Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Original poster

Anyone else feel that they have seen the light with regard to aesthetics and beauty ideals

168 replies

Letmetakeaselfie · 09/03/2022 12:54

Maybe not fully seen the light, but I'm getting there.

I saw a promotion for heavily discounted lip filler near me, I've never had it before and thought I would give it a try.
I got to the clinic and saw the women who worked there.. it sounds horrible to say but they all seemed to have duck lips. In any case it was various obvious that their lips were false, they were protruding from the side.
Just said I couldn't do the appointment anymore and left, I understand they weren't happy.
I suppose I just had a what am I doing moment, and I bet if I had them and liked them I'd want to keep having it, then it'd be something else.
Looking on Instagram and such, there are so many women with very full lips, heavy microbladed eyebrows, heavily contoured face and a nose ring, and overall doll-like features.
I've spent a lot of time wondering if I'd look better if I had xyz aesthetics treatment but I'm staring to see it's not worth it, has anyone else felt like this and maybe stopped having fillers and other treatments?

OP posts:

purpleboy · 09/03/2022 13:06

I honestly can't say I've ever see decent lip fillers, I know plenty of people who have them are they are so obviously fake, some even go as far as to deny they have them done.

It's quite embarrassing for them when it's so obvious, and really sad they are so insecure they feel they need to change the way they look.

I have 2 daughters so I feel it's my duty to bring then you to love the body/looks they have been given. So I have no time for this self obsessive BS. It's so damaging to young girls especially as you say they see on Instagram all these "perfect" faces and think that's how they should look, they then loose confidence that they are actually perfect as they are.

Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 09/03/2022 13:10

I’ve never felt the need for any cosmetic treatment. I’ve never even had my nails or brows done professionally.

I’m happy enough with the way I look. People spend their lives chasing a perceived beauty standard, and half the time it just makes them look strange.

Basically if you don’t like me the way I am that’s your issue not mine.

lifeuphigh · 09/03/2022 13:22

*I’ve never felt the need for any cosmetic treatment. I’ve never even had my nails or brows done professionally.

I’m happy enough with the way I look. People spend their lives chasing a perceived beauty standard, and half the time it just makes them look strange.*

Ditto. Exactly. I used to care about how that 'objective' beauty standard when I was a teenager but I met DH in Uni and perhaps that's why I stopped (that sounds awful - it's not meant to, but he has always made me feel beautiful and that must have had an impact on how I've perceived myself).

I think people with heavy make up, lip fillers etc look awful and unnatural. Similarly I like men to look 'normal' - I've never liked it when men use loads of hair product or are really really muscular (I mean gym OTT muscular, not normal healthy muscular).

HopefulProcrastinator · 09/03/2022 14:22

I remember reading an article during the first lockdown about people who were debilitatingly anxious because they couldn't access their normal 'beauty' treatments. Not just "bugger, you can see my greys" but their faces were literally different because they couldn't pump chemicals into/onto them and obliterate what they naturally looked like - they just couldn't cope with how they looked without it all.

Aside from what I think of the way these treatments make people look, can you imagine being so tied into artificial treatments that you literally cannot face the world without them? That's such a negative and destructive thing - all in the name of 'beauty'.

I'm so relieved my girls revel in their own style and aren't trying to keep up with the trends. Long may it continue and for them to derive their confidence from themselves rather than a warped idea what what they should look like definitely not being smug, it might change but definitely relieved at present

Well done on walking away from the lip fillers Letmetakeaselfie. I think you've done yourself a big favour not stepping into that trend.

mangoontoast · 09/03/2022 15:14

I'm not a big fan of the current trend for how young women/girls should look, it's not something I'd subscribe to. I'm a bit confused as to why you've included nose rings in there though?

SpanishPapers · 09/03/2022 15:16

I know people who have botox and fillers and look great. The key is I only know because they told me- if you can tell just by looking, it looks bad.

LadyCatStark · 09/03/2022 15:23

Hopefully the one good thing to come out of this cost of living crisis is that people won’t be able to afford these procedures anymore!

doadeer · 09/03/2022 15:28

It's ironic because at school I was teased for having big lips. Now everyone wants them.

I have really gone the other way, I am absolutely loving a healthy, natural look and that's my goal. I look after my skin and I want to be as natural looking as possible.

There is more of a trend for this now with "glass skin" and a huge emphasis on skincare on tiktok etc.

I think the kardashian look will start to feel dated - if you watch the videos on this look I'm amazed how many make up products are used - sometimes 15... In person this must look like stage make up?

amijustparanoidorjuststoned · 09/03/2022 15:31

@LadyCatStark

Hopefully the one good thing to come out of this cost of living crisis is that people won’t be able to afford these procedures anymore!

Yes, and will put many beauticians and aestheticians out of work in a recession. But yes, I hope it makes you happy.

TabithaTittlemouse · 09/03/2022 15:32

I don’t think I’ve seen the light because I’ve never been in to that look but it’s me that I don’t want it for, I don’t really care what others do.

allyjay · 09/03/2022 15:35

Is it me or has this look gone on forever now? When is a more natural look going to come back in?

JessieLongleg · 09/03/2022 15:38

The key to it looking good it not to use to much and unfortunately not many women just use it to iron out a few line but because they can to look a certain way. And yes over filled lips fill up over the lip line and can cause more wrinkles. Many models cover it by over lining their lips.

Bideshi · 09/03/2022 15:38

Aestheticians??? Would they be disciples of Walter Pater or Aubrey Beardsley. Honestly! the degradation of the language never fails to amaze.

No you're right, OP. It makes women who've all the bloom of youth on their side look like raddled drag queens.

Mojoj · 09/03/2022 15:39

If you notice Botox and fillers, then it's been badly done. Good for you if you're happy to let nature take its course and embrace your aging face. I don't judge either way.

Wavypurple · 09/03/2022 15:42

I had an appointment with a plastic surgeon a few weeks ago to consult about Botox/filler/something that will make me feel a bit less shit. I’m 24 and all of my friends (literally all of them) have either whole face Botox or cheek/lip filler.

On the way home honestly nearly cried because rather than trying to upsell me he basically said that I look like a completely normal human being and that until I’m older he probably wouldn’t be willing to do much and asked me to go home and really sleep on it. Made me feel so much better and was probably my saw the light moment.

FOJN · 09/03/2022 15:42

I worked in a medical aesthetics clinic for a while a few years ago. I think you need a some self restraint and a skilled practitioner for the results to look natural. The women who set the clinic up looked amazing in photographs, both in their late 50's at the time, but in real life they looked like spitting image puppets. I had a tiny bit of Botox but I never had filler because they both looked so awful. There is always the temptation to keep on tinkering, so what may look good when you start having treatments can incrementally increase to something quite unnatural after 20 years.

Wavypurple · 09/03/2022 15:43

But also just to add I don’t judge either way and I really do mean that

Beamur · 09/03/2022 15:45

I would be happy to see this trend pass. It must cost a fortune (good business for those selling though) and take ages to keep up such a high level of maintenance.
I can't say I have seen the light, as I never indulged any of these treatments. I'm pretty low maintenance!
It's curiously aging too. You sometimes see these 'influencer' types without all the makeup and grooming and they look years younger 😄
I don't think it's just a female thing either, there's certain male aesthetics that look like seriously hard work.

DetailMouse · 09/03/2022 15:46

I work with teenagers who've been excluded from school. We don't have uniform or make up rules and it makes it really hard to tell the girls apart. Honestly they all (those that do make up, there are those who don't at all too) paint on exactly the same face, along with their false eyelashes etc. I doubt I'd even recognise them if I saw them without it.

I suspect there are deep seated reasons for it though - outwardly very confident, but hiding behind a mask.

Googlecanthelpme · 09/03/2022 15:50

@allyjay

Is it me or has this look gone on forever now? When is a more natural look going to come back in?

There are many trends for natural looks right now. There’s clean make up, there’s glass skin, there’s Korean beauty, there’s Y2K - which although involves a shit ton of make up, it’s a lot less sculpted than recent years. Brow trend is now about soap brows and natural hair strokes versus the scouse brow of 5+ years ago.

For anyone interested in beauty and aesthetics, the trend has been moving away from overly filled faces for some time. Just glad a long time for the high street masses to catch up

Juno22 · 09/03/2022 15:51

Wavypurple I'm in my 50s and it must be hard nowadays to deal with the pressure when young. A 24 year old shouldn't need cosmetic procedures to look beautiful. You have the bloom of youth on your side and that is priceless and irreplaceable.

I know I sound old and boring. I'm not against beauty treatments. I've been having Botox regularly since my early 40s and have tried Profilho. Fillers aren't for me but I can understand why other women my age want them.

It's just so sad to see beautiful young women all trying to look the same.

Googlecanthelpme · 09/03/2022 15:52

Takes* a long time!

Googlecanthelpme · 09/03/2022 15:54

@Wavypurple

Well that’s a good clinic and they did what any decent Dr would do - advised you appropriately.

Look after your skin, wear SPF and delete instagram for a while

Kanaloa · 09/03/2022 15:55

@doadeer

Funny you should say that it must look like ‘stage makeup’ because I just recently online saw an influencer who got popular for doing a video where she did two tutorials, a ‘my makeup on insta’ and ‘my makeup in real life.’ So I think the thing is the influencers many people are trying to look like actually wouldn’t look like that!

But I think this is thread is talking about just one look. Actually compared to when I was young I think there’s lots of variety in fashion and makeup now. When I was young there was basically one ‘look.’ Flat, flat hair, orangey makeup, way too much lipgloss, and ballet flats. Now there is the Kardashian look but there’s also the e-girl look and the Korean glass skin style look, the dewy look, you can go grungy, oversized clothes type look, go natural etc. I definitely think there’s more than one way to look ‘cool’ nowadays.

inmyslippers · 09/03/2022 15:56

I have aesthetic work and filler to look like I don't need aesthetic work and filler. It really bewilders me that people will go to a beautician with barely a biology gcse for a cosmetic procedure. You really do get what you pay for, you shouldn't be able to tell that someone's had work done

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Swipe left for the next trending thread