Page 6 | Sex scenes in movies

187mob · 2022-03-06T17:46:27+00:00

Now I’m not a prude. I enjoy sex just as much as the next person. But I’m fed up of every other scene in a movie being a sex scene. It’s boring and often takes away from the storyline. Am I the only one who feels this way? I think it would be better if it was simply implied, rather than showing the whole scene. It’s just unnecessary and annoying. Anyone agree or am I in the minority here?

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 01:02

@fallfallfall

they are included for the men who have limited ability to think beyond the penis.

What a silly comment. Only men want to see sex scenes? 🙄 what century are we in?

SpidersAreShitheads · 07/03/2022 01:19

I would say I'm really relaxed about the subject of nudity and sex, and I don't really feel embarrassed, even if I'm sat with family.

But for me, it seems to be the case that lots of TV shows especially are written with the sole aim of getting people to watch because there's nudity. I just don't see the fascination with sex and nudity in TV shows - and they're usually included to the detriment of the plot.

For example, GOT - I never watched it, mainly because I get overly attached to characters and I heard that a lot of people you like die in it haha! But also, everyone I heard talking about it was raving about the copious and graphic sex, and I just thought it sounded boring. I don't understand the fascination with seeing willies and breasts and arses etc - there are plenty of other ways to see that kind of thing if that's what you're hankering for. I want a good plot and realistic dialogue - losing a chunk of the show each week to watch people shagging is just a bit tedious.

I love sex, I appreciate the beauty and sexiness of men and women's bodies - I just don't feel like it has to be shoe-horned into literally everything. But it's hard to make this point without people assuming that you're offended or a prude, when nothing could be further from the truth.

It's just.....boring. And overdone.

Snugglepumpkin · 07/03/2022 01:45

They are so boring they ruin films.

I used to watch a lot of films before they started doing this but now get to live a sex free movie life by just not bothering with them & doing something else.
I'd never waste money going to the cinema now in case I helped one of those films so it's saved me a fortune & broken my habit of even knowing what is newly released (unless it's made by Lego.)

Same for books.
I'll read fade to black or clean but if the author has to pad the story out with a multipage description of ridiculous OTT sex that author is on my never read again list.

At least the authors are more honest & tell you if their books are clean or steamy etc... most of the time.

MangyInseam · 07/03/2022 02:08

@EarringsandLipstick

Before that there is a real sense that refusing such roles means they won't get a beak or will not get enough work to get by.

That wasn't remotely the case in Normal People.

Their physical relationship was core to the storytelling.

It's lazy writing, you can tell the story of a relationship without graphic sex. Which was not nearly as prominent in the book btw.

MangyInseam · 07/03/2022 02:12

@Snugglepumpkin

They are so boring they ruin films.

I used to watch a lot of films before they started doing this but now get to live a sex free movie life by just not bothering with them & doing something else.
I'd never waste money going to the cinema now in case I helped one of those films so it's saved me a fortune & broken my habit of even knowing what is newly released (unless it's made by Lego.)

Same for books.
I'll read fade to black or clean but if the author has to pad the story out with a multipage description of ridiculous OTT sex that author is on my never read again list.

At least the authors are more honest & tell you if their books are clean or steamy etc... most of the time.

Books seem to go through fads. Back in the 80s and early 90s there seemed to be a rule that all novels needed at least two sex scenes and they were pretty dire overall. At some point that stopped and they became a lot less common, unless you are going specifically for graphic romance type stuff.

Though I have noticed recently there are a lot of supposedly serious books by younger women that contain a lot of graphic sex. Often biography or biography thinly disguised as fiction.

LadyPropane · 07/03/2022 02:17

I find it more in tv shows than in films.

I abandoned watching the US version of Shameless because of the endless sex scenes that were totally unnecessary. They tended to happen just as something interesting was going on and the sex scenes went on for quite a long time so it started to feel like a chore, as if we were watching an advert break. It's easy enough to just go and watch porn if you want to get your rocks off.

I think it's lazy writing. Stick in some sex scenes and a few fights or explosions and boom, there's your tv show. Yawn.

StarlightLady · 07/03/2022 05:13

I haven’t noticed a proliferation of sex scenes in the films I’ve viewed of late, but when l have seen them it is so badly done, to the point of being unrealistic.

Examples are numerous, but to cite a few, particularly in north American films, women having sex with their bras on (a regular occurrence), hardly any suggestion of the woman being offered oral, some even having sex with their knickers on (uncomfortable!), and those seemingly triangle sheets that cover a woman’s breasts but expose the man’s chest. Add to that the strangest noises (sound is added after a shoot) and instant female orgasm from 2 or so thrusts.

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 07:12

It's lazy writing, you can tell the story of a relationship without graphic sex.

I agree. But I disagree that the sex was 'graphic' in the TV series.

Sex was pretty intensely described in the book too. And in a visual medium, you don't have the accompanying narrative or inner dialogue of the characters. It therefore becomes more visual.

It's sad that because there was a lot of depiction of sex onscreen, it gets described as lazy / graphic, rather than seeing it as meaningful in the context of the plot.

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 07:15

I am surprised at so many of the views here. While there's still a lot of rubbish TV series where the sex is fairly gratuitous (hello, Netflix), so much more often it's honest, moving & enhancing a storyline.

So much less of over-made up women in lingerie never seen in real life, spouting ridiculous lines to a dominant man.

I would say the concept of female pleasure is being brought far more to the fore, overall.

ClemFandangoo · 07/03/2022 07:28

some even having sex with their knickers on (uncomfortable!)

In too many sex scenes the man doesn’t even pull his jeans down I mean, at least try and make it believable

longwayoff · 07/03/2022 08:16

Agree OP, have always assumed they are simply a Director's wankfest for him and the other guys. Watching something tedious and unnecessary with my sister the other night, she said 'why is it always the women doing all the hard work? Thrashing around naked and rubbing their fanny on a bloke just lying there'. Imagine turning up for work and getting your schedule for the day. 'Blokeman, you'll be driving a fast car and shooting people. Everywoman, get your kit off dear, you're shagging him when he's not doing the important stuff. Yes, you're on top, don't smear your make up and lots of oohs and ahs please.' Dreary, boring and a mega turn off for much of the audience.

Sparklingbrook · 07/03/2022 08:38

@longwayoff

Agree OP, have always assumed they are simply a Director's wankfest for him and the other guys. Watching something tedious and unnecessary with my sister the other night, she said 'why is it always the women doing all the hard work? Thrashing around naked and rubbing their fanny on a bloke just lying there'. Imagine turning up for work and getting your schedule for the day. 'Blokeman, you'll be driving a fast car and shooting people. Everywoman, get your kit off dear, you're shagging him when he's not doing the important stuff. Yes, you're on top, don't smear your make up and lots of oohs and ahs please.' Dreary, boring and a mega turn off for much of the audience.

I believe that's why intimacy coordinators are becoming more common. So that there's none of that, and the actors are listened to with regard to what they will and won't do when it comes to sex scenes.

Sparklingbrook · 07/03/2022 08:39

www.itaobrien.com/intimacy-on-set-guidelines.html

Loopytiles · 07/03/2022 08:40

Don’t think that’s yet the norm, sparklingbrook

Sparklingbrook · 07/03/2022 08:46

@Loopytiles

Don’t think that’s yet the norm, sparklingbrook

It's becoming more the norm @Loopytiles, because the actors that have experience with intimacy coordinators are saying they wouldn't do a job without them now.

longwayoff · 07/03/2022 09:04

By the way, America cannot look at a naked nipple. Apparently it's a highly offensive sight which sends 90% of the population into a swoon of horror. This, in the most breast-obsessed country ever. Hence the bras on during sex scenes. So, simulated sex fine - anyone seen the Pammy and Tommy film with his graphically depicted talking penis? Me neither, saw a clip on Gogglebox - but absolutely no nipples.

neverbeenskiing · 07/03/2022 09:29

I'm surprised by the comments about This Is Going to Hurt. I've just finished watching it and I can only remember one sex scene. It wasn't graphic at all and was quite short. I certainly don't agree it was "unecessary". In that scene Adam's partner is asking him about work and he clearly initiates sex as a distraction because he can't bring himself talk about the traumatic event he's experienced. But then even while they're having sex we see him experiencing flashbacks, so it's like he can't escape it and it shows how his job, and the trauma that goes with it, is invading every aspect of his life.

I'm pretty relaxed about sex and nudity but what does annoy me is all the women having mind-blowing orgasms after a few seconds of PIV sex and zero foreplay. Bridgerton was awful for this. No wonder so many men are clueless!

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 09:34

@longwayoff

By the way, America cannot look at a naked nipple. Apparently it's a highly offensive sight which sends 90% of the population into a swoon of horror. This, in the most breast-obsessed country ever. Hence the bras on during sex scenes. So, simulated sex fine - anyone seen the Pammy and Tommy film with his graphically depicted talking penis? Me neither, saw a clip on Gogglebox - but absolutely no nipples.

Well, it's not universal. The series Working Moms (which has its own share of unrealistic sex scenes), has lots of nipples on show!

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 09:39

I agree @Sparklingbrook

The interviews with the amazing Lenny Abrahamson, director of Normal People, were really interesting in terms of how they worked with Ita O'Brien.

He was anxious initially thinking it would compromise his relationship with the actors but found it transformational.

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/books/2020/apr/25/normal-people-intimacy-coordinator-works-sally-rooney-sex-scenes

EarringsandLipstick · 07/03/2022 09:42

@longwayoff

Agree OP, have always assumed they are simply a Director's wankfest for him and the other guys. Watching something tedious and unnecessary with my sister the other night, she said 'why is it always the women doing all the hard work? Thrashing around naked and rubbing their fanny on a bloke just lying there'. Imagine turning up for work and getting your schedule for the day. 'Blokeman, you'll be driving a fast car and shooting people. Everywoman, get your kit off dear, you're shagging him when he's not doing the important stuff. Yes, you're on top, don't smear your make up and lots of oohs and ahs please.' Dreary, boring and a mega turn off for much of the audience.

That's so reductive. I'm not sure what you've watched but I've seen plenty of mainstream as well as more art house productions that don't depict sex in that way.

I mean, there's lots of shit TV & movies that do fit that depiction. In the same way, there's lots of movies etc with stupid, unrealistic storylines, settings & characterisation.

But I've watched plenty of programmes that depict sex in an appropriate context.

longwayoff · 07/03/2022 09:51

Well, yes, but I'm referring to the ones that do depict sex in unnecessary and unrealistic scenes, often out of context with the storyline, not to the ones that don't. Sorry if you misunderstood.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 07/03/2022 09:58

It really depends if it’s integral to the plot. Quite often it isn’t. If it doesn’t illustrate an important point about a character, show a meaningful development in the relationship between characters or move the plot then in my view it’s gratuitous.

Londoncallingtothefarawaytowns · 07/03/2022 09:59

@longwayoff haha thrashing about

There’s a scene at the very end of the very last episode of SATC where Samantha gets her mojo back and is having sex with Smith, and it’s always confused me as to what she was actually doing ? She’s flapping around under Smith and any time I watch it, years later I still think “ what on Earth enjoyment is supposed to be getting out of that ?”

Agrudge · 07/03/2022 10:13

Not sure what your watching but most films dont have sex scenes these days . I go to the cinema alot.

80's and 90's films random boobs every where

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 07/03/2022 10:48

And it's actors. For both sexes. Not actresses.

Plenty of female actors actively prefer to be referred to as actresses - that's how they identify. I don't know about the preferences of any of the woman discussed on here, but declaring wholesale that everybody in the profession must be called actors is a bit like insisting that all women must be Ms, and that those who choose to be known as Miss or Mrs are 'wrong' to want to identify that way.