To ask why some people are SO rude about Valentine’s Day?

[Sweetlikejollof]

I find this so strange. If you don’t celebrate it, then that’s fine. Nobody is trying to make you.

However, some of us do celebrate it. And we enjoy it. So, why be rude about it? Why all the vitriol? Every year, multiple threads of people being remarkably unpleasant that others have the effrontery to celebrate something that they don’t personally care for. Why?!

And the ‘it’s commercial nonsense’ and ‘we celebrate our love every day’ arguments aren’t relevant here, as I’m not asking why you don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day (your relationship is entirely your business), I’m specifically asking why some people are rude about other people celebrating it.

@amiafreakofnature

So a man can't spoil his woman

His denotes ownership - obviously

So you can’t say, for example, ‘my boyfriend’ It has to be ‘Denis, with whom I cohabit and have consensual exclusive sexual activity with in a mutual monogamous agreement’?

I don't like valentines day (or the multiple 'anniversarys' people seem to celebrate without even being married) because I think it is an excuse for big companies to make money and actually ends up causing more upset because generally their will always be one partner who cares more than the other and they end up being upset over something that is really insignificant in a relationship. However - I understand that a lot of people do enjoy it and want to celebrate and that's fine. People are also very rude about Samhain (Halloween) which for me is a very important holiday and I do celebrate it. I think sometimes you just have to ignore the rude opinions.

@Saysama I haven't even said I objected to Valentine's Day! I object to OP acting all burly about people saying they do object! Keep up 😂
But again if you can only resort to searching my posts and slating my relationship to attempt to try and prove a point - if that makes you feel a tiny bit better then carry on

One thing that MN has taught me is that whatever you do you will always be judged.

It's made me very careful to only share details about my life with people I really trust.

[quote Sweetlikejollof]@formalineadeline I haven’t stated that it’s rude for people to discuss something they dislike or that threads about how wonderful VD is are more valid than those that dislike it. Nor have I taken anything as a personal criticism.

My OP is neither long, nor complicated. As you clearly misunderstood it the first time, perhaps read it again.[/quote]
You're actually being quite rude yourself now...

[quote Sweetlikejollof]@WhatAHexIGotInto They are. And, by the same token, you could have just ignored my post.[/quote]
Good lord, it's so telling that posters who claim to be so 'calm' etc like to engage with even the most innocuous comments.

The whole Valentine's thing clearly bothers you very much or you wouldn't have posted in the first place, inviting replies, then getting pissy with those you don't like. You should try to unclench a little, it's not important.

@Hadjab People who don’t read the post asking about things I haven’t said are expecting what response, exactly? If you consider my reaction to that to be rude, then you’re entitled to your opinion. I disagree.

@WhatAHexIGotInto Indeed, saying ‘you could have ignored this post’ clearly indicates that I’m furious. Oddly enough, you don’t seem to think you saying the exact same thing to me indicates that you need to unclench. Funny that.

Again, you are free to follow your own advice and ignore the post. It’s not important.

So you can’t say, for example, ‘my boyfriend’
It has to be ‘Denis, with whom I cohabit and have consensual exclusive sexual activity with in a mutual monogamous agreement’?

@Cheekypeach Your comments are gold! 😂

[quote HelloFrostyMorning]@Silverswirl You care WAY too much about other peoples lives dear. Just like the mood hoovers and fun sponges on here.[/quote]
mood hoovers and fun sponges

Unpleasant.

@Satingreenshutters

This is why...year after year after year of utter fucking drival.

He forgot and I am devastated.
He said we were not doing it this year and I bought him a car and he didn't even make me a sambo.
He bought me petrol station flowers..the Gobshite.
He spent €200 quid on Blood Red Roses and we have no money for food..the gobshite.
His Valentine's Card said "friend".
He didn't cut my toast into love hearts.
I put on Valentines lingerie and he locked himself in the bathroom for a wank.
He bought me Quality Street and I only Like Lindor.
I feel so unloved/unappreciated/undervalued/taken for granted.
My friend Pauline got a trip to the Bahamas and my BF only got me the Meal Deal from Tesco.
Valley's Day is so important to me and he doesn't care, it is so hurtful.
The kids made cards but Hubby left me nothing this morning except toast crumbs on the counter, I am so gutted and hurt.

Blah
Blah
Blah

This. Which is repeated on Mother’s Day the following month. And Christmas too

This thread is amazing. Unexpectedly funny.

It started off well when the op's point was proven very well in the first few posts by some people who waded in being incredibly antagonistic and didn't like it when she didn't back down

It's ok not to like valentine's Day. But it's really unnecessary to be so scathing of people that do like it.

I’m not sure why you give a shit op , Valentine’s Day IS commercial holiday and it’s not for people to treat their children and expect something of their dh . I agree with others the dh who treats them like shit are the ones who will do Valentine’s Day so people can be all in denial that well we must be happy because he bought me a bunch of flowers on Valentine’s Day let’s forget the other 364 days he treats you like shit . It’s a load of rubbish op that’s why people call it but whatever you carry on .

Love that people think I was saying I hate Valentine’s Day 😂

It doesn't have to be a mad commercial holiday. I've been married for 15 years and we've fell into a valentines routine of me preparing DH his favourite meal and he buys me something for a hobby I do. No tat. We have a couple of drinks together in the evening and that's it. It's nice.

We don't celebrate because our relationship is shit the rest of the year as some are suggesting! I think it's responses like that the OP was talking about

@gettingolderandgrumpy

I’m not sure why you give a shit op , Valentine’s Day IS commercial holiday and it’s not for people to treat their children and expect something of their dh . I agree with others the dh who treats them like shit are the ones who will do Valentine’s Day so people can be all in denial that well we must be happy because he bought me a bunch of flowers on Valentine’s Day let’s forget the other 364 days he treats you like shit . It’s a load of rubbish op that’s why people call it but whatever you carry on .

Why do you give a shit about me giving a shit?

The fact that Valentine’s Day is celebrated by people in all kinds of relationships, ranging from the toxic to the fabulous, has already been gone into on this thread.

My OP explicitly states that I’m not asking why you don’t like or celebrate Valentine’s Day (your relationship is entirely your business), I’m specifically asking why some people are rude about other people celebrating it. But, you carry on.

@Alittlepotofrosie

This thread is amazing. Unexpectedly funny.

It started off well when the op's point was proven very well in the first few posts by some people who waded in being incredibly antagonistic and didn't like it when she didn't back down

It's ok not to like valentine's Day. But it's really unnecessary to be so scathing of people that do like it.

Not cowering in the face of their aggression apparently means I’m ‘incredibly angry’. It’s pretty great.

There are some genuinely hilarious comments involving stuffed hedgehogs, if you keep going.

I’m totally ambivalent about V day, we don’t really “celebrate” other than a card, bottle of wine and a shag, but I would never wade onto a thread where someone is disappointed in their V day by pissing all over their chips even more and belittling them for caring about it.

Some people care about these things more than others - doesn’t make them better or worse people, just different strokes for different folks.

What’s the point of pointing out your disdain and pity of “poor fools who are taken away by such commercialism” other than showing yourself for the massive twat you are?!

@Popcornriver Yes, pretty much. According to several posters, you can’t be in a loving respectful relationship and also celebrate Valentine’s Day. See also, birthdays and anniversaries.

It’s such an odd perspective.

[quote Sweetlikejollof]@WhatAHexIGotInto Indeed, saying ‘you could have ignored this post’ clearly indicates that I’m furious. Oddly enough, you don’t seem to think you saying the exact same thing to me indicates that you need to unclench. Funny that.

Again, you are free to follow your own advice and ignore the post. It’s not important.[/quote]
Well it clearly is to you - you just keep a-comin' back.

Aaaand in 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...

@WhatAHexIGotInto I’m not ‘coming back’, I’m here. It’s my thread, so it’s of interest to me. I’ve never claimed otherwise. That’s why I started it.

Why are you here? Why are you having so much difficulty following your own advice and ignoring the post? And why is it ‘innocuous’ when you say it, but ‘pissy’ when I do? The hypocrisy is hilarious.

It’s a bit like having a conversation with a bowl of mince, so I think I actually am done with you, now. Enjoy yourself and free to move on when you’re done.

*Well it clearly is to you - you just keep a-comin' back. gringringrin

Aaaand in 3 ... 2 ... 1 ...*

This is the thread that just keeps giving

It's her thread!!

I don't get it

It's rude for someone to say they believe Valentine's Day is commercial and they choose not to celebrate it.. and that is taken personally?

Should those who don't celebrate it take it personally that others are discussing that they do

For what it's worth I don't think anyone is a mug for celebrating it, nor am I offended by it, if you're happy and it works in your relationship, good. If it means that you end up with unrealistic expectations and it is superficial rather than a show of love, that is a shame, but I believe that of most celecrations

I would like to hope that if someone posted 'what did you get for valentines' and I replied nothing and the reasons why, that it wouldn't be deemed rude, simply me giving our reasons, as others can say what they got and I won't take offence

Chocs and cards and all other tat is half price today

What a waste!

It always makes me laugh on these threads where an OP says 'why are people so rude and unpleasant' then proceeds to be just as rude and unpleasant themselves.
Cop on to yourself for fuck sake.