Washing my horse

[Pimpmypony]

I have a horse I hate grooming, especially when he's muddy. A friend has a mobile horse washing business and does the equivalent of dog grooming for horses. I booked her to come and wash my boy, and DH has thrown an absolute fit at the waste of money, claiming that because I "don't work", (I am SAHM) it's not for me to waste money on "frivolities".

FWIW, it has led to a row between DH and I, because he has told me that the allowance he gives me is not to be wasted on stuff I can do myself. I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable or not - I don't consider it any different to paying a dog groomer or a cleaner to provide a service. DH says that it's a total piss take and waste of his money.

I gave up my job to support his career, as he works long hours, hence being a SAHM. My horse is my only hobby/indulgence. Who is right here?

You have a pet, albeit a ride-on pet.

Why wouldn't you look after it yourself?

Yes people use dog groomers but that's usually for essential coat trimming , nail clipping and the like.
Dogs get muddy most days and you clean them when you get home.
Kitchens get grubby every day but you clean up as you go along, you don't leave a weeks worth of cooking detritus for a cleaner

Do you shit in the lav and leave it for a week for the cleaner?

Look after your own horse or, if you hate it that much, sell it to a family that would actually care for it and buy a share at a livery or a riding school where you could could ride and go.

I'm not even convinced this post is real.

Wash your own horse, woman.

Why? If she doesn't want to - should all the people who employ cleaners sack them too?

Doesn’t matter what it’s for you should have some money to do with what you want. He’s being very mean it’s not about the horse, it’s about controlling your activity.

This has to be a reverse or a joke

Why? If she doesn't want to - should all the people who employ cleaners sack them too?

Someone without a horse wouldn’t understand this. It’s not the same. In general, riding and grooming go hand and hand. Usually I would wash my horse when they are sweaty after a long ride. I groom her before I ride her. I wash her if she has been rolling in the field. These are things you do spontaneously as and when they crop up - it’s not the same as having your dog groomed once a month, because dogs are inside pets and horses are half in half out (usually). Not to mention they are also “beasts of burden” who allow us to ride them which has knock on effects. Would you take your dog for a walk and it gets muddy and wet and matted and then just leave it like that because it has an appt with the groomer next week?

No. Neither would I spill a glass of milk on the floor and leave it because my cleaner is coming in 3 days.

A horse is a serious time commitment and a lot of people just see them for the fun aspect eg the riding, and cba with the more “boring”
aspects. Some people don’t even rinse their bits post ride. It’s bullshit and it pisses me off

@Giraffesandbottoms

Why? If she doesn't want to - should all the people who employ cleaners sack them too?

Someone without a horse wouldn’t understand this. It’s not the same. In general, riding and grooming go hand and hand. Usually I would wash my horse when they are sweaty after a long ride. I groom her before I ride her. I wash her if she has been rolling in the field. These are things you do spontaneously as and when they crop up - it’s not the same as having your dog groomed once a month, because dogs are inside pets and horses are half in half out (usually). Not to mention they are also “beasts of burden” who allow us to ride them which has knock on effects. Would you take your dog for a walk and it gets muddy and wet and matted and then just leave it like that because it has an appt with the groomer next week?

No. Neither would I spill a glass of milk on the floor and leave it because my cleaner is coming in 3 days.

A horse is a serious time commitment and a lot of people just see them for the fun aspect eg the riding, and cba with the more “boring”
aspects. Some people don’t even rinse their bits post ride. It’s bullshit and it pisses me off

I do have a horse. I pay for full livery, including grooming, turnout, rugging, etc. Of course I can do these things, I just prefer to use my limited time with my horse on other things, like riding.

Not sure why full livery pisses you off so much.

What a strange thing to do - I presume this isn't a regular service? Paying a dog groomer is more akin to paying someone to clip your horse. Surely you groom before you ride every time? At least the saddle area as a bare minimum?!

Ok sorry. True MN style.

Do NOT under any circumstances google sheath cleaning, do not look at the pictures.

And if anyone ever thinks owning horses is glamourise, remember - sheath cleaning.

@gwenneh

If SOMEONE is doing these things, fine. I think it’s not particularly nice as so much of the grooming etc with horses is about bonding, but if it’s getting done daily it’s getting done. Lots of people don’t do it st all/no one is doing it. If you return from a
Ride and your horse is sweaty I assume
You would deal with that yourself?

[quote Giraffesandbottoms]@gwenneh

If SOMEONE is doing these things, fine. I think it’s not particularly nice as so much of the grooming etc with horses is about bonding, but if it’s getting done daily it’s getting done. Lots of people don’t do it st all/no one is doing it. If you return from a
Ride and your horse is sweaty I assume
You would deal with that yourself?[/quote]
The OP didn't imply that they were giving up grooming entirely either, just that they were paying for a one-off bath out of their "allowance".

When I come in from a ride and my horse is sweaty yes, it's dealt with -- sometimes by me, more often by the grooms. I'll do the cooling out, but they'll often be the ones to put him up for the night (I generally only get to ride after work, which has me at the yard quite late.)

You are 100% correct in that the horse needs to be groomed, either by owner or by paid arrangement, and not doing it at all would be unacceptable. I just don't think that's what this post is supposed to get us frothing about!

I can't see the point really

There's someone that comes to our yard and makes a real killing in trimming, mane pulling etc I just think it's so easy to do yourself why pay?

But horse washing 😵‍💫 surely he's just going to go and roll or lie in shit or piss 5 minutes after you've had him done? Grooming is good for their skin etc it's not a case of them being like a car and just having to have a wash and set on them once a month.

I don't agree that he should be deciding how to spend your money really but I do agree with him that it's a ridiculous waste of money. Plus I can bath my pony in about 20 minutes. If it was show prep then maybe but not just to clean him.

@gwenneh

I think it’s the use of the phrase “I hate grooming” in the OP that has got my back up. As I said in a previous post I know so many people who just don’t hose down a sweaty horse/don’t groom their horse properly etc (including a good friend of mine actually) and it’s upsetting and frustrating.

Loads of things are a waste of money. Today I paid someone to paint my nails. I'm on mat leave. I could hoover but I have a cleaner. I could clean my own car. I could cut my own hair. I could paint my own rooms.

It's your allowance. If he's going to police it I would get a job so you have your own money.

Who remembers washing tails with a Reckitt’s blue bag? Is that still a thing?

Only here for the deletion message

[quote Giraffesandbottoms]@gwenneh

I think it’s the use of the phrase “I hate grooming” in the OP that has got my back up. As I said in a previous post I know so many people who just don’t hose down a sweaty horse/don’t groom their horse properly etc (including a good friend of mine actually) and it’s upsetting and frustrating.[/quote]
That's totally fair and I would find that frustrating and upsetting too.

Washing is not a substitute for grooming.

Nothing spent on your horse is a waste of money. Everyone with a horse knows this.

[quote BakedTattie]@AgentProvocateur Google it and make sure you select images 😈😂[/quote]
FFS if you told me to jump off a cliff, would I? No! Of course not. So why oh why did I Google images of this, (whilst eating peanut M&Ms)??!!

@BakedTattie

Ok sorry. True MN style.

Do NOT under any circumstances google sheath cleaning, do not look at the pictures.

And if anyone ever thinks owning horses is glamourise, remember - sheath cleaning.

Too late 😱

FFS if you told me to jump off a cliff, would I? No! Of course not. So why oh why did I Google images of this, (whilst eating peanut M&Ms)??!!

I warned you.

Don’t Google dragon butter.

@TheAbbotOfUnreason

Who remembers washing tails with a Reckitt’s blue bag? Is that still a thing?

If you're old enough to remember them, you probably had proper canvas New Zealand rugs and jute rugs, and your hat was held on with elastic

@BoysDontCryOhYesTheyDo

Laughing at you watching it while watching peanut m&m’s.

If it’s any consolation, it’s been 8 months and I can’t get an app with the normal girl so looking likely I’ll have to do my geldings sheath cleaning myself this time. Dammit.

I put mine in the dishwasher