Aibu to wonder if Botox and fillers now normal?

[Av0bo55]

I’ve so so many friends that have these now and really do feel I’m the odd one out
Friends all between 30-45 and look amazing! I’ve got to admit I’m very tempted but a bit nervous and also Ttc one last time, so unsure if it’s safe to do if Ttc???
and should I wait! I’m 40 early next year so was thinking about maybe then!
So how many have tried /or already do it? What’s your thoughts? Good?

The argument that some celebrities have detectable work, ergo work is always detectable is nonsense. There will be very few celebrities who haven't had work. For women in that industry botox (and teeth whitening and straightening for purely cosmetic purposes) are just routine aspects of self care, like a haircut. When they claim to be natural they mean they haven't had surgery. People are just homing in on the ones where the work is poor and mistakenly believing they are the only ones to have had work.

[quote georgarina]@HamCob the people who look weird have either had more intensive cosmetic procedures or bad/excessive work.

Well-done Botox is literally just a forehead without wrinkles (for example). You wouldn't be able to tell.[/quote]
@georgarina but what happens when the rest of you is ageing and it inevitably does? Jowls bit of a saggy neck etc. A weirdly smooth forehead looks a bit bizarre then!

As far as I know I don't know anyone who has used Botox or fillers. I'm 60 and (celebrities aside) it seems to be younger women who are having these procedures rather than those my age.

It's a very depressing trend, in my view and the sooner it goes, the better.

I only know one person who has had Botox and she immediately came out with conjunctivitis. Plus her head looks kind of frozen.

Hasn't stopped her though, she's addicted now and keeps telling me I need it. Which is another thing I find unattractive, the fixation on appearance, even other people's. Depressingly shallow.

@sweetbellyhigh

I only know one person who has had Botox and she immediately came out with conjunctivitis. Plus her head looks kind of frozen.

Hasn't stopped her though, she's addicted now and keeps telling me I need it. Which is another thing I find unattractive, the fixation on appearance, even other people's. Depressingly shallow.

Can you see the irony in that comment

but what happens when the rest of you is ageing and it inevitably does? Jowls bit of a saggy neck etc. A weirdly smooth forehead looks a bit bizarre then!

Presumably you have more and more done. It seems to be a very slippery slope. You’ll also look markedly different to your contemporaries who haven’t used botox and fillers which is in itself a give away.

You can always tell those who haven't had fillers or botox. Those deep wrinkles and saggy skin are a dead giveaway

@Getyourarseofffthequattro

I don't think you know what irony is? This friend is fixated on appearance, her own and other people's to the point of commenting constantly on the size of strangers to giving unsolicited advice.

My observation of this is not even remotely comparable.

Not normal in my (wide) social circle at all. I hate that so many women feel they ought to do this.

@SummerBluez

You can always tell those who haven't had fillers or botox. Those deep wrinkles and saggy skin are a dead giveaway

Better to look old than weird in my opinion but each to their own. There were a couple of women clearly in their fifties who walked into a restaurant I was at lately. They had hair extensions and weirdly smooth faces. What was awful was that when they got up to go a group of young beautiful things were taking the piss. I thought it was sad and the worst thing was that they would have been attractive had they not tried so hard. Botox and fillers fool nobody.

@Clarabe1

I know plenty of older women with long hair and smooth skin. What a weird thing to laugh at. I think the issue there is with the young girls not the older women.

[quote SummerBluez]@Clarabe1

I know plenty of older women with long hair and smooth skin. What a weird thing to laugh at. I think the issue there is with the young girls not the older women.[/quote]
Fake long hair and fake pumped up smooth faces. The girls were cruel but the women were making themselves look foolish by trying to look 18 when they were pushing 60.

A small amount of Botox can look brilliant. But what looks better is really hydrated skin, so drink loads of water plus regular steam and sauna / exercise. Using one of those LED face masks. Takie evening primrose oil, eat and sleep well. Don't smoke or sunbathe and definitely lay off the wine. All the boring stuff.

I paint portraits so spend a lot of time really looking at faces. I hate doing women with fillers, because to my eye it is really obvious and looks unnatural. Like an overstuffed sofa. Seen some really bad results on women with astonishing amounts of money who have paid for "the best."

Every woman I know who has ditched wine for exercise, has also lost a decade.

@Clarabe1
How do you know how old they were out of interest?
Women are notoriously bitchy, if that's the type of girls they were they would probably have been just as scathing about wrinkles and greying hair.

I don’t know anyone who is insecure and vain enough to have resorted to Botox or fillers thank God. I thought it was just silly young reality stars or conceited actors and actresses,who are under the spotlight, who worried about their looks quite that much.

I agree OP I'm late 30s and lots of people I know are having it done. If it's been done well I really don't think you can tell. I'm hoping to put it off until I turn 40 but I suspect I'll join the club before then.

Ironically it's the 20-somethings at work who all have Botox, plumped up lips and big eyebrows, and us over 50s are left scratching our heads wondering why they do it. They all look 'done' and not in a good way.

I do wonder where it will all end. I worry that it will have terrible effects on women in years to come. I really don't see how regularly injecting Botox into your body can't cause harm. It's all safe... until it isn't. A bit like silicone breast implants. All perfectly safe until women started get sick and dying. The fact that you can't have Botox while you're pregnant says it all really.

I'll stick with my wrinkles.

@pawpaws2022 thanks so much! I use Tretinoin as well but apart from peeling haven’t noticed an improvement. Might not be using the right concentration x

You don’t have to do this. I know some women who’ve had it done and some not.

@avocadotofu

I agree OP I'm late 30s and lots of people I know are having it done. If it's been done well I really don't think you can tell. I'm hoping to put it off until I turn 40 but I suspect I'll join the club before then.

@avocadotofu - I’m 50 and my 3 close friends haven’t had Botox or fillers.

However someone of a similar age with no wrinkles and lines if I knew them I’d definitely suspect fillers and Botox.

Good skincare can go a long way, French friend of mine who lives in London uses Caudalie and she looks a bit younger than she is (early 40s) but has expression lines etc.

[quote SummerBluez]@Clarabe1
How do you know how old they were out of interest?
Women are notoriously bitchy, if that's the type of girls they were they would probably have been just as scathing about wrinkles and greying hair.[/quote]
Hands are a give away when they’re decades older than faces. Hair usually thins with age so extensions are conspicuous on older women. The age of those women must have been fairly obvious for much younger women to laugh at them. They probably wouldn’t have noticed them if they’d had wrinkles and grey hair - those things tend to confer invisibility.

@SummerBluez because despite what the deluded think a woman who is in fifties still looks like a woman in her fifties after Botox and fillers. She just looks like she has had something done. Each to their own but it really does not make you look younger. That’s just hopeful thinking. Not smoking and wearing sunscreen are the best any ageing treatments . Drinking lots of water as well and limiting alcohol.

@PinkSyCo

I don’t know anyone who is insecure and vain enough to have resorted to Botox or fillers thank God. I thought it was just silly young reality stars or conceited actors and actresses,who are under the spotlight, who worried about their looks quite that much.

Then you need to educate yourself! I'll start. I have botox and fillers. I'm the least insecure person you could wish to meet, as I actually like my looks very much and consider myself very attractive, with or without the treatments, just a bit better with them. Much the same as I look a bit better with a nice haircut so I get that done too. I'm not young, and I'm certainly not silly. I'm also neither shallow or superficial, and have sufficient experience and open mindedness to know that you can't judge a woman's character by her cosmetic choices. Oh, and I'm not an anomaly either. There are vast numbers of us having discreet procedures, because just like a new dress or haircut, we want to, and astonishingly, we are able to combine this with otherwise happy, fulfilling and worthwhile lives, and a range of other interests.

@Clarabe1
I'd venture a guess that I'm much younger than you so not really looking for anti ageing tips. But you don't know the age of those women, not really. And unless you were sat immediately next to and listening to every word the young girls said you don't know what they were laughing at. Which would be odd wouldn't it

In the past I’ve flirted with the idea of fillers in the bottom half of my face. Ironically the reason I’ve resisted is because I’m really vain. I like my face, always have and the thought of having something injected into it and hating the result has made the decision for. I’ll stick with what I’ve got.