‘Look at you, you’re worth nothing’

[Whatsbooba]

Dp has just looked me up and down and said this nastily to me during an argument.
How would you react?

Well I wouldn't stick around for more. Abusive men don't change as they get older except to get worse, and if they don't like disobedient women, the teen years with a daughter are going to be fun fun fun.

You’re asking if it’s abusive, it sounds that way but only you know the full picture. Ask yourself if this was happening to your sister or friend what would you tell them to do?
www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/what-is-domestic-abuse/recognising-domestic-abuse/

If my partner said that to me, I would be making plans to leave as soon as possible.

He would not be my DP anymore.

He said something to crush you and dehumanise you. This is abuse.

Show him you value yourself and know your worth by leaving him.

That's not ok. Don't accept it.

So sorry OP - yes that is absolutely abusive

How would I react? I'd tell him that he's wrong, I'm not worthless and not willing to be with someone who thinks I am. Then tell him to leave

You and your toddler deserve far, far more 💐

Can you leave easily, OP? I don't mean emotionally, I mean practically.

If so, I would. If not, I would take all the steps to make sure that I could.

I'd leave, talking to a toddler like he is would push me to leave, let alone that comment. I hope you're okay, I know how devastating it is, I'm now out of my abusive marriage, it's soul destroying. Please leave and focus on yours and your child's happiness.

He would no longer be my DP. You and your child deserve so much better. I hope you’re able to leave not just emotionally but physically too. The last thing you want is for him to spout these vile things to your child aswell.

Tell him that either he sorts his attitude out and never ever ever says anything like that to you again, or he is out on his arse I’m afraid. What a dick

Oh OP, he sounds horrible and abusive. Your daughter is just a toddler doing normal toddler things and. She is already the target of his abuse. It will only get worse. . Free her of the bully, free yourself.

I would recognise him as a misogynist abuser.
Please don't stay with this prick.

I wouldn’t take abuse like that from a stranger in the street, let alone somebody who is supposed to love and cherish me. Any twat who treats you that way doesn’t deserve a second’s thought OP, let alone a share in your life.
Laugh in his face, kick him out tonight and never look back would be my suggestion.

My heart dropped when I saw that children involved in this “relationship”

Leave. If you can't do it for you, do it for your daughter.

He sounds like a horrible bastard.

@Whatsbooba
I'm so sorry you are going through this with P.
Handhold and a big hug.

Yes, it is most definitely abusive.

Leave.

He's putting you down, he's putting your daughter down.
She's learning that this is normal unless you show her that it isn't by removing yourselves from him, permanently.

It must be such an awful, negative place to be in right now. I feel for you and your daughter. You both deserve better. Make up your mind. Make a plan. Do what is best for you both.

He has no respect for you.
Leave.

He does hate, he’s told me he doesn’t like me anymore before and has said he’ll take Dd away from me. I remember not long after I’d had Dd he said I wasn’t a ‘Real woman’ what does that even mean?
I do feel I’m worth nothing, I have 3 extra stone I need to lose, I was good looking once…
I have so much resentment built up and we don’t get on, no matter what I say/argue about, I’ve never said hurtful things like that, he always does.

Good god, get your poor child away from that abuser, whatever it takes.

*Hate me

He's a proper big man, isn't he? Abusing women and babies? What a fucking prince.

He is wrong, you know. Just because he says something doesn't make it the truth, and you don't have to live like this. Take your lovely DD and leave him to his pathetic little life. You are worth ten of him.

@Whatsbooba

He does hate, he’s told me he doesn’t like me anymore before and has said he’ll take Dd away from me. I remember not long after I’d had Dd he said I wasn’t a ‘Real woman’ what does that even mean? I do feel I’m worth nothing, I have 3 extra stone I need to lose, I was good looking once… I have so much resentment built up and we don’t get on, no matter what I say/argue about, I’ve never said hurtful things like that, he always does.

It's so, so damaging to a child to be raised under the same roof as this dynamic - where they are witnessing you being the victim of a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship.

If you don't want to leave for yourself, you need to do so for your child.

Better they see you single but content, laughing with them, being happy, having kind friends and maybe in future a partner, than have to see this relationship any more.