Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

To of used my clients loo?

287 replies

Cleaninglady47 · 19/02/2022 12:42

Name changed because this is probably quite outing and I don’t want it linked to my previous posts!
So I’m a cleaner, yesterday I was at a new-ish clients house, she’s got a big home so she’s booked me for 3 hours each time, just before I cleaned her bathrooms I said “oh do you mind if I quickly use your loo before I clean” and she said “hmmm this once but don’t make a habit of it, it’s not very professional”. I did go, because I was desperate but I feel mortified, upset and embarrassed. It’s never even occurred to me that this would be considered unprofessional?! The lady who does my hair, and the one who does my nails comes to my house and they use my loo and I’ve never given it a second thought?!
I ALWAYS use the toilet before I leave my house in the mornings to try and avoid needing to go at clients homes but sometimes I can do 2 cleans before I have my lunch break (4-5 hours plus travel time) and if I’m drinking water to keep my hydrated it’s inevitable I will need the toilet at some point. I know I’m a grown adult and I should of held it and should be able to control my bladder (which I can) but I was desperate and holding it would of made me uncomfortable. Am I being unreasonable?! I’m not sure, does anyone have any tips to avoid a situation like this in the future?

YABU - of course you shouldn’t use your clients toilets!
YANBU - you can’t help needing the loo and should be able to go at a clients house if you really need

OP posts:
JuliaSways · 19/02/2022 13:46

3 red flags for me with a new cleaning client that usually indicate (not always but usually) that they're a problem client. Learned from many years experience and having never received a complaint about my work other than from the red flag givers.

  1. do they offer you a drink? If not, why not? If they're not in, have they told you to help yourself to tea and coffee? Cleaning is a hard job and you need to stay hydrated. I very rarely accept because a coffee makes me chill out and I'd rather just crack on (I have a big water bottle with me). But the fact they offer shows that they aren't just viewing me as a servent and are concerned for my comfort whilst cleaning.

  2. loo rules - I'm fit to clean your toilet but not use it? No thanks, clean your own toilet from now on and I'll find a new, respectful client.

  3. The toilets that aren't cleaned to some degree prior to me arriving usually end up being problem clients, it's a lack of respect IMO to leave skid marks or worse for me to deal with. It takes seconds to either chuck a bit of bleach down before I arrive.

Every problem client I have had has ticked at least one of the above points. We're not your servant, we are not beneath you - we are doing a job you don't want to (or can't). We deserve some respect.

I've got a lovely set of clients, adore each and every one of them and I am happy to go the extra mile for them because they don't expect it and treat me as an equal.

haismfh · 19/02/2022 13:48

Good for you. Send that message. It's absolutely ridiculous.

Who wants to work for someone like that. A decent person would have just said here's where you can put your coat, feel free to use the loo whenever you need to and you're also welcome to get a glass of water. Or similar.

What is wrong with people? You are good enough to clean up her pissy, shitty loo but you're not good enough to piss in it? Fuck that!
Obviously you'd clean the loo after using it so what the fuck difference does it make to her!

FuckThatBullshit · 19/02/2022 13:48

Good for you OP. Hope you farted on her pillowcase! Stuck up bitch.

Reviewer123456 · 19/02/2022 13:49

Your message to her is perfect.

What an awful woman, no one ever has the right to make you feel like that.

Well done on giving her the boot xx

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2022 13:49

I’ve heard everything now. These twats. We make ours coffee and give her biscuits. If she bothered asking before she used the loo I’d think she’d gone mad.

Honeyroar · 19/02/2022 13:49

Well done that was a good message. If she doesn’t owe you anything I’d be tempted to block her - so she doesn’t get the satisfaction of sending a snotty reply. And beware of her doing a bad review on social media.

Jvg33 · 19/02/2022 13:49

She's snotty. What does she expect people to do when they are at work? Not need to go for hours at a time? Cut this contract loose

Legoninjago1 · 19/02/2022 13:49

Yanbu. Can't believe people like that actually exist.

Merryoldgoat · 19/02/2022 13:49

Well done OP - great that you are able to stand up for yourself.

Pipsquiggle · 19/02/2022 13:50

What an awful woman. Good response - tweak it slightly as suggested above @sadpapercourtesan.

Good cleaners are very hard to come by and it's important you know your own worth. Just expect she might slag you off to other people so do you depend on her network?

doadeer · 19/02/2022 13:50

I think that is unbelievably rude of her. I would have been mortified too ☹️

SpeckledlyHen · 19/02/2022 13:50

I really do not understand why people treat employee's in their homes so differently from their friends. I am guessing if she had a dinner party and a visitor needed to use the loo there wouldn't be an issue. Totally batshit, insane, snotty and snobby behaviour. I could not A: treat someone like that and B: work for someone like that.

I would email or text and say you can't do her cleaning anymore. Something along the lines of:

Dear XXXX,

I am just writing to let you know that I am unable to clean your house again. The sole reason being is that I cannot guarantee whether or not I will need to use the toilet in your house for the duration of the hours I am working. As this is deemed unacceptable by you, as a direct consequence I am unable to continue. I hope you manage to find someone with a more robust bladder than mine.

XXXXX

girlmom21 · 19/02/2022 13:51

@Puzzledandpissedoff

"I won't be cleaning for you again as following your rather baffling reaction to my asking to use your loo I realize we have different expectations of the working relationship"

Perfect

I like this.
youarenottheone · 19/02/2022 13:52

She was horrible to you. It's good that you are in a position to turn her down.

ItsDisneyBitch · 19/02/2022 13:52

Of course she is completely unreasonable and horrible glad you are jagging her in.

Although I must say on mumsnet there are a vast amount of posters who think it’s unreasonable for god forbid the workman to use their facilities. So I’m not sure where they have all gone.

My husband is an electrician, he is never asked if he wants a drink or told that he can use the facilities.

twinkie100 · 19/02/2022 13:52

I'm quite sure it's a legal requirement to have access to a bathroom at your place of work. This woman is batshit. You did nothing wrong. What a horrible woman

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 19/02/2022 13:54

That's ridiculous, why would anyone refuse bathroom breaks? Sounds like a power trip and she just likes being mean.

Aside from being utterly rude and nasty, refusing you use of her toilet is really stupid on her part.

Has she stopped to wonder why supermarkets offer customer toilets? If you have somebody on your premises, whose presence benefits you - whether gathering goods to buy from you or providing a service to you - the first thing you want to do to keep them there and focused on the task is to make sure that they aren't being distracted by needing the toilet and desperate to get away to find one ASAP.

Anybody - especially a 'professional' - with half a brain will understand that, if you let somebody spend 2 minutes using your toilet, they will then be far more productive and able to concentrate properly, without rushing, on what you want them to do.

She's an idiot, and a nasty one too. That's a great message - both kind and sincere but also likely to give her pause for thought about what a tool she's been, and how she's now only inconvenienced herself. If she's as grandiose and self-important as that, she'll be mortified by being 'sacked' because of her poor behaviour by a 'lowly' cleaner - haha!!

NatashaBedwouldbenice · 19/02/2022 13:55

I would consider sending this, I won't be cleaning for you again as following your rather baffling reaction to my asking to use your loo I realize we have different expectations of the working relationship but I'd sleep on it first.

Mellowyellow222 · 19/02/2022 13:55

She is bonkers.

I go to the loo at work - most people do. It’s not unprofessional😂😂

doadeer · 19/02/2022 13:56

Glad you've ditched her. 👏

BurntO · 19/02/2022 13:58

Don’t even ask next time 🙈 especially if you’re immediately cleaning it! YANBU

Juno22 · 19/02/2022 13:59

I'd be embarrassed if my cleaner felt she had to ask. Well done for dumping her.

Boiledbeetle · 19/02/2022 13:59

@Cleaninglady47

Oh you poor love.

I cannot even imagine being peed (!!) off about my cleaner using the toilet that she is about to clean!

I can imagine the look on her face if I tried to stop her!

Mine has me trained to feed her bacon butties and cups of tea whilst she works though.

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 19/02/2022 14:01

Drop the customer ASAP and tell her exactly why. Good domestic cleaners are like hen's teeth so I'm certain you'll have no problem replacing the hours. If you know any other local cleaners it might be worth giving them a heads up about her, too; no-one deserves to be treated like this in their place of work!

GreyGoose1980 · 19/02/2022 14:01

I appreciate most self employed people need all their clients right now but if you ever find yourself with too much business make sure she’s the first one you let go of! Totally unacceptable of her!