To dread a party with "stand-up bowl food" ?

[Jng1]

RSVPd yes to a 'save the date' for a friend's significant birthday party.
Just had the details through and it's in a tiny cafe/ restaurant with a guest list of about 60. Looked at pics on insta of other private parties and people are packed in like sardines in a low-ceilinged single room. No stools or seats anywhere.

Food is described as grazing boards then stand up bowl food.

Am I alone in dreading this kind of social event - standing in uncomfortable heels, juggling a glass and a plate/bowl and not being able to hear anyone. Wondering how long I have to stay before I can discreetly disappear?

(Yes, I know IABU and I should have just politely declined, but I thought it would be a sit down/ buffet type thingie!)

Sounds like hard work. Can you be one of the first to arrive, spend some quality time, then do an Irish goodbye?

@HomeHomeInTheRange

Goodness, what a fuss.

Wear comfortable shoes
Eat something before you go if you can’t cope with the food
Have some drinks and enjoy talking to people.

This is good advice.

No to grazing plates. Yuk - Covid spreader but I love the small bowl food. I love trying small dishes of different food.

I would not fuss about what you wear. Trainers are the fashion. Get a pair of trousers shortened if necessary and stay as long or short as you wish.

Also take a cross body handbag and you have 2 available hands. 😀

Bowl food is a much better idea than a buffet, especially given the Covid situation.

I like being able to stand up and mingle at parties. I find it more sociable.

I think post Covid fewer people are wearing heels, certainly people I know are. So definitely comfy shoes to enable standing for longer. Heels won't do your bad back any good either.

Everyone's different, but this doesn't sound like a horrific event to me. If you really hate the idea arrive late and leave early just to show your face and wish your friend a happy birthday.

I'll go instead sounds like fun to me, I love buffets, grazing and mingling.

The first was just a "save the date" thing though, not an official invite.

So once the actual invite came through, OP could easily have declined if it wasn't up her street.

Still didn't send the details till after she said yes.
@fairylightsandwaxmelts

I agree Op, much prefer a sit down meal.

It sounds like the only thing to be gained from this would be sore feet and covid. Not seeing the appeal myself.

Sounds fun - and you don’t have to stay that lng. My problem though would be the likelihoof of getting covid

Stay five minutes, just long enough to greet and kiss the birthday person, take a couple of pics on your phone, then quietly slip out and go home.

Post on social media "GREAT birthday party for X" and nobody will ever know you left early.

@mycatisannoying

This is Mumsnet. It's pretty much a safe bet that this social event will be hated.

Yep, it's fun-sponge central.

I've got a neurological condition, so certain events are hard for me, especially anything with steps. I either have a quick word with the host beforehand, and check if there's a way to get round anything that will be an issue, or I don't go. What I don't do is get myself in a massive tizz because someone has the temerity to run an event that isn't perfect for me.

I just don't get the joyless MN attitude that it's a massive imposition to be invited to anything and the constant bitching if the event isn't exactly what you would like. If you don't want to go, don't go. But lighten up.

@Jng1

www.foodevents.co.uk/food/bowl-food/

I guess it's this kind of thing?

thats weird, I looked at the photos and it appears you have a traditional set out table but no chair! see photo from the site below

Sounds awful. Difficult to eat and not much for those drinking alcohol to soak it up!

I am so curious why this is such an unheard of concept. I think the only thing new is the name. This is standard in my area for corporate events, receptions, parties, fundraisers, and other events.

The most notable one I went served frito pies, a bag of crisps topped with chili and chili toppings eaten served in the crisp bag and eaten with a fork. Being as we were all adults we managed to eat them quite proficiently.

There will be plenty of highboy tables to set your drinks and bowls on, you can wander around as you feel like to chat with different people, you’ll be able to ‘lean’ on the tables, and there will be a few chairs about.

I guess I find it surprising that this many people wouldn’t be able to stand and walk around for a couple of hours.

@OverByYer

I'll go instead sounds like fun to me, I love buffets, grazing and mingling.

So do I (and being minging). If you live near me we can share a cab. :-)

@Mrsjayy

What's the difference between a buffet and grazing boards ?

A fighting chance of not having absolutely everything inedible due to cross contamination.

I’ve been to functions like this and it’s exactly as you describe. Not enough seating so you’re balancing food/drink in your hands etc. it’s like a reception but it lasts all evening!!
Fine for youngsters, not great for middle aged folk - my advice is don’t wear heels!!

@Jng1

www.foodevents.co.uk/food/bowl-food/

I guess it's this kind of thing?

How the hell are you supposed to eat any of those things standing up?? I hate stand up events anyway, I never know what to do with my arms 😂 (maybe hold my bowl, cutlery and drink at the same time?)

And I’m far from a fun sponge, but I hate standing up all night.

Gosh - didn't expect so may replies!

Just to clarify, the foodevents link I charged was just a random link for 'bowlfood' from Google - not the company providing the food! So I have no idea if it will be like this or not!

Definitely no room for chairs or dancing though. The cafe itself only has about 5-6 tables when it's open, so there wouldn't be room for anyone sitting down.
I've also just realised that the date is about a week before we go on holiday, so the covid risk is perhaps the biggest concern right now!

fighting chance of not having absolutely everything inedible due to cross contamination.

😃

I'm 5 ft 2 and no one has ever talked over me and I don't wear heels so you're being ridiculous about that. Sounds great, all together, snacky food, chat. A couple of hours standing, leaning against the bar etc isn't going to kill you, surely when you go to a party you stand up and talk to people otherwise how did you ever have the "people talk over me experience". If you don't want to go don't, but you're a rubbish friend making a nasty post to put down your so called friends event that she obviously is looking forward to.

@JustDanceAddict

And I’m far from a fun sponge, but I hate standing up all night.

Which is fine, but some people love this kind of event. It's impossible to host an event that works for everyone. Some people loathe sit-down meals, because they get trapped next to the same couple of people all night. You can't please everyone. MN is just a constant stream of miserablists, whinging that the party/wedding/event isn't perfect for them.

The very idea of grazing boards/tables makes me (not envy)

It’s grim, wasteful and needs to stop.

I was too old for standing all night when I was a student.
So it would be a no from me.