AIBU to feel overwhelmed by non-binary, cancel culture, and woke society?

[FordSiesta]

I've got to the stage where I feel quite apprehensive about the future. It just feels like there will be no 'men' or 'women' or 'boys' and 'girls' and everyone will need to conform to various gender identities and have to remember all the different ways people identify so as not to accidently offend anyone. I'm supportive of transgender people and understand people changing from male to female or vice versa but now there's all this non-binary stuff it's getting confusing.

All these things going on in this 'woke society' and if you aren't seen as wanting to conform with all this new stuff then the 'cancel culture' comes at you.

I just feel like I would be happy if there wasn't so much pressure placed on people to get pronouns correct if for millions of years we've used he/him and she/her and now we need to say they/them when we were taught in school they/them was plural.

I don't have kids yet but I do wonder if I did what the world would be like for them growing up.

AIBU for wanting to just continue with two genders?

@babyjellyfish
Sex isn't a belief system. I differentiate between gender and sex.

Genetically, my colleague is (most likely - I never checked) female. Genderwise, he's a man. This wasn't a whim decision or some experimentation. He transitioned. Good enough for me. I don't even get why it's an issue.

Yeah, but who cares what his genitalia are? Whose business is it?

@TheKeatingFive

Since a uterus or ability to bear children or ovaries or whatever does not define womanhood.

DNA does

Agree. Of course it defines sex (for most of us at least).

[quote Balaboostah]@babyjellyfish
Sex isn't a belief system. I differentiate between gender and sex.

Genetically, my colleague is (most likely - I never checked) female. Genderwise, he's a man. This wasn't a whim decision or some experimentation. He transitioned. Good enough for me. I don't even get why it's an issue.[/quote]
Sex isn't a belief system, no. Gender identity is a belief system, for which there is little (if any) evidence.

What do you think a man actually is, if not a male person?

Gender isn't a belief system, it's a social system.

@Balaboostah

Gender isn't a belief system, it's a social system.

I didn't say gender, I said gender identity.

Gender = stereotypes about the roles of men and women. (Feminists have been fighting against these for centuries and now it looks as though transgender ideology might set this progress back by decades.)

Gender identity = an individual's innate sense of self, which is personal to them. Zero proof that "man" and "woman" as gender identities actually exist.

Gender doesn't mean stereotypes! It's way way more than that. This isn't just about boys wearing dresses. It's the socially constructed characteristics of the different sexes. It's way deeper than stereotypes and is extremely powerful and pervasive. How a person personally experiences gender (aka their gender identity) may not match that social/cultural milieu with their physiological characteristics.

@Balaboostah

Gender doesn't mean stereotypes! It's way way more than that. This isn't just about boys wearing dresses. It's the socially constructed characteristics of the different sexes. It's way deeper than stereotypes and is extremely powerful and pervasive. How a person personally experiences gender (aka their gender identity) may not match that social/cultural milieu with their physiological characteristics.

What is it then?

Because people are very quick to explain all the things that it is not, but typically when you ask them to explain what it actually is, you get tumbleweed.

@babyjellyfish

Blimey, there's so much research out there on gender! You need to do some reading if you don't understand gender beyond stereotypes. There's certainly no tumbleweed!!

As i said, it's the socially constructed characteristics of the different sexes. It's the norms, behaviors, and societal roles expected of individuals based primarily on their (perceived) sex. It's not just stereotypes.

[quote Balaboostah]@babyjellyfish

Blimey, there's so much research out there on gender! You need to do some reading if you don't understand gender beyond stereotypes. There's certainly no tumbleweed!!

As i said, it's the socially constructed characteristics of the different sexes. It's the norms, behaviors, and societal roles expected of individuals based primarily on their (perceived) sex. It's not just stereotypes.[/quote]
No, explain it to me like I'm five.

You said gender is the "socially constructed characteristics of the different sexes".

What are the characteristics of a woman? And what are the characteristics of a man?

My colleague who transitioned is very much a man. That's the correct gender for him. But he could (in theory) give birth

Only if the literal meaning of words has changed to no longer mean what they do.

And yes gender is a belief system.

Fojn, exactly, that's my point, I don't understand the anger with young people experimenting with their gender

@Momicrone

Fojn, exactly, that's my point, I don't understand the anger with young people experimenting with their gender

It's not the young people we are angry with.

It's the people in power, in politics and medicine, who have thrown safeguarding completely out of the window to worship at the altar of gender ideology.

Lifeturnsonadime - your daughter may one day decide to join that group of people you're not comfortable with, also I didn't really understand the end of your post, rejecting femininity does not mean you are trans?

Babyjellyfish , some of the language on this thread has also been very negative towards young people

Fojn, exactly, that's my point, I don't understand the anger with young people experimenting with their gender.

Really sorry Momicrone but if you think that's what happening then I'm not sure you've investigated that thoroughly.

It's this in 10 foot high, neon flashing lights.↓

It's the people in power, in politics and medicine, who have thrown safeguarding completely out of the window to worship at the altar of gender ideology.

@babyjellyfish

With all due respect, you should be old enough and intelligent enough to do your own research on what gender is. You can even Google it and there will be plenty of explanations. I don't owe you explanations of a complex and mutlifaceted issue wheb plenty of excellent material is easily available because you're too lazy to do your own research.

[quote Balaboostah]@babyjellyfish

With all due respect, you should be old enough and intelligent enough to do your own research on what gender is. You can even Google it and there will be plenty of explanations. I don't owe you explanations of a complex and mutlifaceted issue wheb plenty of excellent material is easily available because you're too lazy to do your own research.[/quote]
Yeah, I have Googled it. There is a lot of meaningless guff which I don't understand, is not relevant to most people's lives and doesn't actually get me any closer to understanding what a woman is, if not a female person, or what a man is, if not a male person.

I have undergraduate and postgraduate degrees and work with words for a living (in two languages).

I do not believe all these blue haired teenagers on TikTok understand what gender is any better than I do.

I don't believe you do either.

@Scianel

My colleague who transitioned is very much a man. That's the correct gender for him. But he could (in theory) give birth

Only if the literal meaning of words has changed to no longer mean what they do.

And yes gender is a belief system.

Of course gender isn't a belief system. Something which is socially constructed isn't (necessarily) a belief system. No one 'believes' in gender, ffs. Gender equality is not a question of belief

"gender equality", do you mean equality of the sexes, or equality of people who conform to their society's gendered expectations?

If I don't conform to the gender roles etc of women in my society, does that make me not a woman?

You can roll your eyes all you like Balaboostah, but the belief that people have an innate gender that is different to sex and is sometimes mismatched, is a belief system.

Of course gender isn't a belief system. Something which is socially constructed isn't (necessarily) a belief system. No one 'believes' in gender, ffs. Gender equality is not a question of belief

Gender identity is a question of belief though.

Either you believe "woman" is a gender identity shared by about half the global population and "man" is a gender identity shared by the other half, or you don't.

I don't.

Do you?

@babyjellyfish
I'm sorry you find the concept of gender so difficult to understand. You did seem to think it was all just about stereotypes. I'm glad you've now admitted that actually you don't really understand it.

But just because you don't understand the concept of gender and haven't done the research, don't assume no one else does
.
I have no idea what blue haired teenager you're talking about and what that has to do with the concept of gender BTW.

[quote Balaboostah]@babyjellyfish
I'm sorry you find the concept of gender so difficult to understand. You did seem to think it was all just about stereotypes. I'm glad you've now admitted that actually you don't really understand it.

But just because you don't understand the concept of gender and haven't done the research, don't assume no one else does
.
I have no idea what blue haired teenager you're talking about and what that has to do with the concept of gender BTW.[/quote]
You can try to patronise me all you like, but out of the two of us, I am apparently the only one who can explain what I believe a woman is.

@Scianel

You can roll your eyes all you like Balaboostah, but the belief that people have an innate gender that is different to sex and is sometimes mismatched, is a belief system.

Well yes But surely so our Fairies exist Covid doesn’t exist The earth is flat