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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU...is he being innapropriate?

171 replies

Theresalwaysonebadapple · 06/02/2022 19:58

One of the dads in ds' class at school watches my stories on social media every day. We are reasonably friendly but for me anyway its only in a platonic way (we are both married). I'm just not sure if it's a bit odd or if I'm overthinking it? He must know I know he's watched them but he carries on anyway every single day

OP posts:
11plusName · 07/02/2022 07:00

I mean, for all you know he and his wife watch them together for a laugh and think what a dick you are…

Silvershroud · 07/02/2022 07:00

AFAIK it is not possible to know who has viewed you, it is a basic rule of FB to stop just this kind of thing. I'd like OP to explain how she knows.

TigerLilyTail · 07/02/2022 07:02

@Silvershroud

AFAIK it is not possible to know who has viewed you, it is a basic rule of FB to stop just this kind of thing. I'd like OP to explain how she knows.
It is possible on FB stories.
TheDaydreamBelievers · 07/02/2022 07:03

@Silvershroud Instagram shows exactly who has viewed your stories

RussiasGreatestLoveMachine · 07/02/2022 07:04

@Silvershroud

AFAIK it is not possible to know who has viewed you, it is a basic rule of FB to stop just this kind of thing. I'd like OP to explain how she knows.
What?

We’re talking about stories here, not posts to go into FB news feeds.

You can tell exactly who’s viewed your stories.

RampantIvy · 07/02/2022 07:06

Surely people aren't this dense?

Copasetic · 07/02/2022 07:08

Yes this is totally inappropriate behaviour. In all honesty I would report to it the police. Nip this in the bud now before it gets out of control.

RussiasGreatestLoveMachine · 07/02/2022 07:08

Crikey, I’m over the hill and out of touch, and even I know this shiz….

ineedsun · 07/02/2022 07:10

I don’t get this. If you have loads of followers and are ‘creating content’ for people to view why do you have an issue with him watching it? Sounds like that scene from The Favourite where the queen is yelling at the footman ‘look at me, look at me’ and then when he does she screams ‘stop looking at me!’. But I fully accept that all this use of social media is way over my head so what do I know?!

CristinaYangismySpiritAnimal · 07/02/2022 07:10

You sound insane.

onthinice · 07/02/2022 07:12

Well I didn't know that people could see when you've viewed their stories. Every day is a school day!

TigerLilyTail · 07/02/2022 07:16

@onthinice

Well I didn't know that people could see when you've viewed their stories. Every day is a school day!
This is how the whole Wagatha Christie thing started.

Colleen Rooney started posting fake stories to her private Instagram account and she would make a list of those who had viewed the stories that got leaked to the press. When she ended up with the name of the only person who had viewed all the stories that got leaked to the press, she named that person.

Yes, it's sad that I know all this!

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 07/02/2022 07:22

@Silvershroud

AFAIK it is not possible to know who has viewed you, it is a basic rule of FB to stop just this kind of thing. I'd like OP to explain how she knows.
OP isn't talking about who has looked at her profile, she's talking about the stories you publish that are only viewable for 24h.

On both Facebook and Instagram, you can see the profile information of anyone who views them. I even get notifications every time someone has liked or reacted to them and on Facebook I get a notification that tells me who has viewed them before they disappear.

Havehope21 · 07/02/2022 07:26

I think you are overthinking it, I just click through people's stories - doesn't mean I am particularly interested or even watching the whole thing... just bored and browsing.

onthinice · 07/02/2022 07:28

@TigerLilyTail 😂 Makes sense. I knew it was like that in Instagram but didn't realise it was the same on Facebook. Good job I never look at anyone stories, sounds creepy to me!

RedRobin100 · 07/02/2022 07:35

Lol

Kochicoo · 07/02/2022 07:36

Agree with another pp, could be the couple watching it together out of curiosity that it's someone they know/for a laugh. We have a school mum who is trying to build up an insta following and i do think some parents watch for that reason other than they love the mum

girlmom21 · 07/02/2022 07:41

If you have built up 'quite a following' it's weird that you're scrolling through everyone who's viewed the post to see whether he has...

Maybe take a bit of time away from Instagram.

CleanUpTime · 07/02/2022 07:42

This bas got even more bonkers

You have a blog/vlog. Im sure you have multiple hashtags that allow people to see the content you create. If this dad follows one of those hashtags such as #fashion and why wouldnt he if hes into clothes then your content will come up he doesnt need to follow you he can follow content that your blog is linked to.

I think this thread is bonkers honestly "oh no someone looks at my stories....oh but they dont follow me....ah but its a publicly available blog on fashion and makeup content..."

DePfeffoff · 07/02/2022 07:47

Given you're not friends, then I'd say a little strange that he's actively searching out your accounts to watch your stories every day. However he might just genuinely be a nosey Nelly

As has been pointed out, you don't need to search actively for these things to pop up.

Why block him? Is this actually doing you any harm?

MrsLargeEmbodied · 07/02/2022 07:49

and he probably doesnt know that you know.
stories just come up and go through automatically, it doesnt mean he has paid attention.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 07/02/2022 07:50

my dd left her instagram account logged on to my computer,
i was able to watch all sorts of stories,
no idea that it showed she had watched them

fungibletoken · 07/02/2022 07:59

How old is your DS? Does he have a daughter with whom he might be watching them?

AlDanvers · 07/02/2022 08:07

In which case - yes, it’s most likely kind of low level voyeuristic.

Unless the op is naked, having sex, in pain etc and he is aroused by that its not voyeuristic.

However, as lots of people said he may not even be watching them properly just flicking through stories.

Blogger usually want as many people as possible to watch them. That's how you get more popular.

To assume he is seeking out purposely watching the op to get some jollies, is entirely made up.

If op actually wants to make a success of her account, then people she knows will come across it. That's how is works.

IamnotSethRogan · 07/02/2022 08:11

Does he have a daughter who he maybe watches the videos with