What is your biggest regret in life?

[Teadrinker11]

At 26, I know I'm still at an age where I'm somewhat young enough to make good decisions to prevent more regret in the future, but I still do regret a lot. I've wasted so much money on things I didn't need, I neglected my health for so long, it's taken me to 26 to somewhat have my life together. I'm studying law and love it, but hate how I spent so much time after school messing around wasting my life. I didn't go to college straight after school like so many of my classmates did and I still pine over the years I lost, when people in their early 20s are having the time of their lives. What is your biggest regret?

My biggest regret is being impatient, not biding my time, when I was younger. I often felt so desperate to do something 'now' to get out of a situation and, hopefully, improve my life, I made a couple of rash decisions which I deeply regret. If I'd been prepared to wait a bit longer, things would have resolved themselves. However I don't live in the past and it was all a long time ago; it just comes back to me sometimes.

Not having further scans and tests before having a termination for medical reasons. He may have been ok, a mild case, and he could have still had a good life. But I will never know now. I just panicked when I heard the diagnosis and opted for abortion. I should have asked lots of questions, but I didn't. I just wanted it over and done with, I wanted to stop being pregnant. I can not forgive myself and have to believe that it was as bad as I first thought, in order to live with myself.

If I could go back to my 16 year old self and could give her 1 piece of advice it would be wait till with the man you want to marry and think will make a great dad (and preferably married) to have kids. I’ve got amazing children so grateful for and my absolute biggest non regret is not going for a termination when in the most desolate place due to an unplanned pregnancy, for that I was given the easiest most amazing child. However if I could of given my children the things I ended up having no control over by a bit more forethought then that’s one thing I would change. Money, career etc, yes could of done things better, wiser, obviously bought earlier! However all that is nothing really, just added life experience and probably lucked out on as many of the decisions I made as ended up regretting

I always try to live by the mantra...'don't look back you're not going that way.'

P.s. re: my older children, just wish they’d had what my younger children have (not necessarily materially)

Not leaving my ex husband sooner and developing an 8 year cocaine habit due to past trauma.

@formalineadeline

Still being alive.

I hope your ok ? X

Although I'm often sad at how much I missed out on as a child and young adult, and how I'm not really where I'd like to be in life ideally, I can't say I would actually go back and change anything. I love the life I have now, I just wish I'd figured a lot of stuff out earlier .

I lost 10 stones, promised I’d never put it back on then did. I’m an idiot. It’s my biggest (sarcastic laugh) regret.

Marrying my XHs. Had doubts at the time and should have had more self—respect.

I regret not discovering MN earlier- I have learned so much here that would have been useful when I was younger (stuff like standing up for oneself, dealing with conflict, how to build relationships at work, knowing when to end relationships or when to quit a job, and most importantly: having boundaries)

@DavesSpareDeckChair

I regret not discovering MN earlier- I have learned so much here that would have been useful when I was younger (stuff like standing up for oneself, dealing with conflict, how to build relationships at work, knowing when to end relationships or when to quit a job, and most importantly: having boundaries)

This is very true. And I agree 100%. However I sometimes wonder if it hasn't made me too much of a ballbreaker

Not reporting the abuse I was experiencing at home as a child.

Not having a better relationship with my DF, which is not something I could have helped, but it still hurts.

He was a drinker and this caused lots of misery for us as we grew up.

As I got older our relationship was strained, I didn’t respect him because of the things which had happened during our life. My DM left him and it was only when I returned home from a holiday that I realised this had happened. I was early 20’s and I still remember the awful sinking feeling when I returned home. I was left with my DF whose drinking escalated.

After a troubling time, I eventually moved out and that’s when our relationship took a turn for the better. I understood him more, realised that the pattern of drinking stemmed from his own upbringing.

Sadly my DF died within a year of me moving out. A year where we’d built bridges but still had some way to go in healing our relationship. We just needed some space between us but it just wasn’t long enough.

I think of him often and the older I’ve got the more I understand him.

@DavesSpareDeckChair

I regret not discovering MN earlier- I have learned so much here that would have been useful when I was younger (stuff like standing up for oneself, dealing with conflict, how to build relationships at work, knowing when to end relationships or when to quit a job, and most importantly: having boundaries)

Yes. I would have found it immensely helpful during the difficult teenage years and earlier. I only found it by accident .

I'm 44. I left a great teaching job as I was fed up with teaching. I could afford to leave so I did. 3 months later corona fucking virus. Massive drop in family income and I went back to teaching. Have been on maternity covers ever since waiting till leave. Now realise I can't leave any time soon and the job I had was far far easier than any teaching role I've had since. And now applying for jobs so I can start at yet another school and spend another year establishing myself.

TL,DR
I regret resigning from my job which in hindsight was a great gig 🙄

@robocracker

I'm 44. I left a great teaching job as I was fed up with teaching. I could afford to leave so I did. 3 months later corona fucking virus. Massive drop in family income and I went back to teaching. Have been on maternity covers ever since waiting till leave. Now realise I can't leave any time soon and the job I had was far far easier than any teaching role I've had since. And now applying for jobs so I can start at yet another school and spend another year establishing myself.

TL,DR
I regret resigning from my job which in hindsight was a great gig 🙄

Oh and no point quitting and doing something else as I'm too well paid. I earn £17,000 working 2 days a week. Even that's too bloody often!

Being a people pleaser for thirty odd years. Life is sooooooo much better now I don't do it.

@TheMarvelousMrsMaisel

Being a people pleaser for thirty odd years. Life is sooooooo much better now I don't do it.

@TheMarvelousMrsMaisel How did you stop ? I also have this problem. Im fed up of doing things and going along with plans for the sake of others.

The thing I most regret is not working out that my dd ex husband was an addictive gambler he hid the fact so well.

I regret the fact I liked him!

Meeting the cunt that's killed me

Are you speaking to us from beyond the grave?

@marthasGinyard
Sounds serious 😮 hope your ok

@AnastasiaRomanov

Are you speaking to us from beyond the grave?

Well, you clearly are

Being a people pleaser for so long. Things are much better now, though