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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel like fucking crying?

419 replies

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 15:15

My partner has a stomach bug. He caught it off the kids and he's had a couple of accidents.

Came in from work today to find the house stinking of shit. It's everywhere - our bed is going to have to be replaced, the bedroom carpet is ruined, it's on the stair carpet and the hall carpet downstairs.

I've just spent 45mins scrubbing the (tiny) bathroom because there was shit literally everywhere.

Can't really afford to buy a new bed but the mattress is heavily stained, now on both sides. It's going to cost hundreds for that and the carpets. Genuinely feel like crying my eyes out. Probably not helped by the fact he's doing nothing to help (like putting his soiled clothes in the shower rather than just leaving them). I've got piles of washing to do still too.

Aibu to be utterly fed up?

OP posts:
oioimatey · 06/04/2022 18:13

Wtf am I reading here? I would absolutely blimmin' apoplectic at his behaviour, whether he's sick or not.

Camp in the bathroom for all I care. Don't shit in the rest of the house.

mamabr · 06/04/2022 18:17

You are absolutely not being unreasonable!
It's ok to have accidents but that's taking it to a whole new level.
He shouldn't be having accidents on the bed or the carpets and if he's that bad that he can't prevent it then he needs to wear an adult nappy.
It's totally unfair on you. It sounds like he's not trying to do anything about it, like putting puppy pads on the bed etc to stop it from staining.

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:22

I'll be honest, the bedroom carpet hasn't been cleaned yet. I'm borrowing a Vax and will do it tomorrow. It is soaked in spray carpet shampoo stuff and covered with bags though!

OP posts:
SummerHouse · 06/04/2022 18:26

I understand you've got to do what you've got to do op. But this has put me off hiring a Rug Dr. I thought the worst thing was the overwhelming smell of wet dog with last one we hired. Confused

grossnessewwww · 06/04/2022 18:29

Tell him to get off his lazy arse and do it himself.

Is he the DC dad? If not, LTB.

How could your be attracted to man who leaves his shit for your to clean up. How disrespectful of him.

SpaghettiNotCourgetti · 06/04/2022 18:30

I hope he's really abjectly sorry for making you do this. I would be beyond mortified if I ever shat my entire fucking house and left it to my spouse to clean up.

TwiggletLover · 06/04/2022 18:34

This doesn't make much sense. Our household all had neurovirus pretty badly. There was no shit anywhere in the house. Also we were capable of cleaning up any mess that was made. We had to be as there was no one else to do it. Your oh should be clearing up the mess he has made.

DrBrennerFan · 06/04/2022 18:35

I was poorly with stomach bug last year I went through pants tiny accidents nothing huge but made sure No mess was left, I cleaned up after myself.

daphnedoo12 · 06/04/2022 18:36

As an adult, if he is having this many accident he may need further medical help because I don't think that's normal.

I've had a stomach bug, they're truly awful so I do sympathise with you but I don't understand how an adult has had that many and why there would be faeces on the floor and around the house

winterchills · 06/04/2022 18:37

Sounds awful for you but if he is a grown man I genuinely don't understand how it can be all over the house 😷

AthenaPopodopolous · 06/04/2022 18:39

This could be salmonella poisoning, he needs stools tested. It’s a very dangerous infection and he will have no bowel control

Zazdar · 06/04/2022 18:41

Sounds awful for you but if he is a grown man I genuinely don't understand how it can be all over the house 😷

Roomba?

justforthisnow · 06/04/2022 18:43

That's not normal behaviour. He should have camped out by the loo if it was that bad. Does the Vax owner know their machine is going to be used to clean up someone elses infectious faeces?

AthenaPopodopolous · 06/04/2022 18:43

Scrape as much with a spoon and then get a carpet cleaner or rent one. Poor think OP

SummerHouse · 06/04/2022 18:46

The pile of it though. I can't get past this. It's not the splats of someone running for the loo. It's as though he has squatted and gone for it. Although he is clearly very ill. Yes, I zoomed in.

I think I would have to have a debrief with him in how this came to pass. When he is better of course.

How is he OP?

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:48

@SummerHouse

I understand you've got to do what you've got to do op. But this has put me off hiring a Rug Dr. I thought the worst thing was the overwhelming smell of wet dog with last one we hired. Confused
Don't worry, it belongs to my sister and will be well cleaned before I send it back! And yep, she knows what I need it for.

If I could get the carpet up and out by myself I wouldn't bother trying to clean it, honestly!

OP posts:
Herani · 06/04/2022 18:50

Oh god, the very thought that a rented carpet cleaner is being used for something infectious like this, let alone the fecal bacteria.

I do sympathise OP, but someone with diarrhoea that bad should know to camp out in the bathroom after one, at most two, accidents.

Herani · 06/04/2022 18:50

…or even a borrowed carpet cleaner

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:51

@SummerHouse

The pile of it though. I can't get past this. It's not the splats of someone running for the loo. It's as though he has squatted and gone for it. Although he is clearly very ill. Yes, I zoomed in.

I think I would have to have a debrief with him in how this came to pass. When he is better of course.

How is he OP?

He honestly seems a lot better! No diarrhea since this morning afaik. He looks better too.
OP posts:
WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 18:52

@Herani

Oh god, the very thought that a rented carpet cleaner is being used for something infectious like this, let alone the fecal bacteria.

I do sympathise OP, but someone with diarrhoea that bad should know to camp out in the bathroom after one, at most two, accidents.

It's not rented, it belongs to my sister and will be well cleaned before I send it back. Also have anti bac stuff that I can use in it.
OP posts:
SpaghettiNotCourgetti · 06/04/2022 18:55

He honestly seems a lot better! No diarrhea since this morning afaik. He looks better too.

Good. He can clean up with the Rug Doctor, then, can't he?

Name99 · 06/04/2022 19:04

Yes, now he's feeling better he can start cleaning can't he.
What was he actually doing when you started cleaning, in the bathroom unable to get off the toilet or just laid there?

sophienelisse · 06/04/2022 19:09

I'd of rubbed his face in it and sent him into the garden.

Sorry op you have had a terrible day. I thought I'd had a bad day till I read this.

ThanksWineCakeGin

GingerFigs · 06/04/2022 19:10

Poor you OP. I'd want to cry too. Only coming to the tread now so missed all the suspicions that you were a poo troll!!

I hope when he is better he bloody well makes it up to you!!! I would be equal parts fuming and devastated at the mess.

Hugs....but from a distance in case you've caught it too!!!

NETSRIK · 06/04/2022 19:13

When a grown adult in my house shits all over the bed and floor the first thing I do is post on mumsnet and then take a pic.

People are seriously fucking weird.

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