To expect family money being passed on

[Soffana]

Am I being AIBU if I think that parents that had an inheritance and profited on that when it comes to property investment should pass money on to the next generation and not spend it all?

That money should be passed on from generation to generation?

For example helping next generation buying property?

Nope, legally or morally they shouldn’t, it’s theirs to do what they want with.

[quote Soffana]@Blossomtoes

Not untouched. I mean spend the money wisely in property or university fees and try to make sure next generation can do the same.[/quote]
I’m not sure paying university fees is a particularly sensible way of spending an inheritance. I definitely wouldn’t have done that.

YABU. When someone inherits they can spend their money how they choose. It is their money. I would prefer my parents to spend evert penny and enjoy their lives. I didn't earn it and I don't need it.

@Siepie

Not squirrel away untouched, I mean more in the line of buying bigger property or paying off morgage that then would benefit your children.

@Blossomtoes Perhaps not, I live in a country where all education is free. But I think you understand what I mean in not being untouched but invested wisely for the benefit of your children.

Not a popular view on MN, where the wishes of the legator or testator are paramount, and to hell with family expectations, but the UK is, globally, a bit of an outlier when it comes to the requirements of a testator to make reasonable provision for their family out of whatever property is available at their death. Most jurisdictions restrict testamentary freedom to ensure that dependents' /descendants' interests aren't forgotten. Which seems reasonable to me.

No. Nice if they do, but everyone has to balance their own needs with the needs of the next generation. It's pointless to deny yourself to enrich your children and then need your children to bail you out. At the moment we are prioritising our pension, so that our children don't have to help us out financially when we are old. I certainly don't see that as being selfish.

I say that as someone who will most likely not receive an inheritance from their parents and who hasn't got a clue about how much they can pass on to our adult children. If I end up like my parents it will all go on care fees.

A single adult working full time living with their parents can save a good deposit in a couple of years.

And what year was that?

[quote Soffana]@Blossomtoes Perhaps not, I live in a country where all education is free. But I think you understand what I mean in not being untouched but invested wisely for the benefit of your children.[/quote]
That looks different for each person.

For lots of people, family holidays and experiences are a better investment of money than a house that could end up being a money pit in 50 years time.

Given that you're clearly certain you're right about this and will argue against any other opinion, I'm not really sure why you're asking if YABU.

However, YABU. Everyone's situation is different and there is no 'should' involved here.

Nobody in my family has inherited so much as a sack of beans in about 20 generations, but if my parents had inherited something, I would expect them to make their own lives better with it because it was given to them, not to me. I am not somehow more deserving of it than they are. I have a job and earn my own money.

@Whatever00

YABU. When someone inherits they can spend their money how they choose. It is their money. I would prefer my parents to spend evert penny and enjoy their lives. I didn't earn it and I don't need it.

Neither did they earn it. Their ancestors did.

@Pumperthepumper

A single adult working full time living with their parents can save a good deposit in a couple of years.

And what year was that?

2018. Do you want my national insurance number and mothers maiden name too?

You sound massively entitled. I don’t think you should be expecting anything to be passed on.

[quote HeadNorth]@godmum56 - why would you want to 'make sure I had spent every penny' rather than have your children receive a share of your moveable estate? Bear in mind, if you spent it on cars and consumables, they could still get some of it - why does that bother you so?[/quote]
there is a sector of my family (not a close one) where the adult chidren treated their remaining parent very badly indeed. Why should such people receive a penny or button from their parents?

No thanks.

Just a vague notion of where you (and your partner) bought this house for 150k four years ago with no help from anyone else.

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

My parents had a big inheritance.

Honestly... I look at it and feel a massive relief that if it is necessary there is money there for a decent nursing home.

This !

Morally, if its "only a few thousand" inherited then dont you have a moral obligation to gove that to someone for whom that would be life changing rather than fun?

Or is it only when it affects you?

Hahahahaha nope

@Pumperthepumper

No thanks.

Just a vague notion of where you (and your partner) bought this house for 150k four years ago with no help from anyone else.

West Midlands. It's not really a difficult concept to grasp that adults living at home can save a lot of money if they want to.

And @girlmom21 if you wouldn’t mind, the length of your mortgage.

I’m going to guess: small non-commutable town either in the east of Scotland OR the north west of England. Family help to buy, 35 year mortgage. Your house is now worth 15k more than you paid for it. You earn approx 25k and your partner 30k ish.

Also we sacrificed a certain quality of life in order to give our children some luxuries that enhanced their lives as dependants. You only get one life and why should we continue to do that forever? We intend to enjoy the small extras that we can afford and I would think we had failed as parents if our grown up children resented that.

@incognitoforthisone

Given that you're clearly certain you're right about this and will argue against any other opinion, I'm not really sure why you're asking if YABU.

However, YABU. Everyone's situation is different and there is no 'should' involved here.

Nobody in my family has inherited so much as a sack of beans in about 20 generations, but if my parents had inherited something, I would expect them to make their own lives better with it because it was given to them, not to me. I am not somehow more deserving of it than they are. I have a job and earn my own money.

I am quite certain about what I think and how I will do it. But I am interested in other peoples' opinions in this matter as I am in other things.

I also think there is a big difference in earned money and inherited money. Earned money - you've earned it, you can spend it. Inherited money - you didn't earn it yourself, let it be of happiness for yourself and future family.

Nope. Earn your own money and stop feeling so entitled to someone else's hard work.

I will want to pass inheritance to my children, as personally that’s what feels important. However no one is entitled to anything. I think the idea of inheritance being a moral idea is difficult. Really, morally, it’s not fair that some get no inheritance or while others get hundreds s of thousands is it??

I’ll get fuck all anyway….except a bill for a funeral….so I find it hard to understand the entitlement as I’ve always known I’ll get nothing.

West Midlands! What a cross post!