/2022 17:27

This is a really petty post 🙈 your husband is excited, don’t be a pain in the butt.

hangrylady · 08/04/2022 17:28

YABU. I love a gnome!

florentina1 · 08/04/2022 17:32

I think you should fully embrace the idea of a gnome. Then be so devastated when it is stolen, broken or spontaneously combusts, that only more roses will console you.

Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:34

@Hutchy16

This is a really petty post 🙈 your husband is excited, don’t be a pain in the butt.
Oh god it's SO tiresome having to explain the concept of 'lightheartedness' on MN these days. Are you this literal in real life?
OP posts:
Original poster
UnnecessaryFennel · 08/04/2022 17:35

@florentina1

I think you should fully embrace the idea of a gnome. Then be so devastated when it is stolen, broken or spontaneously combusts, that only more roses will console you.
Sneaky! I like it.
OP posts:
100problems · 08/04/2022 17:38

I was expecting something more hideous.

DH likes garden ornaments Hmmit's surprising how quickly they disappear under mounds of soil following vigorous digging. He's always saying it's surprising how the ground moves under their weight Wink

Just saying.