4 year old assembly “girls can be boys”

[AnotherNameChanged1234]

Is this the norm? My childrens school had an assembly (via zoom of course) on boys can be girls and girls can be boys. The whole school attended - rising 3 year olds through to 11 year olds (nursery is part of schools here -devolved U.K. nation)

I’m so angry, this doesn’t feel age appropriate at all. I’m so angry, my 6 year old was sobbing over it and it completely took me off guard.

I’m not an anti-trans person, I have some good friends who are trans, I’ve seen the pain they’ve gone through, and I’ll always encourage sympathy and no judgement, but this seems like madness. 3 and 4 year olds barely even know what boy and girl are. These poor kids have had two year’s socialisation stolen away from them, can’t we just let them be kids for a few years?

AIBU to be cross, or is this the norm in every school?

YABU- it’s the norm
YANBU- it’s not the norm for this age group

Did you actually sit in on the zoom assembly or is this just second hand from your 6 year old who may have got things confused? Did you know what the assembly would be about before it happened?

Hopefully the school can give you some clarification on what was presented incase your DD has misunderstood what was said

Given even trans people and trans charities etc can't even agree on what ot is and frequently have terms which contradict eachother I very much doubt the 6 year old misunderstood anything. Creating misunderstanding is often the entire point

“ I do think that trans education needs to be careful about conflating someone’s personal interests with their gender identity. It should be clear that there’s no “girls toys” and “boys toys”.”

This is the core of trans education though.
This is the basis of every single story about a trans child. (I knew I was trans because I liked football and wanted short hair, therefore i (a girl) am a boy)
The whole premise of a trans child is flawed and rooted in sexism.
Gender brings nothing positive to the table.
It brings everything to stereotypes.

I don’t hide trans stuff from my own kids, I’ve explained it in an age appropriate way

And how did you do this without resorting to stereotypes or born in the wrong body-both of which are banned concepts and terms?

My son when younger once asked if he would be a lady or gentleman when he's older (in his words). I wasn't sure where it come from, maybe it was from something similar to this 🤷‍♀️ I'm all for awareness and it wouldn't really bother me but I can see why you are annoyed.

At the very least, they should have sent home a letter for parents. My kids school have sometimes sent home a letter when something sensitive has been spoken about. They've also sent home a letter to say what year group is learning in the terms of pshe and all topics in that bracket. Handy to know what they are learning about.

Schools should not be actively promoting the idea of transitioning to another gender. Children are still at a formative stage, and need to find out for themselves who they are. If they do have issues about their gender, then support can be offered, but it should not be offered as a choice before children have had a chance to work things out for themsel ves.

I think the worrying thing is that this is being left to individual schools and they vary a lot in how they approach it.

Some schools just stick with breaking down gender stereotypes e.g. girls can play football and boys can play with dolls - all good.

But other schools seem to take it further e.g. if a girl feels like a boy they are a boy (and vice versa). I think this is incredibly worrying as a young child will likely interpret "feeling like a boy" as liking football etc and think this means they are actually the opposite sex.

My DD is 7 and has two female friends in her class who are very gender non-conforming (tomboys, in old language). I really worry that they will be pushed down a transition route (social, then possibly medical).

Absolutely ridiculous and unnecessary, they are pandering to the virtue signalling nonsense to appease the few not the many. I'd be furious too op.

Well this is insane isn't it. Great way to completely confuse the kids at a very young age. I'd be pretty unhappy and would let the school know.

She was probably crying because she was confused...what completely inappropriate content to be forced upon 6 year olds. I would absolutely complain.

It matters what the children understood not just what the speaker said. They should always speak to young children with clear messages that cannot be misinterpreted.
The excuse 'oh the child just misunderstood what was said' is no excuse at all.

Of course they might have been clear and be pushing an ideology which of course is harmful in its own right.

My son when younger once asked if he would be a lady or gentleman when he's older (in his words). I wasn't sure where it come from, maybe it was from something similar to this

This is a perfectly normal developmental stage 2-3. It's similar to the whole concept of self. No baby actually grows up to think it's not a separate person from its mother, it's a natural stage they grow out of as their brain develops.

The problem is a combination of trans ideology and misunderstanding of normal child development/manifestation of anxiety in older child has led some parents to believe their children are 'trans'.

It's not benign. Surgery and hormones lead to poor health, shorter lifespans and sterilisation. Which is why it has no place in schools.

You are completely right to be furious.

I do think this is very confusing for young children. My DD is nearly four and she wouldn’t understand it.

But having read about this tragic case today, I think schools need to teach older children about gender dysphoria to prevent trans and gender non-conforming children from being bullied.

[https://www.miltonkeynes.co.uk/news/people/pupils-in-shock-after-bullied-classmate-aged-12-reportedly-takes-his-own-life-in-milton-keynes-3560190]

www.miltonkeynes.co.uk/news/people/pupils-in-shock-after-bullied-classmate-aged-12-reportedly-takes-his-own-life-in-milton-keynes-3560190

If children are being bullied schools need to address bullying not teach gender ideology.

Exactly.

[quote Cattenberg]I do think this is very confusing for young children. My DD is nearly four and she wouldn’t understand it.

But having read about this tragic case today, I think schools need to teach older children about gender dysphoria to prevent trans and gender non-conforming children from being bullied.

[https://www.miltonkeynes.co.uk/news/people/pupils-in-shock-after-bullied-classmate-aged-12-reportedly-takes-his-own-life-in-milton-keynes-3560190][/quote]
They should be helping the gender confused children access the mental health services they need, firstly.

This is why I don’t want my children to go to school, it’s ridiculous.
For those asking why a 6 year old is sobbing, some children are sensitive and being told essentially that you ‘might not be a girl’ or you can ‘just decide to be a boy’ is bloody confusing. Not only will the child now be wondering if she’s a boy but questioning what makes her a girl. It is too much for children to deal with.

I would wait to see what the school says the assembly was about and how it was delivered before going in all guns blazing

Are you really sure about what's the message was, since it was targeted such a big age range.

Small children can get bullied for being different. My ds was teased for having long hair or did a sowing club in ks1. Stereotyping is there from quite young age, and it most likely come from parents at that young age.
Teaching you can do whatever, regardless of being a boy or girl from young age is a good thing, imo.

Homophobia is rife yes.

Telling lesbians that lesbians can have a penis is a fine example of this. Which is what gender ideology does.

Transition cab ifteb be a symptom of many things. Autism, sexual trauma , experience of homophobic bullying etc something staff at the Tavistock attempted to speak out about.

Slapping a trans lable on a lid and attributing all the problems onto other
People to sort by complying qoth unreasonable demands , instead of drs and therapists doing doing job of trying to get to the bottom of it, which they cant because when told a child is trans its deemed conversation therapy, does not help the child.

You cant force the responsibility of upholding what is a private personal thing onto unconsenting strangers. They have no obligation to play along.

That job falls to parents drs and therapists to give them the tools to help themselves.

That's the biggest problem. The outsourcing of responsibility.

*sewing

I'm not surprised the kid was upset - she may worry that she will actually turn into a boy. If the school are presenting messages that are open to misinterpretation by children, prioritise current political trend thinking over age-appropriate content and present ideological narrative as if it were fact, then they are very much at fault.

I would definitely take this up with the school - I don't know if they have LEAs in Wales, but I would think there would be some equivalent body you could approach. I would ask to see their policy on this kind of content. If it is promoting gender ideology, it would be interesting to know if they're aware that similar policies have been withdrawn by some LEAs in England because they are legally problematic.

@saraclara

Why was your six year old sobbing about it?

Maybe she was scared she was suddenly going to wake up a bit one day. These things can be confusing to a little child.