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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Aibu to wonder if Botox and fillers now normal?

463 replies

Av0bo55 · 13/03/2022 06:23

I’ve so so many friends that have these now and really do feel I’m the odd one out
Friends all between 30-45 and look amazing! I’ve got to admit I’m very tempted but a bit nervous and also Ttc one last time, so unsure if it’s safe to do if Ttc???
and should I wait! I’m 40 early next year so was thinking about maybe then!
So how many have tried /or already do it? What’s your thoughts? Good?

OP posts:

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Gonnagetgoing · 13/03/2022 15:00

@SummerBluez

You can always tell those who haven't had fillers or botox. Those deep wrinkles and saggy skin are a dead giveaway

@SummerBluez - yeah course you can. You certainly wouldn’t be able to tell with me and my friends. Amazing what good lifestyle does rather than get drunk smoke etc then do Botox etc to freshen up.

Clarabe1 · 13/03/2022 15:03

@SummerBluez I mentioned the anti ageing tips because long term they are more effective than a needle. Botox cannot undo years of sunbathing etc. Like I said each to their own and if it makes you happy and you feel better then good luck to you. I am not judging anyone who does it but my own personal opinion is that it never ends well.

Gonnagetgoing · 13/03/2022 15:04

@Huckleberries73

I really do love how women say - I can tell. You bloody can’t on ones that are done well. Yep - loads of bad ones about. But loads of amazing ones.

No one in my family or friendship group have noticed, I just look fresher and less tired.
I defy anyone to look at me and know it’s been done.

@Huckleberries73 - but if I meet someone eg in 50s/60s with very smooth forehead, plumped cheeks etc then there’s no way that’s natural. If I can guess that eg Holly Willoughby and Tess Daly have had Botox and fillers then I’m sure I can tell a normal woman too. It doesn’t actually bother me if you have work done, you do you and I’ll do me.

SummerBluez · 13/03/2022 15:06

@Clarabe1

But I didn't ask for them. I'm in my 20s, I haven't had Botox so I don't know why you're wishing me luck with it. I also wouldn't mock anyone who had.
Grown women hand wringing about other womens decisions just baffles me.

Ihaventgottimeforthis · 13/03/2022 15:09

As long as women are judged for how attractive they look, it will remain popular.
We will create a problem (labelling women as haggard tired stressed) and then sell a solution (inject botulinum toxin & acid into your face).
Perhaps it's because a lot of people are scared of getting older.
I wonder at what age do people then decide its no longer worth it?
Probably also social circles - I don't think any of my friends have had it, I wouldn't say for definite, but I'm rural & have a lot of 'outdoorsy environmental' friends, not really ladies who lunch types.

Original poster

Av0bo55 · 13/03/2022 15:12

Wow I didn’t expect so many comments!
I’m just having a read through now!
It’s definitely seeming very main stream and popular these days and I’ve noticed a lot of young celebrities, have had things done. some are obvious and others more subtle!
I do wonder how safe fillers and Botox are long term and what the long term effects are too!
I’d love to try it out - one day! as I am definitely feeling my age and have awful frown lines and headaches , I look angry 😆
And I think a more relaxed face would be a nice refreshing change

OP posts:

SuitcaseOfWhine · 13/03/2022 15:12

I have thought about Botox as I have very bad frown lines, can you just get rid of an entrenched frown line with Botox? I am happy to have lines elsewhere on forehead and around eyes, just want to stop frowning as it's giving me headaches and it is ageing. Will this help?

Would never touch fillers as I think that does lead to looking strange.

Crimesean · 13/03/2022 15:17

It's far more common than many people realise - if it's done well you shouldn't notice it.

I do see a lot of young women with fish lips that look awful and overdone, and those terribly obvious false lashes, but that's not really my preferred aesthetic.

I know women who've confessed they have them, and I'd never have known, they just look really good for their age, less tired-looking.

5128gap · 13/03/2022 15:18

[quote Clarabe1]@SummerBluez I mentioned the anti ageing tips because long term they are more effective than a needle. Botox cannot undo years of sunbathing etc. Like I said each to their own and if it makes you happy and you feel better then good luck to you. I am not judging anyone who does it but my own personal opinion is that it never ends well.[/quote]
How do you know how it ends? Genuinely curious. You're not drawing on your own experience as women who say the opposite are, so on what basis are you making such a sweeping statement? Fillers and botox are both temporary so they 'end' when they wear off and the person gets to choose whether to have them again.

Original poster

Av0bo55 · 13/03/2022 15:18

Same it’s my frown I hate
The headaches and the angry look I have 😆

OP posts:

BobMortimersPetOwl · 13/03/2022 15:29

The concerning part for me is how unregulated the entire industry is.

You can't just get a touch of laser eye surgery when you nip to the beauticians to get your eyebrows waxed. The same cannot be said of things like fillers, botox etc.

PandoraP · 13/03/2022 15:30

@SuitcaseOfWhine,yes you can get rid of frown lines with botox and reduce static lines. I had very subtle botox. It has reduced my ability to frown which feels great, but I left some lines as I didn’t want to go for the completely smooth forehead look which would have looked strange as I am 50.

whumpthereitis · 13/03/2022 15:33

Funnily enough, you can also look after your skin by keeping hydrated, sleeping well, using sunscreen, eating well etc….AND have Botox/fillers. It’s not either/or.

whumpthereitis · 13/03/2022 15:34

@SuitcaseOfWhine

Would never touch fillers as I think that does lead to looking strange.

Botox can lessen their appearance and stop them getting worse, but usually deep entrenched lines can be plumped out with filler if the aim is to get rid of them.

PinkSyCo · 13/03/2022 15:35

Thank you so much for trying to educate me @5128gap, even though you do come across as rather conceited and silly. It’s really stupid to compare getting a haircut to injecting (potentially unsafe) crap into your body and I wish people like you would stop trying to normalise it.

LauriePartridge4Eva · 13/03/2022 15:35

I used to get fillers and Botox but hated the restriction and spending silly amounts of money on temporary 'help' for my face. I cottoned on that it only works well for a time...as you get older and your body ages, particularly your neck and hands, a smooth, plump face looks so stupid. The neck is a massive giveaway.

I can tell easily when people have it...when I asked them quite a few were shocked as they thought it was so subtle and discreet. It IS, but because I went through years having it myself, it's easy to spot.

Allaboutyou222 · 13/03/2022 15:42

I’ve had Botox and fillers. Botox made me look refreshed. Fillers were for marionette lines which were really developing (in 50s). I really bruised. Looked ok but not sure would do it again. Once you start you realise there’s other stuff to be tweaked too!

Againstmachine · 13/03/2022 15:42

It’s really stupid to compare getting a haircut to injecting (potentially unsafe) crap into your body and I wish people like you would stop trying to normalise it.

Absolutely a hair cut is completely different to this and normalising it isn't helpful to the young women that you should look a certain way it's harmful.

I8toys · 13/03/2022 15:42

I'm 50 and I'm not vain enough to do it. Husband likes me - good enough for me. Young attitude but not young face - so what.

There are some faces where you know something isn't quite right but you can't quite put your finger on what it is - it just doesn't look normal. Maybe lips that stick out a bit more than they should and doughy immobile looking skin.

If it makes someone feel better about themselves then go for it but I could imagine it could be addictive and expensive.

Againstmachine · 13/03/2022 15:45

The concerning part for me is how unregulated the entire industry is.

Absolutely you can get any old idiot injecting into you after a training course and injecting toxins into you.

And yes Botox is a toxin.

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 13/03/2022 15:49

I'm 50 something and too vain to do it
I'm no Cindy Crawford but I'd be terrified of something going wrong and looking worse.

XenoBitch · 13/03/2022 15:50

I hope it never becomes normal. Things like shaven legs/armpits are considered the norm nowadays, and that just reinforces the idea that women have to look a certain way. If women are not allowed to have fine lines, or be able have a face that shows expression, then where does that leave those of us who could never afford to have these treatments?
And like a few others have mentioned, when you do you stop?

Gardeningcreature · 13/03/2022 15:50

I see lots of young women, well some may be not so young, with so much fakery it's shocking. Fake hair extensions, fake awful duck lips or as I call them cock sucking lips, fake orange skin, fake eyelashes, botox etc.
If a woman of a certain age doesn't have a line between her eyebrows then she has had botox that is the tell tale sign I then automatically start to look for other tell tale signs. I know I shouldn't care and it's non of my business but there are so many women who have lots of fake things about them. One or two tend to look ok but a lot of people seem to get more and more work done. They start off subtely then often move on to have more and more work done. I suppose maybe it's addictive.
Even my hairdresser who is in her 20s has lip fillers, eyelash extentions, fake tan, hair extensions, hair obviously dyed. It's noticeable that at first it was subtle now it's so obvious. In my opinion it's not improving how she looks but that's just my opinion.

whumpthereitis · 13/03/2022 15:51

‘And yes Botox is a toxin.’

And not harmful in the correct dosage. Opium, henbane and hemlock for example are all poisons, yet they’re also useful in medicine. Hell, taking enough paracetamol can kill you.

‘It’s a toxin’ really doesn’t mean too much.

Ihopeyourcakeisshit · 13/03/2022 15:53

@Againstmachine I think it's the world's most powerful toxin.

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