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Original poster

When people visit your house do they take their shoes offf

476 replies

PlantMummy87 · 09/02/2022 18:19

Do you request people to take their shoes off when they come into your house?

I always take off my shoes whenever I enter someone's home as think it is rude not to as I think on the whole people like to keep their floors and carpets clean. However my FIL, my mum and my dad always keep their shoes on now when they visit ever since I had our baby, it's like as soon as they arrive they instantly want to see baby so just walk straight in and don't think they are causing any extra work cleaning for us. It's happened a lot now so it's not a one off that I can just brush off unfortunately. We have a tiny hallway which think might be part of the problem as don't have space for a chair or stall for someone to be able to sit on to take their shoes on and off on and can understand it might me harder for older people to bend over etc but they used to take their shoes off. When I was heavily pregnant I sat on the stairs but can't expect everyone to do this.

Downstairs is laminate flooring which I guess is easy to clean, but we also have rugs which they step on (which are hard to clean as wool), and upstairs is carpet. I do have a small carpet cleaner, but it's more for spot cleaning than entire areas of carpet and is a lot of hard work to do a large area. Plus I'm not really sure I want to have to clean all the floors, carpet and rugs every time people come to visit as have a newborn baby so don't have a lot of time to be dedicating to cleaning.

Recently our cat got really unwell resulting in lots of expensive vet visits, blood tests, stay at the vets, drip fluids as been so unwell, and now special food to help stomach recover etc. the vet thinks that it may have been something brought into the house perhaps via shoes as she is an indoor cat. It could well have been our shoes that brought something in, but we do take them off in the hallway and then they get put away and I clean the hallway floor daily.

We've spent the day disinfecting the whole house as baby who could easily catch a gastrointestinal upset so I want to be extra careful now, but even when he is a bit bigger and putting things in his mouth, crawling and walking I want to know things are clean for him in our home.

Do you think it is unreasonable to ask next time anyone comes around to ask if they can take their shoes off? I'm not really sure how to bring this up though and I don't want to cause drama especially with my FIL.
I'm thinking of putting a small foot stall next to the hallway just inside the living room (there isn't enough room to put it in the hallway) so people can take their shoes off on there and it's easier to keep clean. But it is made of wool so I'm a bit concerned that it might get dirty. Would it be better/ridiculous to get a collapsible ottoman and bring that out when people visiting and store away easily when not?

OP posts:
CraftyGin · 09/02/2022 18:49

@elfycat

No.

The downstairs is tiles except for one room. This was deliberate so that people don't feel they have to plus as I'm a slattern they are often in need of a mop... you wouldn't want to dirty your nice clean socks

I think I would be worried that their white socks would not be so white after their visit. Grin
Nottsure · 09/02/2022 18:50

Yes and if people refuse then they don’t come in

Tiana4 · 09/02/2022 18:51

Tell your parents and PIL to take their shoes off at the door

Don't accept anything less you have a baby so no one eats shoes in my house and I have wooden flooring downstairs, I still don't want dirt trodden in . You've already said they are treading dirt and mud in.

What strikes me is that you don't feel able to make your own rules in your own home. They were your parents when you were young, you're an adult now it's your home your rules

"Hey folks stop there, shoes off in the hallway please."

The only time I make exception is if one was disabled and unable to remove shoes or had orthopaedic shoes that they needed to walk safely in

They can buy slippers to leave at your house or leave in the car or they want. Slippers aren't expensive- £5-10 for a pair of lovely ones,

Don't let your parents or PIL run roughshot over you. You can text to prewarn then if need be. "Hi mum and dad/ Dad in law, please take your shoes off when you come into our house. If you want you can leave some slippers at our house in cupboard Thankyou."

litlealligator · 09/02/2022 18:51

Yes it's gross to leave your shoes on in the house. Since spending lots of time with my husband's family in Japan, I dream of having a genkan so the shoes/no shoes zones are clearly demarcated!

GTAlogic · 09/02/2022 18:51

Yes, when people come to our house they take their shoes off. We can't afford to keep cleaning dirty carpets or to replace damaged carpets.

Blossomtoes · 09/02/2022 18:53

We can't afford to keep cleaning dirty carpets or to replace damaged carpets.

Carpets are designed to be walked on, shoes don’t damage them.

nokidshere · 09/02/2022 18:54

Why do people think socks are clean? I've had people take their shoes off at my house and they leave sweaty footprints on my wooden floor.

I am always barefoot (unless I'm going out in the car) and never wear socks or tights and would normally take my shoes off if I go to someone's house but I don't ask people to remove theirs at mine. I don't mind either way.

Tiana4 · 09/02/2022 18:54

I visit people at home as a professional and I ask when I arrive . In Most homes people ask me to take my shoes off and seem glad I ask. As it's such a normal rule- no shoes inside house!!! I wear easy to slip off shoes bc of that.

Visiting GPs and nurses won't though

fanjosaysi · 09/02/2022 18:55

@LittleMissMoggy

I find the idea of keeping shoes on bizarre. Shoes are dirty, why can't people just wear socks or slippers? I don't even have to ask, everyone I know just takes them off.

Also uncomfortable. You can't put your feet up on the sofa, I don't even understand why you'd want to.

Lucimaya · 09/02/2022 18:56

Generally, yes they take their shoes off, we don't wear shoes indoors.

The central heating man didn't, oven cleaner man didn't either. I ended up with mud over my carpet stairs with the former Confused. Maybe it's a work person thing but find this happens a lot.

I find it rude not to take shoes off, or at least ask, but probably wouldn't ask them if they didn't

Chocomelon · 09/02/2022 18:56

@CraftyGin

We are a 'shoes on' family.

I find it really inhospitable to ask people to remove their shoes, and hope they haven't stepped in dog turd.

I have a Hoover...

I don't think a Hoover cleans the floor only vaccums it or do you mean a carpet cleaner?
Scarby9 · 09/02/2022 18:58

We are a shoes on family. Came from shies on families.
I take my shoes off in other people's houses if they ask, and ask if I should if they don't.

If you are going to ask people to take their shoes off on laminate flooring, could you tell them in advance to bring slippers? Cild and potentially slippy otherwise, and eg my older parents would think it rude to display their feet in socks (but would change into slippers if asked).

areyoubeingserved1985 · 09/02/2022 18:58

We take our shoes off in the hall but don't expect any visitors to do it.

Yazu · 09/02/2022 18:59

Shoes off in our house. For visitors like HV or handyman I have pack of disposable shoe covers. I make sure not a single person enters the house with shoes standing near entrance Smile

Susurrar · 09/02/2022 18:59

No shoes upstairs here! Not fussed about downstairs, floors are easy to clean there. But I just hate the idea of shoes in the bedrooms, on the carpets. To be fair, it’s not often that visitors go upstairs and all DS’s pals take their shoes off immediately when they get in - no idea why because I never asked for it.

Tiana4 · 09/02/2022 19:01

@Blossomtoes

We can't afford to keep cleaning dirty carpets or to replace damaged carpets.

Carpets are designed to be walked on, shoes don’t damage them.

Muddy shoes do Who wears dirty shoes into peoples houses ? That's so rude
Violinist64 · 09/02/2022 19:02

Shoes off household here, especially as we had a new carpet in the living room a couple of years ago. The one exception is my music room, which is separate from the rest of the house and I explain to pupils and their families that it is my work room/studio so I am very happy with shoes on there. It would take too much time between lessons for children to take their shoes on and off.

I take my slippers when visiting other people’s houses except for one set of friends, who are lovely people but their hygiene is not a particularly high standard.

Svara · 09/02/2022 19:04

Everyone takes off shoes except my grandmother when she's just visiting. She normally wears shoes inside and they are usually clean as she is always home unless taken out. When we've taken her out walking and they are muddy she takes them off.

phoenixrosehere · 09/02/2022 19:04

I ask beforehand because where I grew up there was never a firm culture of you must have shoes on or you must not. It was always either you ask or the host tells you.

Saying that, I do try to memorise who is what so I remember to wear socks. We only require shoes off if you’re going upstairs (beige carpeting). Our sons drop stuff all the time, the double pram sits in the living room, and I do gardening (indoor and out) so no point of being shoes off on our ground floor and best if you do unless you want to step on bits of banana, apple, crisps crumbs and sometimes compost. I can easily whip out the vacuum and clear it away. I vacuum once a week anyway and we have a robo vac that mops. My only annoyance is when people ask if they need to take their shoes off, I say no, please keep them on and they take them off anyway. What is the point of asking then?

Kazzyhoward · 09/02/2022 19:04

We're a shoes off house too. But we also have a box of plastic shoe covers and offer those as well, especially to the likes of tradesmen/deliverers etc who obviously need to keep their shoes/boots on for safety reasons - shoe covers are a good compromise.

IncompleteSenten · 09/02/2022 19:04

I leave it up to them. Some people just take them off, some don't. It's fine with me either way. I want guests to do what they are comfortable with.

If they ask I tell them there's no need and make a joke about it being cleaner outside than inside

hiredandsqueak · 09/02/2022 19:07

Family visitors do automatically, I wouldn't ask people outside of family to take their shoes off though.

macshoto · 09/02/2022 19:08

No (at least not downstairs) as we have flagstone floors (farmhouse).

Upstairs is real wood floors and therefore shoes off / slippers for everyone.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 09/02/2022 19:09

I don't request it but most people do. We are a shoes off family. I always take mine off going into someone else's house.

Sh05 · 09/02/2022 19:10

I think it depend entirely on the home owner and what they normally do and find acceptable.
We don't wear shoes in the house, anyone who comes is normally of similar practice so they'd take them off. Obviously wouldn't expect trades people to remove shoes but that's normally pre arranged so I always put down sheets although the engineer who fit our boiler brought his own covers to put on over his shoes as he saw we didn't wear them in the house.
I've even had HVs and midwives ask if we'd prefer them to take shoes off