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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel like fucking crying?

419 replies

WeirdlyKind · 06/04/2022 15:15

My partner has a stomach bug. He caught it off the kids and he's had a couple of accidents.

Came in from work today to find the house stinking of shit. It's everywhere - our bed is going to have to be replaced, the bedroom carpet is ruined, it's on the stair carpet and the hall carpet downstairs.

I've just spent 45mins scrubbing the (tiny) bathroom because there was shit literally everywhere.

Can't really afford to buy a new bed but the mattress is heavily stained, now on both sides. It's going to cost hundreds for that and the carpets. Genuinely feel like crying my eyes out. Probably not helped by the fact he's doing nothing to help (like putting his soiled clothes in the shower rather than just leaving them). I've got piles of washing to do still too.

Aibu to be utterly fed up?

OP posts:
housemaus · 06/04/2022 17:24

Agreed with PPs that he's been a selfish bastard, even if it's cos he's ill. He should have been sitting in the bath/on the toilet if he can't safely/hygienically be elsewhere - the SECOND I did one explosive shit on the floor I'd be in that bathroom and not moving.

I got food poisoning in Thailand a few years ago, I lived in a bathroom for 24 hours. DH brought me water and a duvet for when I felt I could sleep, and I didn't leave until I could do so without shitting on soft furnishings.

SniffMyQuiffyHair · 06/04/2022 17:25

He soiled both sides of the mattress? How?

A580Hojas · 06/04/2022 17:26

I don't want to know the details of the photo but has op really taken a thumbs up photo to try and prove something? Wasn't it cleared up before the thread was started?

dondon23 · 06/04/2022 17:27

This is disgusting and you're not being unreasonable wanting to cry but this is also not normal, even for someone with Norovirus.

What's he normally like when he's got a bug or is ill with something else?

EdithRea · 06/04/2022 17:28

He's either got fucking Ebola, or he's just a dirty fucker. Jesus, a grown manning shitting up and down his own stairs and all over his bed then sitting and watching while his wife scrubs it?

I think HE'S the poo troll. It's either a fetish or the world's biggest gesture of utter disrespect.

Honestly the amount of threads of men pissing in their own bedroom corner, shitting all over their sofas and putting on 'some incontinence pants', these aren't husbands, these are the subjects of documentaries for the rest of us to recoil at.

AnxiousHeffalump · 06/04/2022 17:28

@WeirdlyKind 👍🏻

chaosrabbitland · 06/04/2022 17:32

@nonsensicalmess

Lol at those who don’t believe it’s “normal” to poo this much - aren’t you the lucky ones to never have experienced this. The one time I have I genuinely thought I was dying, it didn’t let up from either end for 48 hours despite consuming nothing but water.

What I didn’t do however was move from the bathroom - I didn’t dare! In between “episodes” I just cleaned and bleached the best I could.

i agree , sadly iv had it more than once , to the point i dread nov time as thats when it starts being in the papers about cases rising , it really really does make you feel like your dying , honestly iv laid there inbetween being sick or on the loo and wanted to be in bloody hospital , and strangely when either dd or i have had it , it starts in the early hours of the morning , always struck me as odd that if i had the choice of the evil chest infection that i had about 3 years ago that saw me signed off work for 2 wks on 2 lots of antibiotics ,steroids and an inhaler , coughing so badly i was practically wetting myself or norovirus id take the chest infection every time ! at least theres cough medicine and stuff to treat it with , theres nothing for norovirus except suffer it out
marylou25 · 06/04/2022 17:38

I have seen a carpet like that before and I had to clean it, went out and bought a carpet cleaning machine! However it was my 88 yr old father with bad stomach bug who couldn't walk without a walker and even badly with that. He needs to stop eating until the bug is gone, liquids only, don't keep putting more food in the system! Still a bit odd though in a young I presume fit and mobile person.

Chely · 06/04/2022 17:44

Unless he blacked out from dehydration it was very shitty of him not to make more effort to get it in the pot.

When I had food poisoning there were no accidents, I kept it in until I got to the toilet because I'm not a baby.

LightSpeeds · 06/04/2022 17:44

I’ve slept in the bathroom before when I’ve had noro.

Yep, me too.

Lulu1919 · 06/04/2022 17:45

Dont let him sit on the couch !!!!!!!!

KateTheEighth · 06/04/2022 17:49

That looks like a direct hit rather than through his underwear/trousers

EdgeOfSeventeenAndThreeQuarter · 06/04/2022 17:50

Lucky you who’s never felt this grim.

I felt so awful once I slid off the toilet onto the floor and out the WC door . Naked. Into the hall. By the front door. The front door with a large glass panel. Which opened on to the pavement. By a 6th form college.

When you’re past caring that people are going to see your naked arse pressed up against the door, it generally means you can’t move.

My stomach cramped…

Not my finest hour and I cried and cried.

BackInBlackAgain · 06/04/2022 17:53

@A580Hojas

I don't want to know the details of the photo but has op really taken a thumbs up photo to try and prove something? Wasn't it cleared up before the thread was started?
No, op has done a thumbs up photo as people were calling her a troll and said to prove it’s a true thread by taking photos with a thumbs up sign

She can’t win, no photos, a troll, puts a photo up she is obviously trying to prove something.

You have my sympathy OP, I remember when my dog was a puppy and had a bad tummy, shit everywhere, the smell was vile.

aleedebo · 06/04/2022 17:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

saraclara · 06/04/2022 17:58

@LightSpeeds

I’ve slept in the bathroom before when I’ve had noro.

Yep, me too.

Lucky you to have bathrooms big enough to sleep in. And of course all these 'well you stay in the bathroom posts' are good advice once you KNOW you have a problem. If the first projectile noro shit takes you by surprise, that advice is worth nothing.

Once I'd had my own disaster, yes, I took precautions for if it happened again. But like OP's DH, I'd just gone to bed because I felt really ill. And then...

I'm starting to wish I hadn't opened up about when it happened to me. People here clearly think I'm the most disgusting and foul woman who ever existed. But for the poor guy's sake, someone's got to acknowledge that with the best will in the world, this CAN happen. Like I say, thanks goodness it was only once in an adult lifetime for me. I tried to clean up after myself, but my late DH recognised that I was way too ill to be able to manage it, and instead he comforted me and sent me away so he could do it.

Chonfox · 06/04/2022 18:01

Jesus that's awful... I've never heard of anyone having a stomach bug THAT bad. I'd be pretty pissed off with him to be honest. One accident I can understand but numerous times? Going around shitting like a dog and expecting someone else to clean it?! Envy Nope. There's no way I'd be cleaning that up no matter how ill my husband was he'd have to do it his bloody self!

TillyTopper · 06/04/2022 18:03

He's either so ill he needs A&E or he's putting it on and deliberately making it to the loo. Only you will know based on previous behaviour. If he didn't need A&E then no way would I clear that up, I'd leave him. End of.

Bananarama101 · 06/04/2022 18:05

Just waiting on your shit-splattered bedroom to appear on the Daily Mail website tomorrow now...

chocolateorangeinhaler · 06/04/2022 18:09

Put an adult pad on him.

Hire a carpet cleaner

Buy a new mattress

It's life. I once cried when the dog tipped over a bowl of water in the kitchen after I had washed the floor. It dried, it wasn't the end of the world. Your house won't stink forever, he didn't do it on purpose.

stuntbubbles · 06/04/2022 18:09

@Pumperthepumper

The link still isn’t working for me.
Let it go, let it gooooooo Can't hold it back anymore (like OP’s husband’s bowels)

Why do you want to see diarrhoea so badly?

whenwillthemadnessend · 06/04/2022 18:10

The only time this has happened to me was with my dog!!

I'd be fuming if he really can't make it to a bloody loo he needs to camp out in the bathroom.

Sapphireskies · 06/04/2022 18:11

How has he done it all over the house- he just needs to make it to the toilet?!

Pumperthepumper · 06/04/2022 18:11

@stuntbubbles somebody asked me a question about the picture. That was my reply.

ilovebagpuss · 06/04/2022 18:12

I dont understand really? We had noro whole house young children no one got shit all over the house?
Even if its running out of you surely clothes will catch it, pants and PJ bottoms?
As everyone else has commented you just stay in the loo if you have no bowel control at all? Like if i had an accident in bedroom I would contain it and grab towel not run up and down stairs making more mess.
I do feel for you having to clean it up.