Page 6 | To be annoyed with vegan friend

Silversprinkles · 15/03/2022 23:24

@BeagleBeagled

Your poor friend, imagine if she reads this.

"Poor" friend?

Maybe she'll learn not to be so fucking rude to be talking about vomiting over her friends meal! She was gross, not the OP.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 15/03/2022 23:25

You've been very kind and accommodating to her sensitivities, but in reality she's just taking you for a mug.

Just eat what you want to - I would bet that you and her family are the ONLY people who bother about her "sensitivities" - so if she isn't lecturing other people eating around her about meat-eating, and she still manages to eat out, then she's just trying to coerce you into being like her, and you're letting her.

Eat what you want. Tell her that, while you sympathise with her feelings, you are not, in fact, a vegan yourself and if you fancy a bit of chicken or whatever, then you're going to have it.

tkwal · 15/03/2022 23:26

If I had a vegan guest to dinner of course I would make them vegan dishes but the rest of the party would be given whichever meat, fish or fowl I cooked. I don't have any problem respecting other people's choices and hope they would do the same for me. If a party had a vegan host I would happily eat whatever was offered

Psuedoshoes · 15/03/2022 23:26

As a vegetarian, YADNBU. Of course you should eat what you want. And from her side, she's not wanting to educate as she'd have went about it a totally different way if that were the case. She just wanted to be preachy and judge, and to feel superior.

MarchXX · 15/03/2022 23:26

@WheresTheJustice2

I tend to be sympathetic to her and order meat free dishes when we’re out together.

However we were recently at a wedding together and I hadn’t ticked the vegan dietary request on the invitation so was served the meat dish.

All throughout the meal, my friend kept commenting about my meal saying things like “I don’t know how you can eat that. Even just looking at it makes me want to throw up.”

I just kept eating and told her I forgot to tick the vegan request. But she kept on and on until I snapped and told her that I respected her choice to be vegan but I wasn’t.

Was I being unreasonable?

YANBU, OP.

Veganism is a particularly odious religious-like ideology that requires every friend to 'be' vegan in their presence, or else face an evening of passive aggressive comments .

A vegan would never, ever eat like an 'omnivore' when out with an omnivore, (nor would an omnivore expect a vegan to follow their dietary habits, because that's controlling and weird).

I find that vegetarians are completely accepting of omnivores though and never judgmental.

Threeboysandadog · 15/03/2022 23:28

My vegan nephew used to do this to my son. “Do you know that’s a pig you’re eating” etc but he had stopped it by the time he reached his 5th birthday. Tell her to grow up.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 15/03/2022 23:31

Funny, I always get those type of comments non stop when I'm minding my own business eating vegan food and not commenting on what other people are eating.
Still, whoever it is saying it its insufferably rude.

Silversprinkles · 15/03/2022 23:31

@WheresTheJustice2

Gosh I’m truly surprised that so many people think it’s controlling, rude etc. I honestly thought I was being a good friend by choosing to go meat free around her. It’s making me think about all the other things that I do to accommodate her, like meeting up closer to her house than mine because I drive and she doesn’t when actually it’s only a few stops further on public transport to meet halfway. Maybe I am a bit of a pushover

A bit? You think?

Try total mug, bless you. Definitely time to start asserting yourself!

sweetkitty · 15/03/2022 23:35

As a vegan myself YANBU your friend definitely is. I do not force my views onto anyone else that is rude. If anyone asks me why o am a vegan I tell them but I never ever comments on their meal or anything they are eating as it’s just rude and none of my business.

LifeExperience · 15/03/2022 23:36

My son is vegan. When we eat together he'll have a vegan burger and I'll have a beef burger. Neither if us comments on the other's food. It's called respect. Your"friend"should try it.

Silversprinkles · 15/03/2022 23:37

@Wiredforsound

“I don’t understand how you can eat meat.”

“You don’t need to understand how I can eat meat. You just need to know that I can if I want to.”

👏👏👏

CBFA · 15/03/2022 23:37

Wow, it's late so maybe I'm being short tempered and this is in no way directed at OP but some commentators, who are using this post to bitch about vegans. Because we all know that one person's vegan friend can be easily extrapolated to cover all living vegans on earth and their behaviour and unreasonable. Are you that fucking simplistic?

MarchXX · 15/03/2022 23:42

@Momijin

It is so hard when you're vegan for the animals and for the planet and having watched animals being tortured and murdered to be sympathetic about jane smith liking her steak and just needing to eat some cheese. Or just needing to have an egg (which means absolute vile torture to even free range chicken).

Tbh I wish vegans around me had been less indulgent and shown me the torture and murder that I was eating. Plant based is absolutely delicious and not missing out at all. So much more tastier and so much more healthier

Your comment makes no sense; animals suffer and die for every plate, even your vegan one. How else are your crops protected?

saraclara · 15/03/2022 23:42

@CBFA

Wow, it's late so maybe I'm being short tempered and this is in no way directed at OP but some commentators, who are using this post to bitch about vegans. Because we all know that one person's vegan friend can be easily extrapolated to cover all living vegans on earth and their behaviour and unreasonable. Are you that fucking simplistic?

Very very few posters have done that. In fact I can only recall one doing so.

Yet lots of vegans have posted in support of the OP.

RobertsRadio · 15/03/2022 23:48

With a friend like that I'd make sure to order steak tartare the next time I ate out with her.

jennytheonionslayer · 16/03/2022 00:12

I've been vegetarian for over 30 years, my body, my choice.

Likewise, what you eat is up too you, how dare she?

Tell this cunt to fuck right off, what an entitled twat.

She is a cunt, honestly, what a cunt....

SpilltheTea · 16/03/2022 00:23

I'd have told her to mind her own business and shut up. It's ridiculous that she's been allowed to control what everyone around her eats.

Justilou1 · 16/03/2022 02:38

There you go @WheresTheJustice2… she hasn’t been lecturing you because she hasn’t NEEDED to. She has controlled the narrative with the implied threat of “being upset”. She sounds like a fourteen year old.

BirdWatch · 16/03/2022 02:39

"She’s just very sensitive". No, she isn't. You are the sensitive one. You are kind and eat vegan in her presence, eeting closer due to her not driving is thoughtful, you being sensitive. You deserve the same respect, friendship is a 50/50 thing.

I don't know if she is always rude, but this time I think she was ill mannered, anybody who comments on what another person is eating is rude.

Glad you spoke up, hopefully she won't do it again.

BirdWatch · 16/03/2022 02:42

*meeting

SheepDogTed · 16/03/2022 02:51

I've been various degrees of vegan/vegetarian for thirty years and I have never questioned or made anyone feel guilty for eating meat. My food, my choice - your food, your choice. I think it's appalling behaviour to make someone feel bad about the food on their plate.
My children have been vegan/vegetarian/omnivore at various stages and again, their choice.

PinkSyCo · 16/03/2022 03:14

Of course you weren’t being unreasonable. Your friend was, and I don’t know why you put up with her rude and sanctimonious ways.

Bromse · 16/03/2022 03:22

Momijin

It is so hard when you're vegan for the animals and for the planet and having watched animals being tortured and murdered to be sympathetic about jane smith liking her steak and just needing to eat some cheese. Or just needing to have an egg (which means absolute vile torture to even free range chicken).

Tbh I wish vegans around me had been less indulgent and shown me the torture and murder that I was eating. Plant based is absolutely delicious and not missing out at all. So much more tastier and so much more healthier
.................
'More' nicer too, aye ;).

You're entitled to your beliefs, Momijin, and I admire vegans for putting their conviction into practice; however the fact remains that going on at people about what they are eating, whilst they are actually eating it, is very, very impolite. It's also childish but we can forgive children for saying exactly what comes into their heads because they do not have a filter, they have to learn tact and manners. Adults should know better than to say (the equivalent of), 'yeuch' or 'eewwww', whilst glaring with horror at the contents of a companion's plate.

In the op's place I'd have been inclined to say, "Go and sit somewhere else then" (but that would be 'more ruder').

LadyPropane · 16/03/2022 04:18

Or just needing to have an egg (which means absolute vile torture to even free range chicken).

Depends entirely on where your eggs come from. My eggs come from my backyard and I can assure you those chickens aren't remotely suffering.
These kinds of sweeping statements are unhelpful. People need to actually do their own research to find out how much harm their food is causing.

It really is not the case that vegan automatically= good and animal products automatically = bad. It's not that simple.

Suzi888 · 16/03/2022 04:24

Is is she always unreasonable? Does she mention your clothing/shoes/bags or just what you put in your mouth.
Why are there sooooo many vegan posts lately is it bash a vegan day again already 🤣.

I can’t imagine a grown adult would actually bring this up to be honest.