Page 5 | Children told about war in Russia in school

ShepherdMoons · 2022-02-28T17:49:21+00:00

Dd is a sensitive soul in year 3 and today their class was told that people in Ukraine are having to leave their country with their pets for fear of being shot by Russians (this is the gist of what dd says). We haven't spoken about this at home. AIBU to think the school shouldn't be talking to such young children about this?

AnotherForumUser · 28/02/2022 18:59

YABVU

LolaButt · 28/02/2022 19:00

The reason you speak to your children about these things is to assist them in not becoming ignorant adults for one.

For example, if a refugee child started in her class would you prefer your child to have some sort of understanding as to why the child who may not speak English has suddenly appeared?

Ah honestly. This is half the problem these days. They’re so sheltered from the reality of life a lot of them end up really ignorant and entitled adults.

IBelieveInAThingCalledScience · 28/02/2022 19:00

@MyDcAreMarvel

Absolutely not, 7 and 8 year olds should not be exposed to adult worries. If they are personally living through it then they sadly will be but to tell young children is abusive .

What an extraordinarily silly thing to say.

It's not abusive to help your children make sense of the world.

It's irresponsible to let them hear things first hand from their peers with no proper context.

They don't live in a bubble.

Averyproperteaparty · 28/02/2022 19:00

It absolutely should be spoken about in school, especially at that age. Year three is age appropriate to be having these discussions in simple format.

Bostonbullsmumma · 28/02/2022 19:01

My reception age DC (who is the youngest in the class) come out talking about it today. I'm very open with my children and don't believe it was inappropriate for him to hear it. I'm sure other parents might not agree tomorrow at the school gates!!

WonderfulYou · 28/02/2022 19:01

One of the first things I did this morning was sit my class down and explain it all and answer questions - I was honest but left a lot of things out.

It was all they were talking about and I heard one of them saying were going to get bombed and then that person told someone else were going to all die soon because of bombs and I knew I had to nip it in the bud.

The real news and what’s going on is awful but what’s worse is there is fake news and old/fake videos going around making people believe it’s even worse especially for us in the UK.

Waltzingdaydreams · 28/02/2022 19:01

Children hear everything. It is good someone is explaining to the children. I remember being a child when the gulf war was announced. We lived near an army base and had a few military families at the school. My friends and I were in the playground very aware of the things the adults were talking about and scared that we were going to be evacuated. We had only recently learnt about WW2. I don't remember anyone ever explaining to us. Although I do remember the class writing christmas letters to the soldiers at one point so I guess they did speak to us at some point.

Emiliaswrath · 28/02/2022 19:01

My 15yr old came home today saying the kids at school were saying that Putin was going to nuke the UK because Boris called him dense

Mydogmylife · 28/02/2022 19:02

@MyDcAreMarvel

Absolutely not, 7 and 8 year olds should not be exposed to adult worries. If they are personally living through it then they sadly will be but to tell young children is abusive .

Nonsense - they will hear about it anyway so you might as well try and control it into an age appropriate narrative

HelloBunny · 28/02/2022 19:02

I remember all of the big news stories from my childhood. They’re a part of my life story.

RoseRedRoseBlue · 28/02/2022 19:02

@MyDcAreMarvel - for goodness sake, pack it in. It’s real and it’s happening. It’s not remotely abusive to inform children about the world around them.

Inthesameboatatmo · 28/02/2022 19:06

I'm having open discussions with all of my children. Youngest is 8 oldest is 14. Of course they need to know about .YABU.

maddiemookins16mum · 28/02/2022 19:09

YABU, you’re not helping your wain by hiding things, in fact you can make it worse.

alfagirl73 · 28/02/2022 19:11

I think it is important that kids are told about it in an age appropriate way and are able to ask questions.

I was at school in the 70's and 80's and there were a lot of tensions in the world then. Kids at school obviously picked up some bits from the news - which I didn't watch - and I remember one day some kid put it round the class that there was a bomb in the school that was going to go off that afternoon.

I went home for lunch and was walking home with an older girl from school who, during the walk home, explained to me in detail what would happen with this bomb... except she clearly thought all bombs were nukes because she essentially described the fall out from a nuclear bomb - and basically informed me that if I didn't die in the blast, I would die from the radiation afterwards anyway - as would everyone in the area. Bear in mind I was about 6/7 years old at this point and it didn't exactly occur to me that if it was common knowledge that a bomb (of any kind) was actually scheduled to go off in a school that afternoon, all hell would've broken loose and we wouldn't be casually strolling home for lunch!

By the time I got home for lunch, I was consumed with fear. My mum wasn't the type to call the school about things - she was very much the "don't be so silly - get to school!" type. However, when it came to going back to school after lunch I was literally hysterical - crying and asking my mum why she was sending me to school to die! My mum called the head at the school absolutely fuming that some kid was telling everyone they were going to get blown up! Of course it had just been a rumour spread by a couple of kids - but it was only after I'd had proper reassurance from the head teacher and my parents - that I calmed down.

The point is, if you and/or the school don't explain this stuff, kids will come out with all kinds and your child could be sitting there terrified based on some random comment from another kid. While the reality of the situation is very unnerving and scary, it is better for kids to have things explained properly and for them to be given reassurances rather than leave them to their own imaginations, likely fuelled by other kids talking.

sillysmiles · 28/02/2022 19:11

You are doing your child a disservice by not having any current affairs/news on the TV in the home.

Growing up in the 80s/90s in Rep of Ire, we always watched the news- which routinely -almost nightly-showed news of sectarian violence in Northern Ireland.

It is important for everyone to understand what is going on in the world - hiding the news from children isn't protecting them.

C152 · 28/02/2022 19:12

There was a similar thread recently and, like that one, I think that YABU.

NeedAHoliday2021 · 28/02/2022 19:13

All the dc will be talking about it so you let your dc go into school with no knowledge?! That’s a mistake imo. I briefed my dc and let them know there’s likely to be a lot of muddled news they might hear so come and chat to me about it. I also said we want to help so will see how things go but will research the best way we can help.

I was Year 3-4 when the Iraq war broke out and remember it now. We had a soldier come to school and it was amazingly interesting although the boys were mostly concerned about where they pooped in the desert.

NeedAHoliday2021 · 28/02/2022 19:15

You dc needs to know they can trust you to be their truth and rock even even things seem scary. Ignoring it is not helping a sensitive soul.

HermioneAndRoger · 28/02/2022 19:15

I am genuinely alarmed by the number of MNers who clearly cannot cope with the current situation and are living with a seriously disruptive level of anxiety. Absolutely anything which helps children to access calm, dispassionate information and avoid this for their own adulthood is, to me, worth having.

Original poster

ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 19:16

I will speak to her tonight and try to explain in an age appropriate way but . . . why does my 8 year old need me to have the news on at home? (thinking of what another poster said)

Sorry, someone else mentioned going to school in the 70s and 80s and knowing about current affairs. I suppose I was 'sheltered' from it and none of my friends knew anything either. We had great childhoods and as adults we are well educated and not pig ignorant as some posters have suggested!!

OP posts:

GrendelsGrandma · 28/02/2022 19:16

yabu.

You couldn't not tell them for that long anyway, we may well see disruption with oil prices etc, your DC will see the real life impact and need to understand what it's about, the same as covid.

I'm not sure there is any topic you can't tell kids about, in an age appropriate way.

Mocara · 28/02/2022 19:16

@ExactlyThis

I disagree with the majority and YANBU.

Two of war has scared a lot of adults and personally i think children should be sheltered from things like this.

We don’t have the news on at home and I wouldn’t be impressed with my children being told about this without parents being forewarned. This shouldn’t be a school decision.

Its not a school desicion what a stupid thing to say. You think the news is the only way they might hear about the war ?? and it"ll be schools fault if they hear anything ?? No other child in the school will have a conversation about this on the playground ? When any child asks a question about the war theyll be told to be quite because your childs being sheltered ? No children at your childs school that are being directly affected by this war then ?? Apart from that what they may hear outside of school . Ignorance breeds fear, why would you not want to support your child to understand at an age appropriate level is beyond me . If for no other reason than they may be able to comfort a friend.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 28/02/2022 19:17

That’s like saying ‘eat your dinner, there are starving children in Africa’.

It really isn't.

It is horrific for those children and seeing and hearing what’s going on for those poor little babies breaks my heart, but children can’t comprehend any of that.

Well, they can comprehend it, but many parents don't seem to want them to comprehend it. Two different things.

We are adults for a lot longer than we are children. Let children be children whilst they can be. The magic is gone by the time they’re 10 in the majority of cases.

Learning about war doesn't stop you being a child. Hiding children from the realities of the world doesn't do them any favours in the long run. You don't have to tell them everything, but they should be able to learn about what's happening in an age-appropriate way.

GrendelsGrandma · 28/02/2022 19:20

@HermioneAndRoger

I am genuinely alarmed by the number of MNers who clearly cannot cope with the current situation and are living with a seriously disruptive level of anxiety. Absolutely anything which helps children to access calm, dispassionate information and avoid this for their own adulthood is, to me, worth having.

I mean, there's an apparently irrational brutal dictator who is issuing veiled threats to use nuclear weapons. Or at the very least thermobaric weapons that rupture people's lungs. I think I'm going to have a disruptive level of anxiety about that, call me a wet willy all you like

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 28/02/2022 19:20

why does my 8 year old need me to have the news on at home? (thinking of what another poster said)

Because it's better that she hears about what's going on while you're around to discuss it with, rather than hearing exaggerated versions from her peers.

Newsround (and similar shows) exist for good reason - so children can learn about the world in an age-appropriate way.