Teachers- be honest please - do you judge or make assumptions?

[BlingLoving]

And if so, how often are you right?

eg when the kid turns up on day one with crazy curls, no hair tie (especially boys) do you immediately think, like I do, "oh no, this family is going to be a bit precious."

Or if the kid's clothes are consistently stained etc, do you chalk that up to parents having limited cash and taking view that school uniform is to be worn (my approach) or do you think they're just careless?

What about the ones who struggle to spend the time doing homework with their DC? Do you think they're just bad parents or are you sympathetic?

@FairyCakeWings please do enlighten me what a year 1 child should be reading if Harry Potter isn’t acceptable.

@Kanaloa It’s so frustrating!! I always buy or have the materials available for these projects and I expect my children to design and make with limited input from me. One of my children, spent 4 weeks on a project, an hour at least a night, the piece of work, for them and their ability was incredible. On the day of taking it in, her face was beaming…. Then she saw some of the others….. one was a WW2 bunker with a shop above, working lights, lamps, mini match sticks. My heart broke into tiny pieces for her. The 9 year old who made it, did nothing more than carry it into school!!!

😂

Believe me the teachers who know these kids won’t be fooled! When supporting at schools I used to always make the effort to encourage each child to talk about how they made it and make the point of praising the ones I could see had made the effort independently. Still disagree with them on a mora level but schools are obsessed with showcasing that school-home link with apparently no thought for the fact that this is a sensitive spot for some children. But what can you do?

@Bigblunder

I’m not a teacher but a parent and I’d love to know what teachers really think of the projects that most certainly have NOT been made by the child but by the parent!!! They are exceptionally good and stand out a mile! As a parent, I judge these people.

I judge the teacher who set such shit homework tbh.

I don’t like to think of people judging but unfortunately I see it every day. It is a shame that kids are assessed based on their name and manners- neither of which they choose. You behave how you are taught to behave.

My son has very straight hair which I spent four hours curling yesterday so the thought that he would be judged as “parent can’t be bothered and son is a hooligan” is amusing to me.

It's my job to look at children and assess them. I look at interactions with peers and adults, language, appropriately dressed, clean clothes (obviously within reason) decent warm clothing and footwear. I observe if they have a clean bed, where they sleep and who with, if they have a toothbrush. I don't expect all children to have designer clothes or matching bedding, I don't expect them to be clean all the time. I don't judge about their hair as long as it's nit free and clean but it's my job to judge and help if needed.

Why does a 4-year old need to wear a uniform - must their personality be whipped out of them at any cost?

I agree with uniforms.

It’s nothing about getting rid of their personality but it just makes everyone equal.

Many kids have only 1 or 2 changes of home clothes and they’re not designer, so coming in every day when their classmates have brand new expensive clothes on is just going to create a large gap between them which will lead to even more bullying and kids hating school.

@Kanaloa

Its confirmation bias. For every Chardonnay that "proves" you can perfectly predict how awful a child is, you'll forget the perfectly behaved Jaiydun and Pryncess

I also wonder if it’s a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy. Obviously if I keep sitting Castiel next to Dean eventually they’ll become friends, but was it destined? Or is it because I made them be friends.

Bit if a joke, but in seriousness, I wonder if that would apply to a teacher who is so judgey and nasty. If they treat Jaiden/Princess badly on the presumption that they’re ‘naughty kids’ obviously that child will then grow to dislike school and will feel themselves to be ‘naughty kids.’ I’ve never judged any kids on their names in any of my groups and there are some naughty Jacks, some naughty Olivers, some naughty Jaidens. Almost like the name makes no difference!

Of course it is. Most of the times you get from the kids what you put in. They're not stupid either, they can tell if you don't like it, put the bare minimum in etc. and then react accordingly,especially if they have other issues going on. It's a vicious circle , that has nothing to do with their name or even the behaviour sometimes.

I was working with a kid last year that hated school,refused to come in ,shutting down etc . His ability was very low and he was waiting for a place to special school so his original TA didn't see the point in putting the work in. He couldn't do it,didn't want to do it and soon he'd be gone and be someone else's problem. Took me a whole term ,but we finally established a relationship and trust. I wasn't going anywhere, he wasn't a lost cause and he was making some progress and started enjoying some lessons and activities. He loved to listen to me read to him(couldn't read himself) and ask him questions,him asking me,making the silly voices,talking about the book and links to his life and experiences etc. From a kid that hated books it became his favourite calm down/chill activity/reward.

Regarding names, it was fairly easy to predict challenging behaviour in both sexes!
Chardonnay would be a good example.

Not sure what dickhead poster said this but what a vile attitude to have - I really hope you don’t work in a school.

I know of 2 Chardonnay’s, both of which were lovely and very high achievers.

I’d love to know what your child’s name is because I can guarantee that there are other people like you out there that will judge your son (and you) on the name you gave him at birth.

It doesn’t make them equal though. The rich kids can afford better shoes, badges, underwear, trainers for PE, replacements for all of the above. All children can’t be equal financially, and the only thing uniform does is add more financial pressure to those who can’t afford it.

@Pumperthepumper and others, the policies teachers work under eg uniform are NOT under our control. Homework policy? Decided by the head or SLT. Don't judge the teacher's decisions until you understand just how restricted the amazingly creative, dedicated individuals that you are lucky enough to call teachers work under. In a few years they'll be gone as they'll be burnt out.

[quote Invasionofthegutsnatchers]@Pumperthepumper and others, the policies teachers work under eg uniform are NOT under our control. Homework policy? Decided by the head or SLT. Don't judge the teacher's decisions until you understand just how restricted the amazingly creative, dedicated individuals that you are lucky enough to call teachers work under. In a few years they'll be gone as they'll be burnt out.[/quote]
I’m a teacher.

Right. Lucky you for not being micromanage as much as we currently are. It is stifling.

Is it luck? Or is it just refusing to take a hard line on things that don’t work?

And actually I think binning uniform would increase inequality. At least within a uniform policy there's limited scope for elitism. Remove the uniform entirely and the label-rich (not necessarily cash rich) families would show off their Nike etc.

The best scenario would be to ban labelled uniform so that all families would shop at Asda, M&S or wherever to buy plain coloured uniform. No logos

By far and away the best thing would be to ask kids to come to school in unbranded joggers, T-shirts and hoodies. Comfortable, can be worn at weekends, washes easily, warm.

Sorry but I think it's not a priority currently. Far more pressing issues to address.

I try not to judge unfairly but you can't help it sometimes. It's not always judging but if I notice a child is unkempt, reclusive and not doing too well in class then it's usually a good indicator something is amiss at home.

Who said it was a priority?

Nobody but some of us are too busy firefighting to worry about uniform. 🙄

@Invasionofthegutsnatchers

And actually I think binning uniform would increase inequality. At least within a uniform policy there's limited scope for elitism. Remove the uniform entirely and the label-rich (not necessarily cash rich) families would show off their Nike etc.

The best scenario would be to ban labelled uniform so that all families would shop at Asda, M&S or wherever to buy plain coloured uniform. No logos

You're very naive if you think the inequality still wouldn't show.

Shoe zone £10 shoes that get tatty in a week vs sketchers or start rite or whatever. The shoe zone shoes vs the ones that are too small or falling apart.
Uniforms that are tatty or too small or have stitched up rips or just the rips. Or uniforms that are huge so the kids can grow into them or inherited from older siblings. Aldi vs M&S ... if you think kids are that obsessed with labels then it will also translate to where the uniform is bought from.

If schools really cared about it they wouldn't have uniforms that have extortionate prices or stupid colours or punishing a kid for wearing trainers because they school shoes are ripped.
They also wouldn't have so many non uniform days.

The inequality argument always falls short under scrutiny because it's been made up by idealistic grownups , unless every single child in a school get the exact same clothes and shoes,from the same provider.

@Invasionofthegutsnatchers

Nobody but some of us are too busy firefighting to worry about uniform. 🙄

What are you doing to improve your working conditions?

What do you suggest @Pumperthepumper? I'm all ears.

Of course we do! That's a big part of our job!
A child who tunes in regularly unkempt, matted hair and malodorous with a box of mini muffins for lunch screams a form of neglect.
A child who is clean, well groomed, homework done to a high standard and checked regularly, does not raise alarm bells.
Having said that , behaviour is the biggest indicator of any issues.

@Invasionofthegutsnatchers

What do you suggest *@Pumperthepumper*? I'm all ears.

Vote with your feet. Not happy with the homework policy? Refuse to set it. Not happy with the punishment system? Change it. Not happy with the level of planning? Don’t do it. Not happy with the assessments? Don’t do them.

Getting salty on mumsnet because people aren’t kissing your arse for the job you choose to do achieves absolutely nothing.